h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have just found out that, not only has my 'Keeper' status been confirmed, but a quote of mine has been used on the Keepers page!!

I must say I am genuinely shocked and thrilled that I have made a mark on the site already, in fact I was going to try to keep a low profile and just cruise around the place in stealth mode, chatting and mingling where and when I could, but this has been more than I ever contemplated.

I have to admit that I am a little embarrassed at the prominence of my quote and link to my space, but I will endeavour to have my space tidy at all times for those bored enough to drop in.

Thanks again for appointing me Keeper of Antidisestablishmentarianism.

(Internal Dialogue - Should I tell them that I was being pompous and sarcastic when I wrote those words and that I was only trying to entertain Mr Pimms? Nah, might hurt their feelings)

CURRENTLY REPESENTING THE ESTATE OF "MADHAMISH" WE (GOLDBERG, GOLDBERG AND GOLDFARB) FORMALLY REQUEST THAT YOU CEASE AND DESIST THE PRACTICE OF ENDING COMMUNICATIONS WITH A "BRACKETTED QUOTE". THIS PRACTICE IS THE SOLE INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY OF OUR CLIENT.
HAVE A NICE DAY.

IRA GOLDBERG
(GOLDBERG,GOLDBERG AND GOLDFARB-REPRESENTATION FOR THE FILTHY RICH)

Can't I be your girly sidekick??

Batgirl to your Batman, 99 to your 86,Trillion to your, well you get the idea. Havent you always wanted a girly sidekick of your very own????

j888
(continuing and keepingondoingit)

Strange. Hamish didn't object when I wrote comments. And he lives with another man (albeit Jeffrey)

Ms Jacqueline I advise you to turn his cattle prods back upon him, and be more egalitarian in his response to imitation, or he will end up being labelled a misogynist, and sent to Miss de Mina's Dungeon.
(Not that I have been there myself, I just heard about it )

Mr Pimms
(someimes it is a mistake to get involved in a conversation)

I had noticed that too Mr Pimms, but i shant take it personally, I shall rise above it and continue on with dignity and poise.

j888
(needing to practise her poise after that much publicised fall at the Keeper award ceremony)

I am sure your elegance and refinement are a byword where you live, which can not be tarnished by a single unfortunate incident, and which should probably be reported to Health and Safety officials for the awards ceremony - were those steps polished?


Mr Pimms
(what is Hammsy gonna say when he sees the implications on his masculinity?)

If you mean my assertion that he is asexual, it is not a slur on his masculinity, rather his sexuality, although I know most men think the two are inextricably linked.

Im sure dear Hamish understands that it is a joke, although he may just set his extensive legal team onto me again...................

j888
( considering offering Jeffrey money to write a tell all expose on MadHamishs' private life)

Lets not fall into a MadHamish bashing session please!

The reason I did not get upset concerning Pimms using 'the brackets'
is that Pimms hails from the Northern hemisphere and I would expect that sort of distinct lack of imagination from a northerner. I do however expect much more from my country folk. So this is the reason that my legals got all stroppy. We in the great southern land have much higher standards concerning style and originality. Nothing personal Jackie, just business and I know you can do better!

Pimms- Be aware that the horde of evil flying monkeys are still on thier way to give you a good smiting.(They are currently on their stop over in Bangkok, it's a long way!

It's getting hard to see the screen with the bevy of stunning beauties surrounding and wishing to satisfy my every whim (asexual pah! A rollocking piece of heaving 'very masculine' man meat am I!!

MadHamish
(So damn sexual, I can hardly bear it! woof!)

whats that dog doing there?? Beastiality Hamish?? I hope its at least a girl dog.

j888
(not using brackets anymore )

The woof was an example of my manliness, not indicating my 'affection' for animals.

MadHamish
(Meaow!)

You can't honestly expect to post such a succession of outrageous activities without attracting some saner, well-balanced (with chips on both shoulders) replies trying to knock you down.

Asserting your flirtation with other celebrities makes you fair game for unprovable smears - are you for instance a non-practicing cannibal? When did you stop biting the heads off babies?

Pimms
(what a tangled web...)

I would like to take this opportunity to say that I have never at any point in time been trying to "knock you down" dear Hamish, I am merely playing the game as I think it is meant to be played.

At the risk of getting 's from you both I would also like to take this opportunity to tell you both what a smashing time Ive had talking to you. People who get what Im saying are few and far between (look how disparate We three are Qld, Melb and some ridiculous island somewhere that I am meant to be finding for homework) Hamish you need to drop your threatened legal action and be funny and friendly again and Pimms you have to stop nagging me about my fat brain!!!

Now I want you two to kiss and make up .......and I want sole video rights to film and distribute it. ka-ching!!!

Come one, cant you just feeel the lurve?????????

j888
(one small transaction away from being a pimp)

sorry...miles away there, thinking of the outtakes from Bugs Life

I don't think Hammsy and I will ever be an item. I'll bet that's a relief for for him. But Jasy and Hammsy mmm... you are clearly twin souls, with similar tastes in men (Jeffrey), clothes, humour and veracity. On top of that you are practically neighbours (as far as I'm concerned)

I hope you'll be very happy together

Pimms

Mr Pimms

YOUR homework, as, although you continually espouse the obese brain theory, we only have your word that you are regularly doing anything about the flabbiness of your own (this im sure will bring howls of protest from Pimmsy with tonnes of documented "proof" ) is to research how to take a compliment without throwing it back in Ms J's face. ( and possibly deal with some jealousy issues)

Im very sad

j888
(if appearing to favour MrMad its probably cause he is mostly funny and doesnt nag about my fat brain, which quite obviously isnt.....erm fat....my brain)

Mostly Funny?