Here they are - the winning entries for this season's Caption Competition. Congratulations to all the successful h2g2ers and a big 'thank you' to all who took part.

• Round 1
1. Horror as the harmful rays from the sun start causing peoples' faces to melt.
   - If the universe is infinite, then im "a" center
2. When visiting a new planet for the first time, always check the local gravity conditions before disembarking.
   - Peet
3. This is what happens if you throw yourself at the ground and don't manage to miss...
   - Niwt
• Round 2
1. And if I press this button, your hairline recedes even further - look!
   - Dr E Vibenstein
2. The cloning process was yet to be perfected.
   - Archangel Dr Justin
3. The comeback tour of Bros was tragically delayed when Luke couldn't remember the words of "When will I be famous" and had to get someone to put the words back into his mouth.
   - LuckyStar
• Round 3
1. VIP was rather confused about whether you were meant to use a flamingo or pretend to be one.
   - Cafram
2. There was just 1 minute to go and the other "Worm Wangling" contestants were looking despondent!
   - Stainless Rider
3. The back-up plan was just fine until the man from Del Monte turned up asking for his oranges back!
   - Whisky
• Round 4
1. DoctorMo and Xanatic spent much time trying to find out whether this was really a lifesize wax figure of Queeglesproggit or if the "don't touch" tag was yet another of her cunning disguises.
   - Toy Box
2. The female could only flash a nervous smile as the males advanced luckily she was not at a corner table.
   - Jimi X
3. She never noticed one of his hands was operating on its own.
   - SEF
• Round 5
1. FOR THE LAST BLOODY TIME, IT'S FORTY-TWO!!!
   - Thog
2. You are the apple of my eye. In fact, you look quite delicious. I'm glad I used my fixodent today!
   - SEA change
3. Do I have something stuck in my teeth?
   - nineofeight
• Round 6
1. In an unguarded moment, Abi reveals the secret fuel on which Italics run during meets: E-numbers and glucose syrup.
   - MaW
2. Chocolate covered ants are so delicious. Oh my God, is this one tastes like a Pharaoh. Is it Amy?
   - SEA Change
3. Can I stop posing for this stupid caption photo yet?
   - SEF
• Round 7
1. I'm down with the kids, man, you dig? So don't you go givin' me no diss for bein' a sk8r boi, reeespeck.
   - Lucky Star
2. Male Model Syndrome strikes again.
   - Croz
3. You're beautiful baby don't ever change!
   - Shea the Sarcastic
• Round 8
1. Bonnie & Clyde - the later years
   - GreyDesk
2. Her: "What d'you mean, there's no line dancing! I've been practising my Tush Push since last Meet!"
   
   
   Him: "Thank Bob for that! No more boot scooting at my end!"
   - LuckyStar
3. Kerr looks for an escape after discovering that Bruce's real name is Susie...
   - broelan
• Round 9
1. The prospect of walloping Ashley's balls with a baseball bat quickly attracted an orderly queue.
   - Master B
2. Due to h2g2's sudden occult following, most of the 2003 Summer meet-up attendees sadly await their pending doom from the 'Hootoo Gods' who plan on sacrificing their bodies.
   - Darth Zaphod
3. The British hootooers use the opportunity to give their foreign friends an example of the joys of queueing.
   - Farrago
• Round 10
1. The cloakroom attendant gets trampled after making the mistake of calling out, "Whose anorak is this?"
   - Summerbayexile
2. Oh dear, the Richard Clayderman appreciation society are back in town again.
   - GreyDesk
3. "Revenge of the Nerds 4" was promising to be an uproarious film.
   - Master B

Abi

21.08.03 Front Page

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