h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My daughter wants to have a proper photograph of Pam and myself so she arranged a date with a local guy, http://www.garywalsh.co.uk.
We arranged to meet at his studio and were greeted by a team of glaziers who were in the process of replacing the front windows which had been smashed by the friday night retards. His was one of many targetted by the drunken morons. We decided the Billingham ecology park would be an ideal location and in due course we set off to find suitable posing places. The wind was blowing and the temperature was dropping when Gary said, "Here's a good spot. Take off your coats and stand on the bridge." Like lambs we obliged and tried not to shiver as he implored us to look happy. "More happy!" We were allowed to put our top coats back on as we trudged around, stopping at different sites and dis-robing and posing as directed. As yet we have not seen the results, we have to choose the shots we like. I hope they don't show the effect the cold wind and trickling water was having on my bladder.