h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Bank Holidays in Scotland are a tad weird. For instance, we just had one yesterday (the last weekend of September). That is, Glasgow had one. Where my parents live, down in Ayrshire, I believe they had their bank holiday two weeks ago. Also, there wasnot one in England, thus the telly didn't change. Of course, when the English had one in the middle of August (for the traditional start of their two week summer holiday) all the telly got changed, confusing the hell out of me as always.
What I am saying (badly) is that English bank holidays do not correspond to Scottish bank holidays, which in themselves do not correspond. This a) annoys banks, who have to run a system over the whole of the UK and b) those in Scotland who can't watch the holiday telly, which only follows English holidays.
We can, however, be smug about the fact that different bits of Scotland have different holidays on different days. This allows the roads to be a little less busy over a longer period. Also, we get holidays all through the summer, known as fairs. Kilmarnock Fair is the first two weeks of July, Glasgow Fair is the second two weeks and Edinburgh Fair is the first two weeks of August. I don't know when the other ones are round the country. Each of these "fairs" begins with a bank holiday in their respective catchment areas during whcih everyone naffs off somewhere better.
As to Rememberance Sunday, I have never heard of this called a Holiday. Nobody celebrates several million dead men round here.

Well that was an incoherent ramble, must go lie down.

Replying to my own message! Anyway, At no point during the "Fair Fortnight" is there a fair/fayre/fete. What would be the point, as everyone is in Benidorm anyway?