A Conversation for 'Clerks II' - the Film

Edited Guide Writing Workshop: A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 1

Bluebottle

Entry: 'Clerks II' - the Film - A87965879
Author: Bluebottle - U43530

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 2

Gnomon - time to move on

Clerks II

I see this film also has a Lord of the Rings reference.

Smith instead opted to make a low-budget comedy, surrounded by family and friends, initially hoping to make a film for a similar budget to Chasing Amy although his producer Scott Mosier persuaded him that for full justice to be given to the film's aims, a budget of $5 million would be more realistic, though still a smaller budger than the $20 million budget Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was made for.

This is too long and it has a lot of repetition: 4 budgets and 1 budger. smiley - smiley

Here's a rewording:

Smith instead opted to make a low-budget comedy, surrounded by family and friends. He had initially hoped to make something on the scale of Chasing Amy. His producer Scott Mosier, however, persuaded him that for full justice to be given to the film's aims, a budget of $5 million would be more realistic - bigger than that of Chasing Amy but smaller than Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.

It should be emphasised that though Weinstein financed the film but was not otherwise involved in its production
-->
It should be emphasised that though Weinstein financed the film, he was not otherwise involved in its production

that built on the characters already introduced but showing them coming -- remove the word "but"

The most difficult part of production was finding an empty fast food restaurant in America where they could film the fictional Mooby's and eventually found a disused Burger King
-- the grammar of this is wrong. The "eventually found a disused Burger King" belongs with "the most difficult part", suggesting that the most difficult part eventually found a disused Burger King. Reword it as:

The most difficult part of production was finding an empty fast food restaurant in America where they could film the fictional Mooby's. They eventually found a disused Burger King

The Silence of the Lambs reference and A highlight has to be -- you've joined two independent sentences here. Split them:
The Silence of the Lambs reference. A highlight has to be

particularly with regards what drove her to want to marry him -->
particularly with regard to what drove her to want to marry him
or better still:
particularly regarding what drove her to want to marry him (this reduces the repetition of "to")

relationship with his then-girlfriend Jennifer Lopez -->
relationship with his then girlfriend Jennifer Lopez

After their film Gigli (2003), which cost $77 million to make and only recouped $7 million it was apparent

-- since you've put a comma before the parenthetical phrase "which cost $77 million to make and only recouped $7 million" you should have a comma after it as well.

many of the Lopez scenes were removed from the version of the film actually shown in order to hopefully persuade audiences to actually see it

- I think you could do without the "hopefully" and the second "actually":

many of the Lopez scenes were removed from the version of the film actually shown in order to persuade audiences to see it

a new, open burger joint -- this sounds a bit clumsy. You could say:
a newly opened burger joint
smiley - smiley G


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 3

Bluebottle

This is indeed the film with the Lord of the Rings reference.smiley - ok

I've made the changes and sadly removed the smiley - badger.

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 4

Gnomon - time to move on

There's also the Mr Underhill LOTR reference in one of the other films


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 5

Bluebottle

I had thought about that being Frodo's travelling name to Bree, however it is closer to a scene in film 'Fletch' (1985) in which Fletch encounters a rude, arrogant man called Ted Underhill and gets revenge by using his name and tab, just as Jay and Silent Bob encounter Todd Underhill and travel across the US by using his name and credit card. Kevin Smith has been trying to make a 'Fletch' film based on the original novels for decades.

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 6

Gnomon - time to move on

smiley - ok


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 7

SashaQ - happysad and 'slightly mad'

When I first read this, I recalled a mention that it is very difficult to follow the plot if you haven't seen Clerks I, but now I think I was imagining it smiley - huh

I'll come back to this later... smiley - book


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 8

Bluebottle

'Jay and Silent Bob Reboot' is difficult to follow if you've not seen 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back' - 'Clerks II' is easier to follow if you've not seen 'Clerks' as only the two central characters and Silent Bob and Jay recur in the second film, with brief bookends set at the Quick Stop.

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 9

SashaQ - happysad and 'slightly mad'

Ah, thank you. I shall finish reading the Entry now smiley - ok

"reformed drug dealers" - this sounds like they are no longer drug dealers, but actually they are drug dealers who are no longer drug addicts - I see you say that in the next sentence, though smiley - ok

smiley - huh I did a lot with this Entry in my imagination - I spent ages learning about Bennifer and can't now find what I did... I think I thought the footnote could be tightened up a bit.

Seems it 'might' have been a difficult decision for Smith, but actually it was easy when he weighed up the evidence.

What was the budget of Chasing Amy?

You mention 3 times that TWC financed the film, so that could be tightened up a bit.

"Once again the film gathered a huge internet backlash" - does that mean 'Clerks' gathered backlash from the internet?

"this had only been abandoned because it was in the process of being relocated and the original restaurant was due to be demolished" - is this just saying one of many Burger King restaurant franchises in California was in the process of moving to a new building?

Strong conclusion smiley - ok


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 10

Bluebottle

Must dash smiley - nur but changes made.

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 11

SashaQ - happysad and 'slightly mad'

smiley - ok


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 12

h2g2 Guide Editors

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