h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm becoming an expert on weddings - I got married myself, I have daughters, and I ring bells at weddings most Saturdays through the summer. Herewith some observations on cars:

If you have a stretch limo with dark glass then no-one will see you as you drive to the church and you won't be able to wave goodbye as you drive away from the church.

An open car looks good but will muss the bride's hair en route to the church.

An open car will have to have the hood up if it rains. Insist on sitting in the car with the hood up before you hire it - some are very cramped.

A little old car is picturesque but it's painfully slow. Get a new car or a big car if you've got to travel more than a couple of miles.

Horse-drawn is romantic but messy. (Especially if you step in "it" just before you enter the church).

Consider the diameter of the bride's dress and the height of the hair before picking the car.

Ask the wedding car people to guarantee a fallback provision if "your" car fails to arrive or to start. And have your own private backup in case they really let you down.

Get the wedding car to the bride's house at least 30 minutes before you need to depart. Until you've been there you've no idea how long it can take to get one (tearful) bride and one (haggard) father out of the house.

The very best wedding car I've seen was a Type 2 VW bus. Plenty of space. Big sliding door. Big windows. And high off the floor so you get a good view.

A good friend of mine, who got married last year, used a white Series III Land Rover as her wedding car. Her dress wasn't too full of crepe or net skirts so getting in and out of it was fairly easy. Her reasoning was that stretch limos are a bit passe these days and hey, why not be different?

Good for her. We see a wedding each weekend and we're getting fed up with the regular cars. The favoutite options seem to be a ten-year-old Rolls or Daimler, a sixty-year-old Austin, or a stretch limo. I'd love to see a 50's Chevvy or a bubble car but a Landy would be equally welcome.

When my niece was married she hired 2 red VW convertables (she wore a (very) short dress) from a local hire car company. They were picked up in the morning and returned later that night. The only problem was getting a couple of friends to drive them. No time limits and much, much cheaper than going for 'Wedding Cars'.

That sounds pretty cool and a way to arrive in style. I think for any wedding the vehicle should allow a degree of individuality, style, and eye-catching ability.

I think my other half, if he ever got round to marriage that is, would want us to turn up to the church in a tank or a JCB digger.

I did hear of someone from work some years ago who managed to borrow a Range Rover for "development purposes" for a weekend and, in fact, used it for his daughter's wedding! He did get quite a telling off, apparently, as it shouldn't have been photographed but it was...

No problem with the breach of security. Wedding photos are so soft focus and arty that you wouldn't be able to tell a Range Rover from a Rolls Royce.

Very true! But I think he got a kicking for the luck of the thing. Besides, I don't know of that many people who've had their wedding car in the actual photos, unless the photographer is a car nut.

Don't forget the classic photo of the couple in the car looking out the back window. The Bride is also often photographed getting out of the car on arrival.

On the other hand you could always go, like Trudy Styler, and arrive on a horse!

I thought we planned it quite well (naturally)!

The people living next door to the church, who are friends, offered their living room for bride and bridesmaids to change in, so no need of transport to church.

Best man booked two taxis - one for bride and groom, one for attendants - to get to reception. Guests who knew London made their own way there, but for the rest we hired a double-decker London bus and asked the driver not to get them there too quickly. He gave them a one-hour tour of central London which many people said was one of the best bits of the day!

Another taxi to the hotel at the end (slightly complicated by the fact the driver claimed never to have heard of it).

The groom's parents paid for the bus as their gift to us, so it didn't cost too much at all!