h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Got a cheap bit of steak? Want to really make it nice?

Marinate in sunflower oil overnight - you really need to cover the meat in a deep dish.

Sprinkle some garlic, herbs of your choice, pepper into the marinade.

Flash Grill the night after (medium rare at most).

et Voila - you'd swear you purchased the most expensive piece of steak in the store.

P.S not to be pendantic but,......it's vegetables, not vegatables.

Ooppss... sorry, my bad spelling coming through there...
I'll definately have a try at that one.....
or rather, make my mother do it.....

now this may sound odd but try it and you will find it quite good....
mix mustard and worsheshire sauce together in a bowl...the amount for each is personal preference, normally one part worsheshire to two parts mustard depending on your taste.....
brush this mixture onto both sides of the steak (any cut will do for this as it holds in the moisture quite well).....
fire up the grill and get it good and hot....
place steaks on the grill and cook to your preference of done....this does best for a rare to medium cooked steak....
everytime you turn the steak brush on more of the mixture until the final turn which is left un-brushed in order to seal it....
remove from the grill and serve with baked potatoe, green onions and a side salad
monsy

Excuse me? *GREEN* Onions? Side salad? That's not what we do with steaks.

However, a quick trip to your home page confirms that you are a) female, and b) someone's mother, so there's probably no point arguing. So therefore...

Yes, I think a side salad is a good idea. Look, I've finished the whole thing. My plate is so clean you wouldn't know I'd eaten from it. I didn't throw anything in the dustbin while you were on the phone. Honest. Can I have some ice cream now please?

One of the more famous steakhouses in NY (Peter Luger's) serves steak with sliced tomatos and sliced raw onions. Interesting.

In the "cooking tips" category, I've always been partial to pan-frying. Use a heavy cast-iron skillet and about a tablespoon of butter for one steak. 3 minutes per side over medium-high heat is pretty rare, 6 minutes per side for medium-well.

And one ought to also mention the practice of "crusted steaks": coating the steak with either peppercorns or roquefort cheese is quite popular in high-end steakhouses in the USA.

PS - Is it too much to ask that the editors USE A SPELLCHECKER? The word is "tastier". Sigh. I realize this is a basically democratic place but must that mean a complete lowering of standards?

i have found that pan frying is a good way to do a cheap cut of beef
it is especially good if you add green onion tips along with mushrooms, garlic and a dash of salt and pepper to the skillet.
monsy

If you place a pound of steak in a pint glass, it makes a relatively cheap and quite effective fake vagina. I wouldn't recommend cooking the steak afterwards, though.

One of the best ways to have a steak:

Subtlety between rare and medium rare, then covered in bloody Mary butter.

One of the best way for a man to get back to his primeval instincts (yeah, like we need to do that, huh?):

Get the biggest steak you can find.
Quality doesn't matter.
Heat grill to thermonuclear.
Blazing scorch one side, then quickly flip and burn the other leaving the middle raw.
Cover in ketchup and devour with fingers only.
Don't wait for it to cool. Make sure those fingers get a good burnin'.
Large amounts of garlic are optional for the primeval connoisseur

Adz, you are absolutely 100% spot on, there is NO other way to prepare a steak, just simply no other way. FINAL!

I myself prefer a quality cut of meat, such as prime grade. Choice is leaner, for those of you not wanting the supreme marbelizing texture of prime meat. The better cut of meat, the less it needs--just a dash of salt and pepper and it's own juices, though other spices and marinating are optional. I grew up on evil horrible cube steaks, which you have to pound the snot out of with a mallet even to be able to chew it, splattered with ketchup or A-1 sauce. Fortunately, my tastebuds advanced and I am able to buy my own meat now and not rely on my mother's coupon binging. Also, if you don't want to piss off the chef at a good restaurant, never order your steak more done than "medium", though consider when ordering it medium, you will usually get medium-rare. If you hate the chef or the succulent juiciness of a bloody slab o meat, order it well done (just say "reduce it to charcoal, please"). That will hopefully get you an unchewable black brick garnished with a sprig of parsley. -WW

I am a chef and i can only agree with the comment on how best to annoy when ordering a steak.
I don't eat steak myself, but beleive that if you want the taste of dead cow it is best served chewable (ie anything other than well done).

If one would rather the taste of charcoal, it would be easier and considerably cheaper (though not as good for the wellbeing of your tongue) to remove a coal from your fire and suck on it. For those with gas or electrical heating, pushing your tongue against the element would no doubt bring similar sensations.

Not to be pedantic, but it's pedantic, not pendantic.

Aha, you obviously didn't pick up on the implied humour inherent in that post. By pointing out a spelling mistake in a pedantic type mood, and deliberately spelling the word pedantic to pendantic, I think I fully expressed my charming wit and humour in the exact expression required without using a smilie.

Subtle, wasn't it?

Ok, ok, truth be told, I made a mistake! Sorry! I'll try to proof read next time, ok?

Happy?

Very.

That's sounds bloody gorgeous, and not dissimilar to my own special steak sauce, which is akin to BBQ sauce in taste but sweeter (and better, in my opinion): A dash of Worcestershire sauce, a dash of soy sauce, a heaped teaspoon of mustard (English, not French, and definitely not Poxyamerican) and a dash of Jamaican hot sauce (or Tabasco will do); for the BBQ-esque flavour add a restrained amount of tomato ketchup (don't overdo it, or it will taste rather ordinary). Mix that lot up in advance so that you can add it liberally during the cooking of the steak, which should be flash-fried for 30 seconds each side, then the temperature reduced to medium and the steak cooked for a further 2 minutes per side (3 if you must, but no more). Sprinkle with ground black pepper and serve with something absorbent - mashed potato or rice for preference - so's you can get all of that luvverly sauce!