h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, we had the news today, and it's as bad as it can get. They can't treat the cancer. Normally they'd do surgery to remove it, but my mother-in-law is too old and her health isn't good enough. Basically, they don't think she'd survive the surgery, although they didn't actually say so.

The alternative would normally be chemotherapy (they don't use radiotherapy for stomach cancer). That's also not an option, because they think the drugs would make her very ill. They also reckon it would only add a few months to her life.

That leaves the 'do nothing' option. They'll give 'Mum' painkillers when the pain gets bad, but other than that, they'll let nature take its course. When the doctor started talking to 'Mum' and hubby, he initially said 3-4 months. He later said he hoped to get 'Mum' to her 80th birthday (June next year). That's just 8 months. Even with chemotherapy it would be no more than a year.

We had a holiday booked for the three of us in November, a cruise to Egypt. 'Mum' has been looking forward to it and still desperately wants to go. The doctor has said she shouldn't go, as there's less chance of her being promptly treated if anything goes wrong on board ship or on one of the excursions. (There's also a big question mark over whether the airline would carry her on the flight out and back, or whether the cruise company would have her on board ship as they have no way of dealing with things like internal haemorrhage, which can happen.) 'Mum' hasn't decided to cancel, yet, so hubby may have the job of persuading her not to go.

Hubby is in shock. I broke down and cried when he told me the news, and he ended up comforting me as much as me comforting him. 'Mum' drives me up the wall a lot of the time, but I always thought she'd die peacefully of old age. I thought she'd be around for a few more years. All we can do now is take things one day at a time and try to make her final months as enjoyable as we can.

I'm so sorry

sorry to hear that CD.