A Conversation for Designated Drivers
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Peer Review: A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Started conversation Jul 17, 2003
Entry: Designated Drivers - A1090559
Author: Agent X - U227955
This entry has been in the Writing Workshop F128971?thread="smiley - bluefish" title="bluefish" class="smiley" src="http://www.h2g2.com/h2g2/skins/Alabaster/images/Smilies/f_bluefish.gif"/>
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Posted Jul 17, 2003
One day I will get the hang of these conversation links
This entry has been in the Writing Workshop F128971?thread=293704
And the Collaborative Writing Workshop F128971?thread=291543
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Zarquon's Singing Fish! Posted Jul 17, 2003
This might be a good link for this entry:
http://www.portman-group.org.uk/campaigns/57.asp
I have personal experience of losing a family member through a drunken driver. It's worth emphasising that when you've had a few, it's not easy to recognise if someone else has had a drink, so the person you choose has to be reliable, not someone who's going to crack partway through the evening, or someone who will have one or two at the beginning and then not drink later.
Drinking below the limit affects your driving and impairs your judgement and your reactions.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Posted Jul 19, 2003
Thanks
I am going to try and work it in there, but my friends wedding is this weekend so I will get to it next week.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Zarquon's Singing Fish! Posted Jul 26, 2003
Hi Agent X,
You need to spell check the entry. I haven't gone through with a fine toothcomb (although I can if you want), here are a few that jumped out at me.
public transit > public transport
last nights party > last night's party
to by their drinks > to buy their drinks
What to Do with a DD once your drinking > What to Do with a DD once you're drinking
why their not drinking > why they're not drinking
wreaking your own car > wrecking your own car
I also think that it would be worth emphasising that you need someone else to drive if you've been drinking at all, and not just if you intend to get drunk. For instance, if I went out and had two or three drinks, there is no way I would drive; if I'm driving, I simply don't drink.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Milos Posted Jul 26, 2003
It might be worth mentioning that many clubs and bars are happy to serve free non-alcoholic drinks to designated drivers. I don't know if this is true on the eastern shore of the pond though.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Posted Jul 31, 2003
I have updated the entry
Thanks Zarquon's Singing Fish! and Miloso
I try to catch my spelling but I am really bad at that. I am sorry it took me awhile but I have been busy lately and not in the writing mood.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Zarquon's Singing Fish! Posted Aug 1, 2003
Hi Agent X,
As entries are meant to be written in the third person, this sentence will have to go:
'Let me know by posting below.'
Oh, another typo jumped out at me:
don't want to be board > don't want to be bored
It might be good to reword this:
A DD is a good idea no matter how much you have > A DD is a good idea even if you only intend to drink a small amount - any alcohol will affect your judgement and response time.
or something similar. This entry seems to imply that you will mostly want to get blotto - it's not always the case.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Posted Aug 1, 2003
Originally the top portion was only for the writing process which I why I wrote it and left it in first person and sectioned it off, just like the link to my Beer Goggles entry I am currently writing, I know it will not be in the edited entry its just there for people right now. But now I think it (the top portion) may be good in the edited entry so I have changed it. Let me know your thoughts.
Also does anyone have more tips for "The Ride Home" section?
"This entry seems to imply that you will mostly want to get blotto"- I have thought that too although that was not my intention
I did write "On any night out on the town you should consider how you're going to make it home in your inebriated state." and by this I meant "On any night out" maybe that does not come through as I intended.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Zarquon's Singing Fish! Posted Aug 18, 2003
There's still a link to an unedited entry (Beer Goggles), which really needs taking out; it is adequately explained in the footnote anyway.
The sentence, 'Respond by posting below.' needs to be taken out too.
It *still* feels to me as though the entry is aimed at drunk people, as opposed to drinking people (the reference to pulling on the handbrake. Maybe if the footnote saying 'A DD is a good idea no matter how much you intend to drink" could be reworded to say:
'A DD is a good idea if you intend to drink any amount of alcohol.' (Even below the 80mg limit, the risk of crash involvement increases markedly 'in cases of fatal accidents involving adults, between one third and one half of drivers have been found to have a significant (even if legal) level of alcohol in the blood.').
See http://www.parliament.the-stationery-office.co.uk/pa/ld199798/ldselect/ldeucom/082xvi/ec1611.htm for full text.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
J Posted Aug 20, 2003
>>The sentence, 'Respond by posting below.' needs to be taken out too.
No it doesn't. It could just be reworded. Collaborative entries often say something like "Why not share your thoughts of designated drivers in the Conversations below..."
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Aug 24, 2003
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Posted Aug 26, 2003
Between moving twice in three months and getting ready for my last quarter of college I have now managed to do some updating to this entry.
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
The Professor Posted Aug 29, 2003
this sentance doesn't sound right: "Your friends who give you safe transportation when you have been drinking."
The Professor
Societas Eruditorum
A1090559 - Designated Drivers
Agent X Posted Aug 29, 2003
>>this sentance doesn't sound right: "Your friends who give you safe transportation when you have been drinking."
When you say “drinking” as its own activity it implies alcohol in America, as “I am going out drinking”, maybe this is not so in the UK? Let me know because I am always interested in the differences between American and British English. When I wrote it I was trying to think of a different way to say it so how about “Your friends who provide you safe transportation after you have consumed alcohol.”
Also if this sentence was confusing was “A designated driver is your buddy, or mate, who cares enough to stay sober while you are drinking.” Also confusing?
Your friendly neighborhood
Key: Complain about this post
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Peer Review: A1090559 - Designated Drivers
- 1: Agent X (Jul 17, 2003)
- 2: Agent X (Jul 17, 2003)
- 3: Zarquon's Singing Fish! (Jul 17, 2003)
- 4: Agent X (Jul 19, 2003)
- 5: Agent X (Jul 26, 2003)
- 6: Zarquon's Singing Fish! (Jul 26, 2003)
- 7: Milos (Jul 26, 2003)
- 8: Agent X (Jul 31, 2003)
- 9: Zarquon's Singing Fish! (Aug 1, 2003)
- 10: Agent X (Aug 1, 2003)
- 11: Agent X (Aug 14, 2003)
- 12: Zarquon's Singing Fish! (Aug 18, 2003)
- 13: Zarquon's Singing Fish! (Aug 20, 2003)
- 14: J (Aug 20, 2003)
- 15: Agent X (Aug 22, 2003)
- 16: Zarquon's Singing Fish! (Aug 22, 2003)
- 17: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Aug 24, 2003)
- 18: Agent X (Aug 26, 2003)
- 19: The Professor (Aug 29, 2003)
- 20: Agent X (Aug 29, 2003)
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