h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

to be honest, I think they're both on the side of things

Hey Kaz,

Since you are seeking to learn more about bipolar illness, I must recommend an excellent, excellent book called An Unquiet Mind. It is an autobiography of Kay Jamison, who is a doctor, and who has bipolar illness herself. It's a great read, very informative, both touching and funny by turns. When I read it I kept mentally checking things off in my head - yes this happened to me, and this, and this.

You asked if the meds keep me okay. Yes, they do for the most part. I have had to go in the hospital a couple times though. I tend to rapid cycle, go up and down very fast - I get spells where I am extremely tired and cannot function very well, that's the depressive part. But my antidepressant keeps me from getting too depressed, and the Zyprexa keeps me from getting too manic, most of the time. I don't feel like the medicine dulls my moods too much - I still have normal emotions, normal enthusiasms.

When I do get manic, I tend to get what they call "idea of reference". That's when things I hear on TV, or in movies, or even just in conversations, seem to be about me, when they don't actually apply to me at all. They seem directly addressed to me. Whenever this happens it's a sign that I'm too manic, and need to go up on my medication. It's a very bizarre thing to experience, let me tell you! The first time I became manic, I actually drove to a radio station, because I was so convinced they were talking about me!

Kaz, it's good that you can laugh about some of the delusional stuff. I can relate. I've thought I was different people, including Ophelia in Hamlet. (Which was rather appropriate, yes? Since she was mad.)

JEllen

Oh, and I agree with Krispy, keep both threads going - see what you get!

Hi JEllen, its good to hear that your meds work for you, I get this impression that they dull all moods and experiences, its nice to learn that isn't true.

How handy but weird to have that signal when you are too manic, I do get paranoid but I've never yet thought programmes were being directed at me. What happened when you drove to the radio station, unless you would rather not say!

Ophelia was quite mad, I liked the film version where she was played by Helena Bonham Carter. I used to live my life pretending there was a film crew following me, but that may just have been teenage boredom!!

Take care, and I will look out for the book

Helena Bonham Carter is the best Ophelia that I've ever seen. She must have done some research, because she was very authentic.

There's not much to tell in the radio station story. I went down to the station and asked to speak to the morning deejays, and was told that they had left for the day.

It was probably a good thing that they had left!

Hi again everybody. Since I am schizophrenic and tend towards being delusional, I'm very interested in understanding the phenomenon of delusion. Ellen, could you perhaps tell me in detail what it was like for you to believe you were Ophelia? How did you perceive yourself and your surroundings, and what did your mind do with all the stuff that was going on around you that would have seemed to contradict your idea that you were Ophelia?

Let me mull that one over a bit, Willem.