h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Either you have never lived East Cowes, or you are blind and have no sense of smell.
My non-east-cowes-resident friends tell that they think East Cowes should be flooded,blown up, or generally attacked until it's gone. I am inclined to agree with them.
No matter how hard you try to be patriotic, loving yout town is just too difficult when it smells, is dirty and has more nuts in it than a Snickers bar.
It is not so much neglected as a taboo subject. It's like cow dung. Everyone knows it exists, but no one likes to talk about it. At long as it isn't near them, they ignore the fact it exists and concentrate on more pleasent areas of life, such as the cows themselves, or Cowes itself as far as this case is concerned.
It's funny when tourists come here by mistake though. You see them get all excited at the floating bridge ('Isn't this exciting Daniel?'), and then you see the look of horror on their faces as they step into the council tip/the town centre. It's not their fault. They only went for a ride on the bridge, but ended up in a war zone.

Hmmm.... I take it East Cowes isn't your favourite part of the Island, then?
I admit that yes, I haven't lived in East Cowes itself, but I used to live in Cowes before living in Sandown, and frankly I wasn't that impressed with Cowes - especially in the Summer when it's taken over by the RYS-types. East Cowes always seemed a more peaceful and relaxing place, with enough shops to be self-sufficient, but not too far away from Cowes, or even Newport or Ryde.

Admittedly, it's not exactly the most attractive part of the Island. There are no Koans or works of art, just an awful lot of Brick factories about the place. But it's not as bad as everyone says it is. True, I prefer living in Sandown (who wouldn't?) but if people decided to make an effort it would be a much better place. The only thing that, say, Ventnor has that East Cowes hasn't is the sea-front. East Cowes has an awful lot of room for potential.

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We have a seafront. You just have to wade through the filth to get there.
We have ENOUGH shops to be 'self-sufficient', they just aren't the right types. We have many many shops which sell different forms of booze, but no shops which sell books. What does that tell you about the residents?
Cowes is OK to visit, but Cowes week is hell. I have a deeply ingrained hatred of yachties, which they have done everything in their power to justify over the past few years. I have, several times been refered to as that inferior breed, the local. Technically I am, but does the term have to be accompanied by a sneer.
And I know I moan about East Cowes, the floating bridge etc, but that doesn't give the yachties a right to. There is nothing more annoying than hearing them rabbit on about how nasty the place is.
There. I've had my moan. And despite all that I guess East Cowes is OK. Sometimes.

Hmmm... You have a point about the lack of book shops - I've bought a few books in the charity shops there, but there are no new bookshops. But then, there aren't any new ones in Sandown either - just a second-hand run-from-home book place, and Pickwick Paperbacks left Shanklin a couple of years ago... The Island doesn't seem to have that many bookshops outside Ryde, Newport or Ventnor.

I've avoided Cowes during Cowes Week since I stopped living there - I've never been a yachtie-type, I enjoy swimming in the sea, and have spent a couple of summers trying to learn how to surf, but that's about it. I don't know - I just feel that East Cowes has a charm to it. I like all the towns on the Island (although Cowes the least) and I just felt that I should write something about East Cowes.

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Cowes does have a Beatles cafe though, which in my book is a redeeming point.
There are some nice bits about East Cowes.
Omigod, I said two nice things at once!
I think I'm going to spontaneousely combust

Ah yes - Octopus's Garden. And Cowes has got a good chippy.
So it isn't as bad as all that, but isn't my favourite bit of the Island by all means.

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