h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Tiptoes into thread*



*Turns off light*

*From a long way distant, the sound of an alarm clock going off*



*Time passes. Quite a lot of it*



Huh?





AH HA!!!

No. It's no use. I overslept

YOU are the SOLO hootoo Hiding Champine! I shall inform Mr McWhirter at once

*Puffs up arms*

Nearly four days off Hootoo, I think we now who's the best Hootoo Hider.

As confirmed by Mr McWhirter!

Who came round with Eddie Waring!

And had some sandwiches (nice ones, on the good plates, obviously).

And then went away again But he said you were definitely going to be in the next edition! Soon as they've rustled up the cash.

You met him? Did he enjoy my mince pies?

Eddie Waring was there too? I've missed so much!

Perhaps I could give them some cash out of Chin Aid. I've gone so long without one, a bit longer won't make much difference now.

Mince pies? Er ... yes. He said they were great *burp* 'scuse me.

He also mentioned that RoboArgos kept pestering him to get in the book. Something about 'Most Generous Offer to a Nearly Completed Chinathon'

Only a few more donations until I'm whole again!

Must. Have. Fix.

Trin fix! Trin fix!

*Unwraps *



A pair of your smelliest socks?

Nah ... came by flant courier a few minutes ago. Forgotten what they said it was. A bin? A tin? Something rhyming with bin, I think - not chan or chun. Nope - can't remember

Thankyou!Thankyou!Thankyou!

My chin! My chin!

*Carefully takes chin out of box*



Look! There're fish already in it!

*Glances at instruction manual*



*Removes peas and attaches chin*

It needs charging up for the light. I'll have to run it off the mains for a bit.

Is there a plug socket over there?

You're going to plug it in *while* wearing it?

Righty-ho, sounds perfectly safe to me

It has a safety cut out, see:

"For own safety, cut out power before attaching chin"

Oh. Maybe I read that wrong.

Oooh! It takes batteries!



AA batteries!



AA batteries!





Got any batteries?

Yes!





*Big bag of batteries*

Some of these may be a little old, though - let's see, 'March 1982', no, 'September 1993', no, 'Janvier 1887', wow, no, oo! Here's some new ones!

*Puts batteries in*



Oooh...better be careful. Is it under guarantee?



Finally. I have my chin. *Sniff*

It's been a long time coming, but ...

Wow! What a chin!

What's that on the side? 'Made in Outer Mongolia, Best Before 2007, Do not use for leaning things on?' Nah, better not tell her - it'll be fine!

The downside to finally having my new chin is that I'm going to have to get rid of the lovely Chin Aid from my PS.

Naaah - fewer people know about this, the better: we can keep the money coming in and ... divert it. You know, to good causes and so on

You may have to wear a chin veil though Or cover the outside with peas. Or some sort of frozen pea motif, anyway. You know, just for a bit.