h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The jokes in this East-meets-Western (especially the Western in-jokes) are sometimes a little pedestrian, they all work well together to hit the right buttons. And fine comic work by Owen Wilson adds the same extra dimension as Chris Rock did in Rush Hour.

I found this a whole lot more enjoyable than Rush Hour. It kinda flowed more.

Is there a genre that Jackie Chan hasn't tried his hand at yet?

A Jackie Chan horror flick? Even with comic overtones, that might be cool! Maybe even a Chinese ghost story like the classic Big Trouble in Little China...

Steamy romance?

Actor plus animation combo (a la Roger Rabbit)?

Sci-Fi?

Tick that second one! Well, sort of. Jackie's next movie is apparently Stretch Armstrong, based on the cartoon secret agent.

That's another one I don't know.

Did you ever have that feeling that you're missing out on something?

Come to think of it, it does sound familiar. Was it a children's toy?

Yep, during the 70s, with limbs that could apparently stretch out to eight feet.

And the US Consumers Product Safety Commission is still demanding its recall, 20 years after they stopped making 'em.

So, it's elastic kung-fu, then!

Well, Shanghai Noon showed how good he is with rope weapons (although Jet Li may be better). And Bruce Lee once made the distinction between a kung fu punch and a karate punch: he said a karate punch was like an iron rod while a kung fu punch was more like an iron ball on a chain. With all the broken bones he's had, Jackie would seem the ideal choice to play an elastic man.

Jet Li is really quite interesting, though I'll be able to judge him better if Romeo Must Die ever reaches London. He seems quite intense. I guess much will depend on whether his acting talent develops beyond the usual kick-punch stuff.

I'm thinking hard, but can't recall anyone from martial arts whose acting ability gives them any real credit outside the world of fighting.

Like I say sometimes you gotta go with what you know. Most of these guys are near the top of their game. Jet Li for example has won gold in wushu (national Chinese competitions) several times. Acting, let alone directing or anything else, is pretty much secondary. Doesn't mean they aren't creative within their own frame of reference. Bruce Lee created a new martial art, as well as coming up with ideas for films and shows, such as the classic Kung Fu series, the very first East-meets-Western.

Wouldn't it be nice, though, to have a proper martial arts role with true depth of character?

Sooner or later, someone will arise who is excellent at both martial arts and acting.

By a strange inverse coincidence, I am not excellent at either!

There's a film I've heard of, that may be worth waiting for with bated breath. "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" got heaps of praise at this year's Cannes film festival. Starring Chow Yun-Fat and Michelle Yeoh, directed by Ang Lee - that alone tells me it's something I'd want to see.

I seem to remember watching an old film on TV called the Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires, or something like that. Horror combined with martial arts.

I missed the end of the film, so I'll never no what happened.

The vampire stuff I've been seeing lately seems to involve a lot of martial arts for some reason eg Blade, Buffy, From Dusk til Dawn, John Carpenter's Vampires...

So when you come back from the dead, you get a black belt?

Ooh, you've got me worried - do you think my instructor is one of the undead?