This week I celebrated my 42nd birthday. I wondered if reaching the number that Douglas Adams taught us is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything might bring with it some special, penetrating insight. Actually, and predictably, one of the main lessons from my birthday was that the hangovers get worse when you get to my time of life.

However, at times I do flatter myself that I've managed to pick up a little wisdom over the decades. One thing I have learned, for instance, is that apparently trivial tales can often tell you a lot about the kind of society you're living in.

Take this astonishing but true story, for instance.

A London clinic, Highgate Private Hospital, is currently providing a pioneering operation. It's a pretty serious, delicate procedure, involving the nerves in the neck. First, an incision is made under the patient's armpit. Then, a narrow tube containing minature forceps is inserted up to the base of the neck to clip some of the nerves there.

You wouldn't think that anyone would put themselves through all that unless it were absolutely necessary. Yet it seems that young executives from the City of London have been queuing up to pay £4,000 for the operations, apparently because they feel that their career prospects might depend upon it.

And why? Because the operations will ensure that they never blush again.

Highgate Private Hospital's surgical director, Anthony Mitra, has explained:
'It's a new technique, but we are doing four or five of these operations a day now, mainly on people who feel that blushing is socially disabling them and affecting their job.


'They are often young men in very high-powered, very high-pressured jobs who have to go into big board meetings and presentations, and they don't want their bosses or competitors to know that they are nervous or embarrassed.


'Any suggestion of weakness or anxiety makes them feel at a disadvantage, so this surgery enables them to go into a meeting knowing that they will look cool and calm and in control.'

You really have to wonder what sort of a culture it is that produces a situation like this, where young men are prepared to pay large sums to have themselves mutilated so that they'll never betray a natural human physiological reaction again. If they ever find time for a social life, they'll never be able to show a charming, natural again - but they're more than willing to sacrifice that part of their humanity in search of more status.

Perhaps the next trend will be for an operation to partially paralyse the facial muscles, for the executive who's afraid that a sudden smile or frown might betray some of that messy, inefficient human emotion stuff.

There's an ad that's had heavy rotation on British TV recently for a cold and flu remedy, that makes me want to throw something at the screen whenever it appears. It depicts two men in an office. Their conversation reveals that one of them took the day off sick yesterday. The other, sounding irritated, suggests that this may have put some vital business deal in jeopardy. The first man then smugly reveals that on the contrary, despite being ill, he was able to work from home and get the deal done thanks to his wonder medicine. The punch line reminds you of the name of the product and adds: '...because life doesn't stop'.

It's a viciously brilliant exploitation of the fear many people have nowadays that any sign of human weakness will not be tolerated by their employers. I hate the ad, but I have to admit that it probably accurately reflects modern employment culture - as do those bizarre, frightening anti-blushing operations.

Before I get too depressed, I'd like to move on to a story of fantastically insensitive management in which the workers successfully fought back. Health service employees in Huron County, Canada have forced their bosses to stop giving employees questionnaires that, in effect, asked them whether or not they were mad or hallucinating.

During the test, employees were asked to give their responses to statements including: 'I think I've lost my mind', 'I do very weird things,' 'I see these strange things that others don't see,' and 'I feel cut off from my body.'

56 paramedics in Huron County were ordered to take the online test, described as an 'emotional-quotient inventory,' before starting a six month series of emotional-training exercises. But, following strong protests from their union, the tests have now been dropped. Mark Borrmann, head of Local 4513 of the Canadian Union of Public Employees, understandably felt that the test '...was insulting and had nothing to do with saving patient lives.'

However, the management consultants who dreamed up the test appeared to be rather baffled by what all the fuss was about.
'It's training and it's self assessment,'

said Jon Hambides, a spokesman for Pomax Consulting - and I can understand his apparent surprise at the complaints. After all, the same test had been taken by over 33,000 individuals worldwide.

Which, I think, just goes to show how many people are too afraid to disobey orders, even when they're blatantly being insulted by their bosses.

Having said that, I should perhaps add that I took a great Weirdness Test right here on h2g2 a few weeks back. As you might expect, the h2g2 Weirdness Test is much friendlier, simpler and less intrusive than the Huron County one. If you haven't tried it already, I warmly recommend it. Personally, I was delighted to have my weirdness officially confirmed.

The difference is, of course, that it's one thing to do a fun personality test in your spare time, and quite another to be ordered to do a rather alarming one by your employer.

If I'd been one of those Huron County paramedics, think I might have tempted to reply:
'Yes, I certainly do some very weird things. This test I'm doing right now is pretty damn weird for a start.'

Finally this week, a story that absolutely delighted me. For ages, women have had their mood changes blamed on their hormones, even when the actual reason for the mood swing was something entirely different. Now, perhaps, we men may find ourselves being asked: 'What's the matter with you? Have you got irritable male syndrome again?'

Scientists in Edinburgh now believe that men's brains react in a similar way to women's to fluctuations in the sex hormones. Dr Gerald Lincoln, a researcher at the Medical Research Council's human reproductive sciences unit in Edinburgh, has explained that fluctuations in a man's testosterone levels have powerful effects on his mood. He says that a shortage of testosterone can make a man's energy levels drop making him increasingly moody and depressive - a condition that he has called 'irritable male syndrome.'

Dr Lincoln's research mainly focused on sheep, but he believes the same effects are found in humans. He has said:
'The best example is to look at men who receive hormone replacement because they produce insufficient levels of testosterone. When they stop their treatment, or are given a placebo, the irritable symptoms become very pronounced.'

And guess what? Yet again, working stress comes into the story. Dr Lincoln believes that stress is the biggest external influence over a person's sex hormones.

He explains:
'If there is a stressful situation at work, or a person has been in an accident, or an emotional situation, or has been taking drugs, hormone levels can fluctuate. These fluctuations are far more profound than we tend to realise.'


'While PMT, menopausal, and post-baby blues are all recognised as withdrawal hormone states, men have not had the same recognition. I think the important thing is to recognise the phenomena, then we can think about treatment.'

I'm glad to hear it - although some might question whether men need another excuse for behaving badly or sadly.

Anyway, that's the end of this week's column. Why? Because it just is, that's why! Do you have a problem with that?

Sorry. I don't know quite what came over me there. Now that I'm 42, maybe I need Hormone Replacement Therapy.

Ormy's 'Notes' and Other Scribblings

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