h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This thread is here for those time when we are so outraged by something that attempts to deny that we have actually suffered anythng and that the solution to all of our problems is to 'simply' get over it.

Such statements are betrayals of that person's inability or unwillingness to understand the real nature of what we have experienced and the nature of it's effect on us and those around us.


Krispy quoted a line from the movie "Great White Hype" in which a character quoted his father as having said, "Smile and the whole world smiles with you, cry and I'll give you something to really cry about, you b*****d!"

Some people would take that sort of attitude on the part of a parent as 'somewhat' excessive, but could not begin to understand how having been raised in that sort of emotional environment must ultimately warp the formation of pesonality and promote all kinds of pain -- even if the threat were never fully carried out. "After all," that person might say with every good intent in the world, "your father was just trying to teach you to get along. He didn't really hurt you. Get over it."

Or, if you were to show the actual scars from having been given something to cry about, "Gee, that's awful. But, that was all those years ago. He was a real b*****d, but he's not beating you anymore. Get over it."

All these fall into the same category, as Adams wonderful definition of flying, 'to fly, all you need to do is fall towards the ground and miss.'

This leads us to the proper answer to such a statement.

Angry: Of course, you twit! Do you happen to have any valid suggestions as to how?!

Sarcastic: Dear God! Of course! How could I have failed to latch onto such a truly stupid concept as that.

Innocent: Really? Gee, that changes everything.

Superior: Du'uh!

Inferior: I'm not sure I understand. Would you mind explaining that in terms my feeble mind can grasp and enfold?

Ecstatic: Praise the Lord! I'm cured!

Sinister: I really wish you hadn't said that. I'm not sure there's room in the back lot for another body. What was you home address, again?

Philosophical: Cogito ergo f****d up.

Overwhelming: Oh, I see. Everything is in my head. The past is the past. If it's over, it's over. I doesn't matter any more. There's no point crying over spilt milk. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. Nothing succeeds like success. Never give up the ship! The show must go on! I know I can, I know I can, I know I can! I AM the ruler of the Universe and you are all my humble and loving slaves. Kneel and receive my blessing or stand and receive my curse! Erm ..... sorry. Were you saying something?

Incredulous: I don't believe you just said that! You are the first person to ever suggest that ... My G-d! ... I'm over-whelmed! Do you happen to have a pencil and paper? I must right that down.

Accepting: Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. That does it, I'm cured. Thanks.

Singing: "Etc.! Etc.! Etc.!" ("The King and I" Rogers and Hammerstein)

We all need to vent on occasion. This is a place to do it. Our mission, should we choose to accept it, is to either post an incident that infuriates us or to ridicule the people making such stupid comments. The goal is to recognize that the world is full of idiots and that they don't matter.

If "90% of everything is crud" (Sturgeon's law) then we must not be depressed by that in addition to everything else. Rather, we must actively seek out the other 10% and embrace it for not being 'normal'.

Another goal, of course, is to arm ourselves with snappy come-backs so that we won't ever need to say, "Gee, I should have said ..."

Please, also feel free to post those times when you didn't simply cringe and the results of your responses. We will all benefit from the laughs and use the failures to polish our own efforts.

Do not do to others, what you would not have them do to you.

But, if they do it to you, do it right back till they understand that they did it or they collapse.

Everyone go out to the lumberyard and select an appropriately sized clue by four. Before you can lead the mule, you must first get it's attention.

Barton

Need a visit to the lumber yard for these folks.

http://www.usnews.com/usnews/issue/030616/misc/16bishop.htm

I am all for seperation of church and state but this is sickening.
Poor time and excuse to start wanting to enforce it in this matter. sexual abuse and the church legal issues

VENT VENT VENT


*See The*

See The

nice, liberal people make fun of the stupid English woman!

Ho ho ho!

*See The*

See The

survivor fight back; yes folks, once more unto the breach & all that!

Get over it? Never!

Fight aginst it?

Always!!!



Terri.

(*See The* ing rather noisily)

Smile and the whole world smiles with you, cry and I'll give you something to really cry about, you b*st*rd!"


Er, yes. My mum's favouite version iof this was to pick up the red & white stick ; this was what used to be my doll's broom handle,but now had a dual purpose function.

1) To draw the curtains at night.

2) As a particulrly effective beating tool; delicious stripes in nice easy lengths.

So, each evening, as darkness approached, so did the dread of what would happen next;

mummy reaches for the stick.

Terri flinches.

mummy launches into full attack mode.

Terri cries (but quietly, of course)

mummy utters immortal words:

"I wasn't GOING to beat you THIS time, but you flinched, so I've given you one just for flinching!"

Night night, sleep tight!

Try getting over that one. And lots more like that.

Funny ha ha?

Terri

Hey Abbi -- the same bishop has just been busted for a hit and run --

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/135012767_webcard16.html

*sigh*

Tell me about it. Mom didn't bother with "The Stick" (do they all call it that?) much once I got bigger (I was certainly big enough at 4 or 5 to hold my own right?). It wasn't worth the effort to try to figure out where I'd hidden it the last time, especially when using her own hands inflicted so much more pain.

"Cry, and I'll give you something to cry about" is an all-too-familiar sentiment. Of course, when you quit cringing and begin laughing when they're beating you down is when the men in the white coats come and put you in the Quiet Room. It's not really all that Quiet, you're still screaming... but if no-one hears you scream, you cease to be a problem, right?

But They're right, of course, you should Get Over It. Let It Go. It's not happening now, so how could it possibly affect you? Well, the sad truth is, it *is* happening now, over and over and over again.

I've tried "getting over it", and it damn near killed me. I'll never get over it. But I will get on with my life and have a damn good one, too. And if the world gives me something to cry about it, then cry I'll do. I can handle it.

Read that link. Thanks Mickey .
The Bishop is a perfect example of *a wolf in sheeps clothing*

Hi psychocandy; yes, I think "the stick" is the favoured term; unless you've been really bad then it's "do you want the poker?"
*giggle* "Oooh, yes please mummy!"

How the hell I actually physically survived 11 years of this amazes me!

Abbi, it may sound daft, but it won't, but can you make sure you spell Mikey's name right please, bit of a if not!

Thanks,

Terri

Actually, y'all, I have occasionally pondered changing my sign-on here from Mikey to Miki. I've gone by either spelling at times, Mikey more often when I was younger, Miki more often now, largely because people seem less likely to mistakenly assume that Miki is male. Not that there's necessarily anything wrong with being gender-ambiguous, but I'd just as soon not be referred to as a 'he'.

They are pronounced more or less the same, although Miki has the advantage that it can also be pronounced so that it rhymes with 'tiki'.

On the other hand, I've always tried to studiously avoid moniker changes (in fact, this one has really never been changed -- I've changed the bits that come after the Humming Mouse, but never the main bit), as I find them horribly confusing in other people.

What do y'all think?

Hi

Absolutely nothing against your name or any variation of it , simply something I personally have to come to terms with; When it is spelt the same as a certain Hollywodd character, it has associations which, at the moment, cause me pain;

It will pass;

I love though, so does Yoda, but possibly for different reasons!

Terri.

Barton misquoted me ever so slightly - it wasn't '...cry about, you b*****d' it was '...cry about, you LITTLE b*****d'.

I'm pedantic with purpose here. Along with the constant sense that you *deserved* to hurt in silence, comes the understanding that you couldn't do much about it anyway because you were a CHILD.

Yes, people telling you to get over it stinks, bien sur. But the key here is it TRIGGERS. The feeling of being not only duty-bound to hurt, and in silence; but powerless against it aswell, because you were half the size of the person who made you feel that way in the first place.

Many times I've been triggerd by one or other form of aggression which I could quite easily have defended myself against and with some force because I was at long last, BIGGER than they. But I don't. Instead, I regress emotinoally, put up *no* form of self-defence, and still feel in those circumstances, incapable of defending myself or more to the point ENTITLED to do so. So I wrap myself up in my guilt complex, internalise everything, let the anger become depression, load up on drugs, self-sabotage and maniacally plot the destruction of Earth.

(Brief rest for while we think about boundaries)

I've talked about '3rd personalising' and stepping up for your inner child, but I still find it hard to do, or even remeber to do, when I'm triggered. I can be as angry as I like about the slowness of a download and the cultural status quo, but I still can't find the strength to be angry at someone, especially someone I care about, until it becomes big and ugly and projectile. Perhaps I need to move somewhere where everybody rants and it's no big deal.

But, until then, here are a few snippets from The Projection Room, my internal film studio. Conversations between K (no, not Kafka Krispy, duh) and ALF (Arbitrary Loathsome Figure) This is purgation, and the tone may be a bit triggery, so please take a deep breath and proceed with caution.

This is 'L'esprit de l'escalier' (mods - fr. 'Spirit Of The Stairwell', the moment when you realise all the things you wished you'd said. )

Scene 1: A bar. K is nursing a drink and looking sullen. ALF passes.

ALF: Smile! It might never 'appen!
K: Thanks. I'll try to remember that next time I'm stood over the skeletal remains of my cancer-stricken mother and her abusive sociopath husband. D'ya hear that, Mum and Dad? He's telling me it might never happen. I'll drink to that.

A trifle passive-aggresive perhaps, but if you think that's bad you obviously haven't checked the sleeve notes of Radiohead's OK Computer

Scene 2.
ALF: Cheer up, for God's sake!
K: Hmm. Why?
ALF: Because you're getting me down!
K: Is that a fact.
ALF: Yes it is, you miserable
K: Ok, but tell me. When did my depression become your problem?
ALF: Errr...
K: Are you so incapable of generating your own feelings you have to depend on mine? Considering that my misery is grounded in years of grief, abuse, rejection and abandonment, do you honestly think I'm going to cast that aside for your sake, you selfish insouciant ?
ALF: Oh. Well, no. I suppose not. Sorry.
K: I've got a killer plan. Why don't you try CHEERING ME UP? Tell me a joke! Buy me some crisps!
ALF: Er, ok..
K: Actually, you know what? Don't bother. From the look of you I'd say you have neither the wit to make me laugh nor the intelligence to remember what flavour I wanted between now and the time you get served.
ALF: Oh. I'm sorry.
K: Don't worry about it. The look of incredulity on your face is the most amusement I've had all day. Good work, Samaritan, now off, I feel like having a party all of a sudden

One day, I'll walk the talk.

Personally, I love the name Miki

http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Palms/9226/

Subject of many a teen fantasy she were. And I met her

Ok Terri .
Because I am terribly inconsistent at spelling anything....
I will likely avoid it entirely if possible.

How about the humming ?
It's not my choice so please let me know *MHM*

I mean it is not my place to choose an alternate nickname, MHM may not want me to use one BTW ~ How is MHM?

I'll go be quiet now.

I'm trying to remember some of my best if-only-i's-said-that comebacks. Unfortunately, they all seem to be gone.

I'm rather fond of your Screening Room world as the people there seem to actually listen to what you are saying to them without taking offense at how stupid or self-centered they have been.

In my visions, I try to think of such stunning combacks that after they are delivered the targets lie about senseless on the ground, requiring me to step over their still smoking remains as I leave.

('Jane, you ignorant s**t!' as she tumbles from her seat, only my comebacks are more specific, to the point, and less pejorative than logically devistating.)

Next time I think of one, I'll post it.

Meanwhile, I really admire the hope in your world. Please, keep that strong.

Barton

Yep, hopeless optimist, that's me

I thought of another one. Half Man Half Biscuit lyrics -

"The weatherman says it's going to be a miserable day,
But I happen to like drizzle, so get your facts right."

Right on. All the time I hear weathermen talking about miserable rainy weather. Speak for yourserlf, b*tch! In the summer heat, which is regularly depressing (though I've managed to reduce it to between the hours of 1pm-6pm, June-Sep) torrential rain is a joyous, exhilarating, blessed relief.

Just another case of failure to appreciate that the world don't move, to the beat of just one drum, what might be right for you, may not be right for some

Hey, you're not alone in hating the heat and loving the rain... I wish it would pour down buckets today so I could walk in it for hours and wash off some of this oppressive, smothered feeling... and it's not even *really* hot yet. It's like I've been strapped in a ing strait-jacket. Shit. Time to crank up the aircon and get used to the idea of sitting home alone while everyone else has fun, again.

I have to be locked up in airconditioning too when it gets hot.
I hate that part also. So far we are having a long spring.

Nuerological problems can make the heat intolerable.
It makes symptoms worse and makes most people irritable after awhile.
Terri was sweltering in France and without a fan,she did get one finallyYay!

Well, the good news is it *did* in fact pour rain today... from my mouth to god's ear, eh? The temperature's dropped a bit as well, though not for long, I'm sure. It's supposed to be well into the nineties next week... aaaaaagh!