Is it True Love? I Say YES!
Created | Updated Jul 31, 2002
I've seen places on site where you can write about the happiest moment of your life. I thought about it and wrote a little piece about it. I, at first, could only narrow it down to two events; but now I've narrowed it down to one and I figured I would write it down for my first guide entry.
I met him while I was still a senior in high school. I worked at Target (for the second time) and so did he. I remember it was the holiday season. I got lucky enough to have the privilege to work with him in his department for a few days, usually I was a cashier.
I remember how cute I thought he was when I first saw him, and I instantly had a crush on him. At first, I didn't know how to act around him. I knew he was older than I was, so I didn't want to seem immature. I don't know why it mattered so much to me because I was in a relationship (later I found out he was too).
I think I was pretty quiet for possibly the first 30 minutes or so of working with him until I was more comfortable. We would talk about all sorts of things, just getting to know each other. Work, of course, went by pretty quickly. For once, I had fun at work and didn't feel so worn out when I left. I actually looked forward to coming back to work the next day, because I was hoping to work with him again.
I remember working with him one night, and we were talking about the relationship I was in with Chad. I remember complaining because things weren't going too well. I was always being told that he was cheating on me. I always stuck by him (that's just the kind of person I am ) and defended him saying that he wasn't. I honestly believed what I was saying because the stories they told never seemed right, mainly because I was with him when they were saying he was with someone else. (Honestly, I never really figured out if any of that was true...he still denies it, so I trust that he wouldn't lie about it 2 years later...he is the forgetful type…but that is not the point.) I also talked with him about how my once "best friend" kept saying that she was seeing *my* boyfriend. I asked him what he thought I should do, because I really trusted his opinion...a quality that still exists today. I don't even remember what his advice was at this point, and I don't think it ever really mattered what he said to me to begin with. I just liked the fact that he listened to me. I think that was really all that I was asking for.
After that night, I don't think I had the chance to work in his department again, but we usually found each other at work pretty often to catch up on things.
I found out that I was going to be in Miss Winter Sports again (it is sort of like Homecoming). I didn't want to be lame and get my dad to escort me again, so I got up the courage to ask him...and he said yes! I was so excited!!
The night finally came...boy was I nervous. My friend and I picked him up and brought him back to my house so that he could meet my parents. We stayed at my house for a few minutes while I got some last minute things done, then we headed out to my school. I saw lots of my friends and tried to be polite and talk to them, but I knew that he didn't know anyone there, so I wanted to include him without making him feel uncomfortable. We took pictures and then it was time for the big event. No, I didn't win, but I still had fun...mainly because I was there with him.
Afterwards, I went home and changed, and then we (my friend, me and him) went to McDonald's to grab something to eat. (Oh I know what you are thinking...so romantic, but we had fun, so that's all that matters.) I felt bad because he was still dressed up, but he didn't seem to mind. We sat there and joked around a bit. Well, guess who came in the door?! My ex, Chad. What a way to ruin a good time. We had broken up by then, but there were still those feelings for him deep down inside. I almost felt as if I had been caught cheating, although obviously I wasn't. I remember being told by my date that my face went white. I mean, I was in the middle of a sentence when he walked in, and I just got really quiet. I just stared at him, and everyone followed my gaze to see who I was looking at. He was nice enough not to ask what was going on, but I sort of half way clued him in on it anyways. After a minute or so (I guess after the shock of seeing him again) I was ok, and we just continued talking and joking around until we were all ready to go home.
By now, I really had a huge crush on him but was still too chicken to say anything to him. I thought there was the possibility that he liked me, but I still wasn't completely sure. I just didn't want to be turned down.
I remember taking the pictures to work for him...I promised I would give him half. Everyone there wanted to see them. That's when I found out about his relationship. I was kind of shocked because I never remembered hearing him say anything about her. But, I wasn't completely turned away from him because they didn't say much good stuff about her, so I assumed that things must not have been going too well...boy doesn't that sound mean?
I eventually lost my job, so I didn't see him very often after that. We lost touch and I honestly never thought I would hear from him again. I moved on and eventually found a new guy, but I always wondered what happened to him, and the feelings I had for him never went away either.
Out of the blue, just past my birthday this year, he emailed me. What a birthday present it was now that I look back on it. It was so weird because my friend and I were talking about him just days before he emailed me. I was so excited to hear from him. We tried to catch up in as little time as possible, and we both kind of made a point to say that we were single. We kind of flirted a bit, and he finally told me he liked me. Get this, he liked me back when we worked together. Stupid me, if only I had said something! I told him that I liked him and that I even had a crush on him before, too.
That was about 4 months ago (I think) and now we talk every day. We both knew we had strong feelings for each other, so we agreed that we wanted to be in a relationship. Within a few weeks, we knew it was love. He told me he loved me and I almost cried. I've had people say that they love me, but it never seemed like they really meant it (I mean I thought they did, but now I kind of know they didn't, or else not as much as they made it out to seem like). It was different with him, I just knew that he meant it. And when I told him I loved him, I know he knew I meant it too. That is just the greatest feeling in the world, to know that someone really loves you, and that someone *must* be someone other than your parents.
He is truly the nicest and sweetest guy I have ever met, and he really means the world to me. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost him. I've never been as happy as I am with him. I just don't even really know how to begin to explain it! I just know what I feel in my heart, and I know what he tells me that he feels, and that's all that matters. He has even hinted about how he thinks that I am *the one* for him, and that makes me the happiest person alive because I feel the same way.
It's hard for people to understand how I feel because we are pretty far apart...me in NC, him in NY, and I haven't seen him in about a year and a half. But like I said, I know what I feel in my heart, and that is what helps get me through. Unfortunately now he is away fighting for our country. I understand why he is there, and I respect him for taking on this big task, so I am ok with that. I know he is ok, and I know he will come back home safely, but there will always be that part of me that worries about him. He is afraid that now I will leave him because of the situation, but I won't. I just can't get him to understand that. I care more for him now that I ever have before. The feelings will never go away, they will just continue to grow. I just look forward to when he gets home so that we can definitely find out for sure if what we have is real.
*UPDATE*
We'll, here's my update. Things didn't work out with the above mentioned person, but that's ok. I'm sure that I'll meet that perfect someone one day. Wish me luck!
Casey