This is a Journal entry by fluffykerfuffle

In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 1

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
smiley - erm
i just found out


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 2

kuzushi


Is he the guy who jumps on your merry go round?


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 3

bobstafford

I am sorry to here that fluffy, love is hard enough sometimes without that sort of thing to deal with. smiley - cuddle


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 4

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
yes he is the guy who has been pushing my merry-go-round but he hasn't jumped on yet... which is fine... we are at the flirty stage right now... smiley - smiley

thanks smiley - hug but yes bobby... it is sad and i am only now recovered enuf from the initial shock to be finally be able to reach out and begin to try to solve the problem smiley - smiley

maybe this should go into Ask?


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 5

kuzushi


I'd suggest you should try to get out of it for your own good.
My wife's dad was an alcoholic.

Are you sure he is one?



http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/live_text/default.stm


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 6

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
smiley - rofl hilarious... i just thought of something...

if he tries to jump on my merry-go-round when he has been drinking... he probably won't be able to stay on... . . smiley - wow ... ... ... smiley - wah


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 7

kuzushi


He might not be able to get off either.


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 8

bobstafford

Fluffy this could be a long hard road. It matters if you love him and are prepared for a long battle with his adiction, but it will be devastating if he fails to love you enough to save himself. And dont forget we are here and care so keep us informed.smiley - erm


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 9

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
um... smiley - erm i clicked that url and got a BBC football site... er um is that a symptom of alcoholism? smiley - rofl

no i am not sure... but there is a problem.... i do not like one-sided conversations... ie when only one person is sober enuf to remember the conversation the next day...


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 10

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
okay bobby... yes i realise that and thank you for saying it so clearly because it will help me to remember...

i am not an enabler... and i think i do love him... and i love me... and i love US... and my impetus to solve the problem whatever it might be is ...really... to save US... this wonderful thing that happens between us ...its mmmmsmiley - magic

also... i have an addiction too... nicotine... maybe he and i can strike up a deal... not necessarily to quit but to not indulge in our addictions whilst around each other...

i for one am not at all interested in smoking while around him smiley - smiley so that is a start of sorts... at this end anyway...


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 11

kuzushi


No, I just want to be able to keep track of the score while posting here. Man U are going to have to be careful with just a 1-nil lead.


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 12

kuzushi


You talk about solving the problem.
How do you propose to do that? By curing him?

And how did you learn he was an alcoholic?


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 13

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
>>>He might not be able to get off either.<<<

smiley - roflsmiley - wow ... ... ... smiley - erm my fear also smiley - wah


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 14

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
well... asking here is one way i am trying to solve the problem... getting information on how it all works... i have had little experience with alcoholism... in the past, i havent spent time with drinkers cuz i don't as i said enjoy relationships where only one person is aware of what is going on....

also... no i don't think i can cure him... but i can maybe give him incentive or make an environment which is helpful to him helping himself.. and of course i would be glad to give him back rubs or whatever... smiley - wow ...to make his passage thru rough edgy times easier...

okay i am not sure he is an alcoholic... i just know, because of a conversation we had on the phone while he was drinking, that the next day he didnt remember everything he said in that conversation and that made me feel lonely...


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 15

kuzushi


<>



If you carry on like that I'll have to come and give you a hug.


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 16

bobstafford

Dear fluffy

If you are not sure he is be careful how you bring it up, you don’t need to be watching him all the time but there will be evidence.
You seem to love him enough to cope with this don’t jump to conclusions give him enough time to be sure that your suspicions sure correct.
Remember love is hard work in the early stages but the rewards are worth it, I do hope he is the one for you, I know you are a kind and decent woman so give it time be patient and be sure.

smiley - hug


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 17

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
smiley - cry oh gosh you guys... oh gosh.. thank you

and yes... no bringing up... i sensed that... more.. more like just never saying the A word but more like saying what i just said... that i feel lonely when he doesnt remember what he said or did... yes? addressing the situation not tagging it.


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 18

bobstafford

smiley - hug don’t cry I know it hurts be brave it is not likely to be as bad as it seems, things have a way of sorting themselves out.
You have evidence of a man who has had a drink and so forgetting a conversation, not it seems a man who is a habitual drinker.
At this time no more than a fool, the feeling of loneliness is evidence of your feelings you must feel rotten and let down. Now you must make him feel that he is the most fortunate of men (and he is you are lovely) turn up the heat of your relationship he will come round.

Remember ~~~ you either stop loving him or love him a whole lot more.


Trust me please it works I promise smiley - cheerup

I am here for you please call smiley - hug


In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 19

fluffykerfuffle

smiley - space
its funny... now that you mention it... i actually think i do love him a whole lot more already....

funny huh...

he was chagrined also with the whole thing...

okay i will trust you bobby

thank you

i will call i promise not to go off in a corner on this i will keep this up to date ...okay? smiley - hug

and i trust you all on this too... afterall this is a human thing... just one ramification of what we all suffer... aloneness kinda sorta



In Love With An Alcoholic

Post 20

bobstafford

Well fluffy you have the right attitude and that makes me feel more optimistic for you and the future of this romance.

Take this step by step and day by day you will be fine, if this works out for you can we come to the wedding smiley - smiley

All the very best of luck with this love is very complicated remember that. smiley - cuddle


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