h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The most important function of neckties is surely to denote the wearer as belonging to a non manual class of worker. You try doing a prctical job wearing one and see how far you get. Even the office shredder poses a threat, let alone the fan blade on a car engine.
One of the exceptions to this rule is the doctor, who may well have complex manual tasks thrust at him whilst still wearing the badge of learning around his neck. This can lead to the awkwardness such as the apochryphal tale of the surgeon who catches his finely printed silk tie on the end of his sigmoidoscope, a 12inch long metal tube used for inspecting the lower bowel of patients unfortunate to have complained of symptoms there, just at the point of entry to the rectum. The tale requires the cool man to turn to his assistant and say"Sister would you pass me the scissors please?" She complies and of course the great man, (for women grow their fingernails and wear jewellry to denote high social status)skilfully cuts off the soiled tie and proceeds with the task in hand.
Personally I just try and tuck the tie into my shirt before risking any catastophe such as the above.