I had written most of a novel on that thing and I had all kinds fun using the paint program, which I thought was pretty cool. Since all I had was an old printer, I was happy just drawing in black and white.

A few years later, in 2001, I paid to have a computer built for me by a student at a local college who claimed that he knew how to build a better computer than Micheal Dell. I paid him five hundred dollars down and five hundred on completion. I have never regretted it, although dozens of people have called me a fool. I have seriously learned to hate Windows 98, and Office 2000, and, well, you know what I mean.

Anyway, I don't know how I managed at all when I first got the damned thing set up. I named the CPU Ruffio for a character in the "Hook" movie. Someone told me about H2G2 and I signed on for the first time within about a week of gaining internet access. Ladies and gentlemen, I did not have a clue what I was doing. My earliest posts are not only those of a newbie but of an aspie who is swimming without a flotation device in a sea of sharks and reefs.

I learned most of what I know about using computers from this site. I cannot tell you how long it took me to learn to cut and paste. Of course, it didn't help that many of the people who were telling me didn't know just how basic an instruction level I required.

For years, I spent hours on this site. Sometimes as much as half a day. It didn't hurt that I was a trifle unemployed for part of that time... But I truly became addicted. On my days off of work sometimes I would neglect family and hygiene and spend all my waking hours online.

I learned to use the site and the web through action. I was one of the founding members of AGG/GAG, which is now known as the CAC. Many was the time that I threw together an issue at the last minute and tossed it to Shazz, the then editor of the Post.

I threw together a gag guide entry after a couple years and soon saw myself in the Edited Guide, much to my surprise and other's shock. Then somehow I found the wit and wherewithall to commit serious guiditry and have two real entries to show for it. I did have a rather spectacular failure PR-wise with my Buddy Holly entry, but I was going through a bad patch with my wife leaving me and all at that time. There are also a half-dozen false starts littering my entry list, most of which I can't even remember.

On top of all this other magnificence, I began to do this feature column, which began as a series of fake radio shows on a non-existent network called Irritating Public Radio. I used scripts that I had originally written for the real KOOP radio station in Austin, Texas but were never aired nor recorded because of a personality difference between me and the universe.

Then, a couple years ago, the opportunity arose and hit me in the face to commit cartoons to the Post and thus Platypus Dancing were born.

All in all, this site has been more of a home to me over the years than any family or town. Thanks, Girls and Guys!

And a big Hello to the guy who made Marvin a household word and the Nutrimatic Machine just as dirty a word as Belgium, our own Sir Douglas Adams, DM (dearly missed)