How it all began...

Roderick and I met in a great, rowdy Irish pub called O'Dwyers in Middlesbrough, on Thursday March 7th 1996. It was actually little old me who approached him, after one long look into his lovely green eyes, the first time I had ever been brave enough to face rejection from a fella. He hadn’t intended to go out at all that night and was only there for one drink....The twists of fate!

Roderick first proposed to me after three months and to my extreme horror, I wanted to say yes, but managed to persuade myself that it was a bit soon. He tried again three months later, at which time I realised I had met my Waterloo and gave in. We officially got engaged on August 31st 1996, and set our wedding date for just over two years later, Saturday October 10th 1998.

The night before...

I was sitting in bed on Friday night with a head full of pinned curls and a rather cute pink hair net, mulling over a year's worth of planning and fretting. Would it all go to plan? Would Roderick turn up? Would I turn up? I was beginning to understand why people choose to elope - the pressure was very difficult to deal with. I finished writing my speech at about midnight, and I surprisingly had a good, restful night’s sleep.

The Big Day

I awoke at 8am, amazingly me for me, before my alarm. I wandered into Mum’s bedroom and climbed into bed with her for an hour, opened some of the cards which had arrived that morning, and chatted over last minute plans. After being the calm one for so long, Mum's nerves went into a tailspin at around 10.30am. At which time I became so calm I surprised myself! Roderick phoned to see how things were going, and sounded terrified, which made me feel great because to my annoyance he had been cool as a cucumber for weeks. Thats very demoralising for a girl, you know.

Mum and I set off for the hairdressers at 11.00am, and I had a relaxed hour or two getting pampered and beautified. The unforeseen problem of my veil arose then - it was about six feet long - so after the hairdresser put it in my hair I had to wind it round myself and carry it home in my arms. On the way home we went and had a sneaky peek at the church, St Mary Magdalene's, Billingham, and it was as beautiful as I had envisioned - filled with flowers and fruit and corn and candles. Reality began to creep in then - this was actually happening to me...

As soon as I got home I changed into my posh undies and sat around looking like a lingerie model with my veil on, according to my sister, Anne-Marie. Soon my bridesmaids, Catherine, Louise and Rae arrived and slipped into their dresses with the minimum of fuss - even the two year old!

Time suddenly started to run away with me - I managed to climb into my fairytale dress and the photographer arrived and I tiptoed carefully downstairs for photos and everyone oohed and aahed at me, then the cars arrived and everyone oohed and aahed at them and the bridesmaids left in their white Rolls Royce, and suddenly I was on my own with Mum. We stood on the front doorstep, amazed at the beautiful October sunshine, and Mum held my hand and reassured me, without words. That fifteen minutes was the longest of the day. We climbed into the beautiful vintage white and navy car and the driver took us on a stately drive around the town, making the most of the car as we only live five minutes from the church. Some little kids waved and shouted “Happy Wedding!” at me, and the tears nearly started. But the church soon appeared before us and events started flying by again.

The Church

The organist began the Bridal March from Lohengrin and everyone stood. My bridesmaids went down the aisle first and Mum helped me adjust my veil and dress. After a deep breath on both our parts, Mum took my hand and led me into the church. I smiled at as many of my friends and family as I could on the way down the aisle and people kept mouthing “You’re lovely!” and for once I truly felt it. My sweet Roderick was crying, and he said I was beautiful and my heart was soaring above the heavens. I felt so calm, and couldn’t stop grinning, poor Roderick looked terrified. The service went so fast. Mum read the passage from Corinthians about love, and Roderick’s Aunty Beryl read the beautiful Blessing For a Marriage. They both read directly to us, not to the congregation, which was beautiful, and again nearly brought the tears.

Roderick and I drowned in each others' eyes as we said our vows. We sung Make Me A Channel Of Your Peace and I Vow To Thee My Country at some point,¹ before moving to the front of the church to sign the register, with the organist playing Canon in D Major by Pachelbel and Bach’s Air On A G String in the background. Roderick and I negotiatated me and my dress back to the altar and soon we were walking back down the aisle together as husband and wife, to the soaring sound of Mendelssohn’s Wedding March and the rapturous applause of our friends and family. By this point I was completely elated.

As we left the church into the blazing sunshine, we were showered with bubbles and confetti, a handful of which ended up down my cleavage, courtesy of Rod’s Aunty Beryl. The chauffeur popped the champagne to the loud cheers of our lovely families and friends and we toasted each there and then whilst flashbulbs popped all around us.

The Reception

We arrived at the Hardwick Hall Hotel after another stately journey through peaceful countryside in the golden autumn sunshine. The chauffeur stopped at the top of the drive under some trees for a photo or two, before taking the top down on the car, and we meandered down the long drive in the open air, to the cheers and shouts of our guests. Thanks to the unexpectedly gorgeous weather, most of our photos were taken in the grounds of the hotel in the lazy afternoon sun. More were taken inside beside a beautiful, ornate fireplace and beneath a huge shimmering chandelier. Finally, after severe faceache was almost setting in, it was off to the reception room where our guests were helping themselves to arrival drinks. The reception line took ages to get through, everyone wanted to chat and wish us their best! Soon we were sitting down, although this was a little difficult to negotiate due to the size of my dress.² The toastmaster was a wonderful asset, he kept things running smoothly so we always knew what we were doing next. After a lovely meal, he announced Mum and she gave a really moving speech, with an embarrassing tale or two about myself, and a lovely welcome for Roderick. Roderick’s speech finally started my tears though, which meant I was unable to do my own after such careful planning. My big sis took over, so the thanks to my Mum, and Dad and Nanna, who have passed away, did get said. David, Roderick’s Dad, was his best man, and he said something lovely about me - that if arranged marriages were still the norm, he couldn’t have chosen better for his son. I was pretty much an emotional wreck by this point!

After the toasts, the serving staff expertly cleared the tables away and prepared the dancefloor for us. Time had whizzed by and it was 8pm already! Our First Dance was to ‘Feels Like Home’ by Bonnie Raitt, a song from the soundtrack of one of the first films we had seen together, ‘Michael’. Apparently we had everyone in tears, the words were so beautiful, even the DJ commented on how appropriate it was. The party was soon in full swing and I sneaked up to our room to change. I had intended on leaving my dress on, but it was incredibly heavy and I was beginning to overheat! The do went on till around midnight, when even Rae, my two year old bridesmaid was still bopping away.

As the guests left, they all commented on what a beautiful day it had been and what a wonderful time they’d had. Soon only those staying over at the Hotel with us were left, and despite some brave talk about keeping the bar open, they soon meandered off to bed. The staff kindly carried our gifts upstairs for us, but despite our intentions they remained unopen till the morning. Ahem.
We had breakfast the next day with our family and friends, an extension of the wedding! And left our room in a wrapping paper and confetti mess for the hotel staff, but I‘m sure they’re used to it!

We truly had an amazing day, memories of which I will hold dear to my heart for the rest of my life.