The Hangover Haven
Created | Updated Jul 28, 2002
Entering through a dark and dimly lit passage way, you arrive in a dark but not at all depressing bar like place. Around you are numerous couches and comfy armchairs in shades of brown and black (if black had shades). Towards the back of the room are futons (because beds are to expensive) installed with a number of slumbering forms
who staggered in after a particularly intoxicating drink at Bar Bacchus.
A small silver robot scurries underfoot, whistling happily to itself in a manner only a robot could when given the task of cleaning up vomit. Lurking in a corner a teleporter with a black curtain is ready and willing to return any one to the Musehome or Bar Bacchus.
In the centre of the room a circular bar will provide you with whatever you desire whether it be a hangover cure, further intoxication or extra strong coffee to sober up again. Though a far better range of intoxication can be found at Bar Bacchus and far better coffee anywhere in the universe. Behind the bar , your host is situated with a bar towel in hand on a black and white stripy stool.
"Welcome, Welcome all, feel free to show your happiness in any way you wish, the drinks are free, if not disgusting but are all proven to cure any possible hangover you may have (even those HANGOVERS that make you feel like death microwaved for 30 seconds on high!). Don't be inhibited, feel free to vomit anywhere you wish, the cleaner robot is happy to clean up any accidents. We also do towels to order just name your size and design and one will be whisked up in a jiffy. Very handy for the stagger home. My own bar towel is a classic DON'T PANIC in black and white stripes. Who has also decided to become sentiant and wants it's own page.
Don't feel you have to be drunk to enter here, all are welcome and drunken musings are some of the most enlightened in the universe. The teleporter I would recommend to anyone as it has the curious ability to heighten a persons state of drunkenness. Definitely a must for all heading to Bar Bacchus. Also don't worry if you don't see me often just help yourself but leave an imaginary note on the corkboard to the left of my cryogenic chamber, which is where I sleep and keep my more potent potions. Though hopefully there should be other bar persons in the near future other than Cupid Stunt who has his own line of gin inspired drinks.
Plus come along to the food fight at the bar, but anyone throwing cheesecake or chocolate milk will be removed. Date to be set.
Hangover cures
| Raw egg whisk (with added shudder) | Well known hangover cure, unfortunately it relies on emptying the stomach of all alcohol. |
| Boiling Brew | Very tasty and effective cure, however it has to be drunk at 100°C. At which temperature it would burn away any taste buds and anything else it comes into contact with. |
| Procrastinators Pep up | For all those hardened procrastinators. It never goes off so can be put off as often as you want. |
| The Ultra Vitamin (pick me up) | Drinkable mixture of vitamins A,B,C and E. Not only will it cure most hangovers but it will ensure good health for a whole week. |
| Anti-Alcohol filter | Cure of all hangovers but will also make sure you stay sober all week. Great for social drinkers. |
| Rakun's special cure | Ingredients are a secret but it served with a complimentary slice of cheesecake. |
Alcohol
| Cupid Stunt's 'It all fits!' conspiracy pink gin | A drink that conspires to be something its not: i.e.- intoxicating. |
| Spanish resort Gin fizz | Fizzy gin created by Cupid Stunt in his handicraft class (Chemistry was taken up with personal matters). |
| Molecular Disrupter | Alcoholic beverage which has no effect until the consumer has used the teleporter. Great for those looking for a hard night at Bar Bacchus. |
Hangover food
| Starch stew | Strained bread and potato stew, bland and easy to digest but for added flavour choose from our range of complimentary sauces. |
| Sunday lunchtime fried bonanza | Weekly event designed to humiliate all persons under the influence of a hangover. A strong stomach is recommended. |
| Chocolate milk and cheesecake | Self explanatory divine sustenance. |
(Sauces include Tomato, Mayonnaise, Strawberry, Butterscotch and Chocolate.)
Ps. Any ideas for a new name would be much obliged.
Your host The Black Racoon (Member of SATS, Muse of Towels and dragon lore)
