A Conversation for Answers to Children's Questions

From the school of simple answers

Post 1

the_jon_m - bluesman of the parish

'Why is grass green? Why is the sky blue?'
-Because otherwise pilots would get confused and crash

'Why can't I have the latest whizz-bangosaurus-bot that's just been advertised on telly? (You're mean and I hate you!)'
1) Because we want to by you a cheaper copy so all yopur friends will tease you
2) Becasue far away, lots of little children are locked up in a big factory making these whizz-bangosaurus-bots so at a few evil men can drive big expensive cars and eat at posh resturants

'Why did Fluffy have to die? Why can't God get his own rabbit?'
Fluffy didn't like you, neither does God

'Did Jesus and Father Christmas go to school together?'
1) - Darling, now you're 3 I think you are old enpough to know the truth, there is no such thing as .... Jesus / school
2) No Father Christmas is just a marketing ploy by Coke

'Why do I have to give Granny a kiss? She smells!'
Because when you grow up you'll have do many things you don't want to do, so get used to it

'Where do babies come from? Why's it called "Birds and bees" - surely the size difference would make that impractical1.'
Argos
Because we want to shelter you and never let you find out about the wicked ways of the 'outside' world


From the school of simple answers

Post 2

GentleZacharias

"Why do I have to give Granny a kiss? She smells!"
Because Granny likes it, and until she's got her will written and filed, we have to do what Granny likes.


From the school of simple answers

Post 3

Quille the cynic...TC

Why is grass green? Why is the sky blue?...you'll learn that in school when you're older, it's not my job to teach you that. The elementary school teachers get paid to do it, so I'd really just be cheating them out of a good job, right?

'Why can't I have the latest whizz-bangosaurus-bot that's just been advertised on telly? That's called greed and it plays into the ploys of the advertising companies. Also, you have the telly, so just be happy with that. And continue to hate me, and I'll have to take away the telly, sorry.

'Why do I have to give Granny a kiss? She smells!'
It's called manners. It's the same as having to use a fork and knife at the table and whatnot.

My parents always answered my questions before I asked them. When I was 6 they told me about the tooth fairy because they were too lazy to keep taking my teeth from under my pillow in the middle of the night. Teaching your child to read and giving them books to read that are interesting and informational (fiction books have information in them too!) helps cut down on the questions. So do museums.

smiley - elf


From the school of simple answers

Post 4

the_jon_m - bluesman of the parish

Couldn't we just say :

42


From the school of simple answers

Post 5

Quille the cynic...TC

TRUE!
*bows to your superior skills*
smiley - elf


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