h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It sits in the store refridgerators mostly because the common public doesn't know what to do with the mysterious liquid. But vanilla flavored soy milk turns out to be an outstanding addition to french toast. It also turns out that soy milk has a much longer "shelf life," so if you travel for a living, you don't come home to clompy milk.
If you are looking for another use for soy milk, it probably replaces regular milk in several recipes. Just make sure you don't drink a large amount of it. Large gulps appear to cause some kind of nervous system shutdown. Minutes after consuming a large amount, you will find yourself on your kitchen floor wondering how you got there. It doesn't appear to cause any damage, unless you hit your head on the floor tiles on the way down.
If you refuse to buy soy milk, at least try adding a dab or two of vanilla to your egg-milk mixture. And be sure to treat yourself to some REAL maple syrup once in a while. You deserve it.