h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

sat down had tea and I'd said I didn't want any pudding and I was going to start on the dishes.

No she says, we eat as a family. But all I'd be doing is sitting down doing nothing and having my time wasted, which I hate and she knows I dislike, so where's the problem with me doing the dishes? No, her house her rules, I have to stay, we eat as a family.

I went and did the dishes anyway, undoubtedly she'll try and tell me off later but I don't see what grounds she has for telling me off. Instead of being sat down doing all, I went and got on with the dishes and made everyones life a bit easier. It's not like I went outside and knifed a pensioner. Her argument of we eat as family etc etc doesn't really hold up, for the 2 or 3 minutes that I wasn't there I'm sure the whole world wont have collapsed in my absence.

I have said to here before that I dislike having my time wasted and she said she'd that she'd let me go sometimes and try to reach a compromise. I thought that when she said it it wouldn't last, and I was proved right. There's not much point talking to her about it as she'll just do the same thing again, promise something and then not do it.

I can't even try and have a conversation with her about it cos as soon as I make a point that she doesn't like she just blanks it out/ tells me I'm getting angry and sends me away. She should be a politician. I can't wait to leave. Only a year and a bit.

And she gets so stressy at meal times. When were having a a laugh and a joke she'll tell us to be quiet. This is the "family time" thats meant to be so important and yet we can't mess around and have a bit of fun unless she says so. Everything has to be done on her rules.

It's not that I don't appreciate what she does but surely making a compromise and sticking to it wouldn't kill her.

It's such a difficult thing. I like us to sit down and have a meal, all together, and have a family chat. But eventually it will descend into the Gruesomes annoying each other followed by me or getting cross at them.

It seems to be important for your mum though - could you try it for her a bit more? I think your brother is younger? You're at the age where she's probably realising that you won't be her "children" for much longer. You have no idea what kind of a painful realisation that is.

Most of the time I do sit there and stay even if I'm not having anything, which is why when I do want to leave once in a while I don't see why she makes such a fuss. If it was every day then I could see her point a bit more.

This is the first time I've done it since Christmas, probably before but I can't remember back that far.

Both my brothers are younger, my sister is older.

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But trying to force me into doing something that I don't want to do isn't going to make me stay a child for any longer.

I know there are reasons why she wants us to have meals together but most of my friends parents don't do that, they let their kids get food etc when they want, rather than trying to force them to follow self-imposed rules. A bit of freedom never hurt.

It's not like my mum was perfect when she was kid, from what I've heard she was worse than me, at school and at home. So I don't get how she can get so surprised/ annoyed when I don't want to do what she wants me to do or when I don't want to follow her rules, it just seems a bit too hypocritical. I know that kids/teens aren't perfectly behaved, but when she wasn't perfect I'd expect her to not get quite so annoyed when I do something that doesn't fit with what she wants.

It's my life, a point I feel she doesn't get, and sometimes I'd quite like to do thing my way, most of the time I can accept that it's not practical for thigs to be done how I'd like but the rest of the time it's not going to kill her to accept that there are different ways of doing things.

IMO being a kid is about breaking rules and having fun not blindly doing what mummy tells you, I'm not sure she sees it that way.

If it makes you feel any better I can see both sides of the "argument". And I was the teenager from hell. Probably you won't ever understand until you're in the same position with kids of your own at this age, and by that time most of us have forgotten what it's like to be a teenager. (some of us, however, never really got past 17...)

The only solution is to try to talk about it and try to get her to see your pov - but I think we both know it's probably just going to carry on like it is.


But... and here's the mum in me coming out: just because that's what your friends' parents do doesn't mean to say you all have to do it too.

My parents can randomly swing into being very aggressive towards their kids, however they would probably be more impressed that i was doing dishes without so much as a complaint.

Given how much parents can vary from family to family I can't really suggest ideas, and don't want to annoy people by saying how families shouldsolve problems.

Ah parents... who'd want to be one!


Each family has to find their own way, really. Often we swear that we will do the exact opposite of what our parents do/did - but actually when you get there you sometimes see that they didn't have much of a choice.

We're all different. That's what makes us all so great.

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I'll let you know what happens if I get there

I'll be a granny by then (perhaps) and all bets will be off.

Shock horror we did actually have a talk. Upshot of it, she'll let me miss a few meals but she's not happy about it. Ah well.

your mum sounds cool.

How do you know she's not me...

I've seen photos of you

hahah
now I know that's not true! I'm like a and can't be photographed...

See you can be photographed!

oh, go and tidy your room or something... you treat this place like a hotel

I did tidy my room today!

Very good. Now you can unload the dishwasher...

Don't have a dishwasher, I helped with the dishes though. Anything else?

you could make me a cup of tea if you like...