Through the Doughnut Hole
Created | Updated Nov 6, 2003

... and now ladies, gentlemen and others, please put your hands, paws, fins,
goinks1 together for another
Through the Doughnut Hole!!!!
Put Your Left Foot In
Welcome again good readers to another edition of the virtually infamous Doughnut Hole. Did we all make it through Hallowe'en alright? Did you get scared by any nasty Ghoulies lurking on your
doorstep? Did you notice any particular bewitching things going on? Just wondered... as several strange creatures appeared outside the Lair, looking a trifle soggy and bedraggled due to in some part... the squalid weather2. I 'treat'ed them all the same... and each in turn got a bucket of jelly and ice cream thrown at them. Shame really that it was so wet, the dessert soon was washed off as
they scurried away, gibbering with fright, off up the lane. Maybe one year they will get the idea through their impish little minds that I don't like to be threatened with tricks... or treats come to
that... and will decide not to turn up at my door... I live eternally in hope.
Okay, enough of whimsical remembrances and on to last times question, here's a reminder of what it
was.
Have you ever been caught out 'pulling a
sicky' (having a day off work/school and telling a lie about the reason3)?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My first guest this week is a beguiling creature of fey folklore, she is kind, considerate, and quite
the most charming person to meet as I am sure you will agree when you greet her, it is of course Titania who started this conversation.
'No, I haven't been caught out. I'm not sure why, but people tend to believe me no
matter what lame excuse I come up with...'
But who would ever think to not believe you about anything Titania my love, and for you to not
realise how completely trustworthy you appear makes you even more charming to behold.
~~~~~~~~~
My second guest on this weeks show is none other than the infinitely green fingered Frenchbean, who in the same conversation said....
'I'm with Titania. As far as I know, I've never been sussed.
To be honest, throwing a sicky isn't something I do often, because whilst I convince myself beforehand
that it's a great idea - a whole day at home to chill out and relax- I'm
always disappointedly unchilled. My over-active sense of guilt kicks in big-time and I assume that I'm
going to be caught out any moment. I can't even go into the garden, in case
my neighbours look over the hedge and ask why I'm home. So I skulk inside wracked with guilt and am
totally relieved when I go back to work the next day. Mind you, then I have the horror of having to
fill in a sick form, because that's my usual excuse.
There are some people in this world who just can't lie, defraud anybody/thing or knowingly break the
law, because we KNOW that we'll be caught. Even though we never are
Don't get me wrong, I'm no(trust me on that), but being deceitful is just
toooooo hard.'
I totally agree Frenchbean, the truth is a much easier way to go about things... unfortunately
telling your boss that you can't go into work today because you just don't feel like it often leads to
some quite nasty work related situations... ~sigh~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My third guest this week is a very intelligent individual who is talented beyond his years. He likes
to dress up as a badger in his spare time and devotes most of his evenings to readings the works of
Terry Pratchett. Please make welcome Archangel Dr Justin in this
conversation
'No
Can't say I've ever pulled a sicky though, to be perfectly honest. I suppose the trick is to not put
yourself in a position where you're going to need (or want) to pull a sickie...'
Oh please do be honest, that's all I'm asking for ~grin~. What do you say St Serephina who is my fourth guest in the same conversation?
'Oh come on..'everyone' has at some time! Whether to escape the dreaded maths/p.e
lesson(I used to sneak in the loos at lunch time n pick a wire out of my braces so I’d have to have the
afternoon off to go the dentist among other tricks) or calling a hangover
'food poisoning' when you call in sick on a Saturday morning still half cut after a particularly heavy
night out.'
Ah that's more like it, though I think even I would twice about actually going to the dentist to get
me out of something I didn't want to do. In fact going to the dentist is something I don't even want to
think about!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My fifth guest this week has never yet said no to a slice of lemon wrapped around a gold brick. He
is at the moment suffering from a cold, so please excuse his drips and say hello to Deus Ex Machina in this conversation
'Hehe... actually this happened to me a week ago, it was the Tuesday after
Thanksgiving weekend and I realized I forgot to do my ULTRA-BIG ENGLISH ASSIGNMENT OF
DOOM!!! (that is worth 50% of the total term mark!) So, not knowing what to do, I fake a
stomach-ache
and tell my mom I'm sick. While my mom was out shopping, I completed the assignment on my computer.
'
Oh dear, I just hope that Shazz doesn't read this, sickies are very much frowned upon in the Post
Office you know!!! And this information may prejudice your application... though... I can put a few
good words in if you happen to send me a box or two of doughnuts... ~wink~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Put Your Left Foot Out
It's always good solving those little problems that perplex us isn't it, makes you feel better and
that all is right with the world. That is until you think up an entirely new question to perplex
yourself with, and the idea of having to think up a question to perplex yourself with is perplexing in
itself. So to save you the bother I shall come up with a new question for you to solve, or deliberate
over and maybe another article just like this one but with different words will spring forth from
The Post and onto your computer screens.
So today's question is... roll of drums...
what do you think should be written?
Example...
- NAME: Your name here
- DESCRIPTION: Your description for the guide here
Of course you can also enter into any of the conversations featured on this page.
Shake It All About
Well that's it then... off to a Firework display now, I wouldn't normally go, but the invite did say
that hot doughnuts would be available. Who could resist???
This weeks article is brought to by The Post and a small wet child with an empty treats bag.
Share and Enjoy!!
Through the Doughnut Hole
Archive
died / Granny's funeral / Transport broke down / Hidden behind a hedge so the school bus never
stopped to pick you up4 etc. etc.4I of course never did this.. I am just making these excuses up for
your benefit!!!