h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hmmm... welll... I'm not really into sports...

How did you do that? I know a lot of tricks, even a way to kickstart a bluescreen in win98, but which one did you use?

I've had a really terrible day... My we had to take my dog to the vet today, turns out she has pneumonia, I just hope she'll make it... she's so frail...

I went into the program setup for Windows and fiddled around with the settings until I achieved my goal. My actual goal was to knock out the color system but I failed. The error messages are so much more fun.

Oh, no! That's terrible. Poor thing, I hope she's fine. How did she get it, or is it just one of those things?

Ahh... I see...

Well, she seems fine, the vet said to call her if she wasn't well by tomorrow... that's usually as long as it takes to get rid of it... And we spotted it early enough, it seems... We're not sure yet... well... I suppose it's just one of those things...

Well, that's good. I'm glad she should/will be better.

I just found that my mother has played over 1000 games of Mae-Jong and only won 18 of them. How is that possible?

Yup, so am I... thanks

Hmmm? I'm not quite certain I know what Mae-Jong is... I have some vague idea of it being an oriental game played with square stones, or possibly cards... But anyway, if Mae-Jong is a game of strategy, then your mother must be a terrible srategist, if it's some sort of game of chance, then she's really unlucky...

You are correct. It is some Oriental game played with square tiles. It is not a game of chance, it's a matching game. Horrible.

So, how are you?

Yay! But still... that's some terrible statistics...

Well, I'm fine, I think... My dog seems to be recovering, I've had a fine day, but I'm beginning to suspect that my piano teacher hates me...

I didn't practice after the two first lessons, and now she seems thoroughly tired of me, even though I have practiced...
Well, got to go and have dinner...

I'm glad your dog is better. Our puppy just broke one of our dogs. She plays so rough and slammed our big dog against the wall and pulled a muscle in her back. Kind of funny when youthink about it.

Are you saying you're terrible at the piano? I'm pretty wretched. After two years I still can't play scales. I'm seriously impaired.

oh, that's horrid... Poor thing... but, at the same time, hahahaaaa...

Well, I'm not particularly good, I'll admit that, but the thing is, I just started taking lessons again after the summer, and the first to weeks, I didn't practice, so my teacher thinks I'm this kind of slobby no-doer, which I'm totally not... But yes, I'm not very good at the piano.

That's odd. I would have thought that percussionists would be more piano inclined, but I guess not. I'm absolutely wretched and fall of the stool and hurt myself. I think that I had better stay with reeded instruments for now. I think the accordion would be something fun to learn...

Why would you think that?
Most percussionists are terrible with notes (except the rythm)...
Anyway, all is relative... I'm not that bad, but in a class of 30 musicians, I'm certainly not the best one either...

I think I think that because most every percussionite I know knows how to play the piano. I am in awe of anyone who can actually PLAY the piano. My friend Bonnie is a great piano player as well as a great mallet player so maybe that's where it came from. The accordion or panpipes...

That's true, I should be better, I have marimba lessons ecery week... But I'm still terrible, though.

God, I can't stand panpipes... Or, that is, the incorrect usage of panpipes... such as in pop music. The worst is when they use a synth with panpipe-sound, though.

Marimbas are scary. One of my friends broke the instructors private marimba. Vibraphones are even worse...

I love panpipes, but when they are used in pop it's disgusting. What do they think it is? Some sort of 'folkie dolkie lets make this song cute' thing? Ergh...

Yup, I really don't like marimbas, but I still have to learn how to play them...

That's my point, panpipes can be great, but the way tis' been used... urgh...

Percussion means lots of things to learn. Saxophone means...lots of sleeping and happiness. I think I'll stick with squax for now!

Do I sense the anger?

Oh! Horrible news! Our bass player broke his upright!!

Strange, though, because percussionists are usually really lazy, and quite messy. They're the ones who always forget their notes... I still prefer percussion, though.

Oh yeah, it's related to the mandatory dancing lessons we had last year. We had to learn some horrible jazz-dance where they used loads of panpipes in a pop song, at really inappropriate places. I know you're a tapdancer, so I'm not certain you'll understand just how much I dislike dancing (because I'm terrible at it, obviously)...

No! That's horrible... Just what do you mean with upright? I'm a Norwegian, so that's a new word to me...

Did you perhaps mean upright bass? Isn't that hellishly expensive?
How did it happen?

I love dancing! Everyone can dance, but they must learn and love it to do it well.

I did perhaps mean upright bass. It was awful. He had just gotten done showing us his great spin moves (they were REALLYREALLY good!) and he leaned it on his shoulder to fiddle with his music and SMASH! He dropped the baby. Awful.

Well, maybe they can, but it takes more learning with some people... Like me... Anyway, It's just me, I don't dislike dancing, as long as I don't have to do it myself...

Awww... that's absolutely terrible... And uprights are so expensive too... Poor guy...