h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It sounds like it was a great day. I hope you feel the same way about your husband as you did on the day?

I note you had a disco. I went to a wedding recently and they opted for barn-dancing which I thought was a good idea as it got everyone involved and made people mix.

I once asked my now dead gran what she understood by "love" given the fact that she had been married for a long time. She thought for a while and said that "love" meant that if someone fell into some water and was drowning and there was a significant chance that you could also drown if you went in to try to save them - you would still jump straight in to rescue them. I thought this seemed a reasonable explanation. What do you think?

Thanks so much for responding!! The day was sooo great. And yes, I still feel the same way about my fella. There is a kind of intimacy that develops, an easiness with each other. I agree with your Gran. My definition of love is being unable to imagine a happy life without that person, knowing that there would be a hole in yourself, that used to be filled with what you shared. I love him because he sees me, you know? And he loves me because i see him, too, when other people don't. Of course there are so many other reasons. We are each others shelter.

Sorry to be so heavy...I just adore the guy! We didn;t really have disco as such, it was more of a dance - he played all kinds of things and everyone mixed really well. There was this one couple, who haven't been getting on well lately, who danced together ALL night. It was soo lovely.

I remember reading this article a few weeks ago and since then I have gotten engaged! Yay! Any advice? It all seems so daunting as it involves one or both of us moving and starting new jobs and planning a wedding seems to be such a nightmare. I really want to enjoy the day as does DD but I am scared that we'll still be too stressed from all of the organising etc.

Congratulations! Ok I won't kid you and say its all wine and roses...hubby and I nearly came to blows a few times over the organising...but making up is always fun, don't you think?! I really don't think you can avoid getting stressed, just make sure you take time out to do fun stuff that has nothing to do with the wedding. And have as much fun as possible organising it - we seemed to turn everything into an excuse for a meal out or day trip for everyone concerned! And make it known from the start that your (you and blokeys) word is law...i mean it...be open to suggestions but its so easy to end up trying to please everyone. My stock phrase became 'yes, but, it's our day and we want...' But my number one piece of advice is delegate as much as you can on the day...let everyone else look after you and whatever happens smile and enjoy it...desite what everyone says stuff does not always go wrong at a wedding! I found chatting with other like minded girlies and blokes on the web quite helpful in the Forum at www.weddingguide.co.uk. But if you need to chat or get stuff off your chest feel free to mail me! ([email protected])

Cheers Maisie - I may come to you for help if I get stuck. I have saved your email address. To be honest I am glad you said it wasn't all sunshine and roses because we have already had our first discussion which had me pressing for a decision and him wavering. We will get there but I effectively have 3 Mothers to deal with and of those mine is turning out to be the easiest going and I NEVER thought I would say that!

I tried to get my fella involved at first, but I got so fed up of his wavering (and inability to take it as seriously as me!) that i tried to narrow choices down to two or three things before presenting him with them...sounds mean I know but sometimes he just didn't get it...hehe...having 3 mothers to please sounds like a nightmare! Mine was great on the whole...couldn't have done it without her... and Rod's mum didn't seem too bothered about being too involved, so i guess I was lucky! If act like you are really sure about what you want it helps.

Well we have already narrowed it down to a geographical area and I have already managed to persuade him that morning suits are the way to go. Thing is I can't turn to any of the mothers at the moment because we want to present some of it as a fait accompli and not bother with all the pressure they would put on us to have a religious ceremony! To be fair to DD he has already said he is crap at making decisions and prefers me to give him a choice of a few things. Then he can decide!

Clever lass! You've got the idea...Repeat after me..."Its our day, and we'd like..." We had morning suits but a bit different. We didn't bother with the top hats! Rod went for black jacket, balck and grey pin stripe trousers, with a dark red cravat and a patterned waistcoat. The fellas looked fwoargh. As for venue, try and get somewhere you've been before or thats been reccommended to you to minimise chances of disaster! Whens the date?

Next september we hope - we thought it would be nice to get married a year after our engagement. We looked through some magazines this weekend and DD has seen a look we both approved of - dark suits (no tails) with quite high neckline, white wing collar shirt, waistcoat and cravat. We thought we would have his waistcoat made to match my dress and the best man's to match the bridesmaid's dress. As for places, most of my friends got married abroad (vegas being the most popular) so it is hard to get a recommendation but I have seen a few places that might be suitable. I keep wondering if I am planning this too early but then I figure the more I do now, the less running around there will be later! I'm kidding myself, aren't I?

Nooo you aren't doing stuff too early! We were engaged for a year before we set a date, and we set the date for a year later and started organising straight away. Its really so you can get what you want - wedding stuff gets booked up pretty quick! I would say the most important bit is the venue for the wedding and reception, then the photographer and cars. And if you want a particular florist, then book them early too! But you're right, there will be stuff to do right up to the last minute! September will be lovely - Autumn weddings are my favourite. What kind of a dress are you having? (cor you are satisfying my wedding addiction, I didn't even realise I was suffering withdrawal!)

We are looking at venues now but as it will be civil we are hoping not to have cars because we will already be at the hotel or wherever. DD's Dad's girlfriend is a florist and has said she will do the flowers. I'm going for a more unconventional dress - not the usual colour and nothing very frou-frou. I've also decided I don't want a veil. I can't say too much because DD might see. When I get a firm idea I will email you with details. What was yours like?

Of course you can't tell me about your dress on here! Sorry I was daft there...Well I started off wanting something simple, cream empire line actually, but they just didn't suit me at all. I went for ivory in the end, I'm waaaay to pale to wear white! It was a princess style dress, with a corset type top and a floaty skirt and a puddle train. I thought it would be way over the top but I loved it when I tried it on. I had a veil, but it was pinned really low down on my head so when I had 'unveiled' you couldn't really see i was wearing one, so it wasn't too intrusive. Are you going to have bridesmaids? Hope I'm not being dense but won't you need cars to get to the hotel from your house?

What I was trying to say is that we may get ready at the hotel too because we might be there the night before. It depends on where we hold it!
Your dress sounds lovely. I can't wear white either because I'd look like frosty the snowman or something equally white and devoid of colour. I did think of cream but then so many other colours suit me better it seems a shame to restrict my choice simply because of tradition. I may have one bridesmaid which will be my kid sister if I can persuade her to wear something that doesn't show off her navel ring or tattoo! At least I was planning on allowing her to wear her favourite colour!

I can relate to the snowman thing! I got my sister to choose bridesmaids colour - I just said I wanted NOOO PASTELS and she chose a beautiful dark green colour. It suited all of them. Oh I see about the cars! Dense woman I am. Whereabouts are you after having it then?

Somewhere in the Bristol area we think. If we can find somewhere we both agree on (including price). Unfortunately if I am going for a non-traditional colour then my litte sister is restricted in the choice of colours she can go for but that won't be a problem. How many bridesmaids did you have?

Hiya Ginger,

I had four bridesmaids. I was originally going to have 2, my sister and my best mate, but then I was getting a three for 2 deal on the dresses, so I asked a mate who needed cheering up. Then my Nanna died, so I asked her great grand daughter (my second cousin) in her memory, she was only two, incredibly well behaved and very gorgeous! There must be some gorgeous places in Bristol?

I just had a look at that wedding guide I was telling you about. They have a lovely venue on their website about 30 minutes from Bristol - http://www.weddingguide.co.uk/ClearwellCastle.html

It looks lovely (especially the honeymoon suite) and I have filled out the brochure request form. I have some brochures already. Three have been discarded as not suitable and front runners are the Cadbury club and the Avon Gorge Hotel. I've decided on having only one grown-up bridesmaid because if I ask friends some will feel left out and I think my cousin's little girl will be too young still. I would have liked one from Doug's side too but there is a dearth of females there!

Hiya! Hope you had a good weekend. Wedding plans still going ok? You could always get a disgruntled young lad to be a page boy! Hehe. What kind of grub do you think you'll have?

Things are going fine. I have to arrange a couple of visits to places for next weekend so things are ever moving forwards. I did think of getting my nephew to wear a velvet little Lord Fauntelroy suit but he is 20 and likely to beat me up so I've abandoned that idea. The food depends on where we hold it but the reception meal will probably be sit down but nothing too heavy. In the evening we are just going to do a light buffet for everyone. We are both starting to get really excited about it all!