h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

One of the few manias I have in life is that of making sure that all the loo rolls I come across are hanging the right way. By hanging the right way I mean hanging THE WAY I LIKE THEM TO HANG which strangely enough, according to the guide entry I've just read, is also the way XY-humans like them to hang. What's strange in that you're probably thinking, well, I'm not an XY-human, DEFINITELY NOT! I'm 100% XX-human! . (That's the only smiley that looks remotely like an XX-human. I'm certainly no "diva") I suppose there are always exceptions to the rule.

My obsession is such that whenever I come across a loo roll that is not hanging in the correct way (i.e. MY way) I take it off and turn it round. The problem arises when the loo roll in question has been inserted into one of those fingerproof gadgets that only opens with a key. I mean the kind that has three or four rolls inside at the same time and as one roll is used up then the next falls down. We have those at work, by the way. In that case I do my utmost to get the roll out of the machine. I usually have to squash it to get it out. Once out and turned round the difficulty is then putting it back in the machine and making sure it stays there. It's quite difficult to unsquash (don't think that word exists but it's what I want to say!) a loo roll, believe me.

So if by any chance you ever happen to be with me and I say that I just have to pop to the loo, don't worry if I seem to be spending an awful long time in there, it's just me turning round all the loo rolls.