h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Nah not the meet. I was there, but I was also offline for at least a month afterwards so I forgot what happened before I got to my journal. I have vauge recollections of getting a pen and a t-shirt, having someone try to take my clothes off, meeting a someone who looked like a nice guy and turned out to be a nutter and Zagreb, who looks like a nutter but turned out to be a nice guy :P also I played more sports than I have done in years and tried to assasinate paper amy (but fortunately nobody noticed) However my memory is poor at the best of times and I think I may have repressed much of it.

The trip I'm talking about was to see Farrah & Matt for their engagement party. Things started badly as virgin cancelled my train...and the one after...and the one after that...and the one after that. Finally on the fifth train I was on my way. Fortunately I had planned to be several hours early (As I didn't trust the public transport system) so I only ended up being an hour or so late.

It was worth it though! I hadn't seen Farrah in nearly long enough and I had a great time catching up. I also got to meet their (Farrah&Matts) friends from back home, which was fun. I was in the unusual situation whereby I liked everyone I met & they seemd to tolerate me. Normally I end up fighting with at least *one* person - but all was well for once

I found people playing table tennis, but since they seemed to be having an easy time of it instigated a new game wherby people end up running round the table. From there it evolved so that the bats were thrown rather than passed between players and obstacles were positioned to make running more hazordus. I'm one of these people who should not be allowed to have a hand in organising *anything*

I like chaos > : )*

The only problem was that I kept running into people who claimed to have met me before (Some up to five times) whom I really didn't recognise - I knew who they were after talking for a bit, but I really do need to develop some facility for memorising names and/or faces. Still nobody took offence, most people who meet me notice the state of my mind quite quickly and realise it isn't personal.

I said I liked everyone and I did - but there were some people I liked a *lot* namely Mark and Chrissy and someone whos name I've forgotten and face I can just about call to mind who will hereafter be reffered to as Bob. Mark&Bob challanged my views on religion, theres nothing I like more than getting into a good theological debate at a party They had some interesting views and have given me a lot to think about. I may even be forced to admit that the mind is a seperate entity to the body, but I won't be pushed into thinking that this doesn't mean I can't manufacture one. I had what we thought was an interesting discussion on some points of psychology (concerning the theory of mind) with Chrissy. Then we looked up and realised that we had reduced a group of 6 to a group of 2 with our discussion, ah well we had fun. All this and running off along the usual tangents of temporal inaccuracies and inverting people. Followed by several games, incliding the animal game in which 'rabbit' learned my name as 'squirrel' and couldn't remeber my real name. I don't mind, I've returned the favor.

That was the first four hours or so. I was then asked to sleep with all the blokes in Matts living room+, but declined. This was because I have been told I argue with myself in my sleep. I can't ascertain whether this is true or not because I'm normally asleep at the time. I guess I will have to leave the penguin on record.

The morning after the night before I was grumpy and had a headache. I know what your thinking, but I don't drink. The problem was that as someone who is used to rising when the clock reads 'pm' I was agrovated at being woken when it reads 'am' not only that but it was SINGLE-DIGIT AM. > : ( ) I resolved to glare at everyone until it was at least 10. I told them so, as such there was a 10 second count down at 9:59:50. After which I bounded out of my chair and hastened the organisation of our trip to the natural history museum.

The NHM was all very exciting. Nice to see adults pushing kids out of the way to play with the toys Farrah also found the source of my relationship problems:
Machine "Press the button lightly, feel the vibrations and decided whether it is a fly or another spider"
Greg "Fly"
Machine "It was a mate, if you eat your mate then all of their courting was wasted"
Farrah "Thats it! You can't tell the difference between women and food"
Well then, problem solved. Content with my new knowladge of the world of food vs mates we wondered back to Farrahs house where I managed to convince someone they had the wrong number bay ansering their phone in my best office voice "hello, said residence this is gregory carslaw speaking how may I direct your call" It turned out to be Farrahs sisters boyfriend who was currently in the doghouse. Ahh well, mebbe its not such a bad thing not to be in a relationship right now. Got more of a chance to catch up and was fed (always a bonus for a student)

Finally we went out to a plub. This was a real downside, I had enjoyed myself so thourghly that I thought nothing could make me regret going. I was right of course, I always am but only just. Let me explain, that wasn't I typeover a bit back I meant plub. It is a new, high-uka`, word I have created. It describes the sort of place that has all of the drawbacks of a pub and all of the drawbacks of a club combined with the benefits of neither. There was nowhere to sit, the music (I am told) was abysmal - certainly it was lound enough people were yelling into each others ears, it was boring and as a t-totaler I couldn't even try to sedate myself. They also searched my bag for weapons - good thing I decided against the katana. As usual I was IDed as usual I had no ID as usual they let me in anyway. They made me promise I would being ID next time, this I gladly did since I would sooner shoot myself in the head with a HMG loaded with .50 DU rounds~ than go back there. The whole experinece has left me more traumatised than Rocky horror did and has done irrepairable damage to peoples attempts to make me go clubbing.

Still the evening was saved, I went back with Chrissy, Farrah and Matt all of whos company I enojoy immensly. Again discussing vaugly implausable but nonetheless interesting ideas culminating in a civilisation emerging from under a carpark with a more advanced space program than ours. Spent the evening with Farrah and came back here in the morning (Virgin redirected my train again making it take an extra hour to get back)

Still even with the trains and the plub it has been one of the most enjoyable experiences of my recent life and I fully intend to repeat it when I get the chance.

* [Since h2g2 has taken a dislike to my arachnic smilies, converting just parts of them, I am having to space the characters out]
+ [No not like that, dirty minds, I dunno]
`uka - a word me and Andrew made up to finish a game of scrabble. "The finetic pleasingness of made up words, e.g. Fantabulous can be said to have high-uka or good uka whereas gnjidnhgtrhgjnewjhgjiernmkdngji has bad uka"
~If you want some idea of how bad that is .50 is a big calibre bullet HMG stands for 'heavy machine gun' and DU stand for 'Depleated Uranium' Don't like pubs, don't like clubs HATE plubs.

Well, I've been described as looking like a "junkie" before (back in '97 when I had long hair, no beard and a predeliction for wooly hats) but never a "nutter". You live and learn.

This may be one of the longest Journal posts ever. I just need to ask, what is NHM?

Natural History Museum, I didn't want to type it twice in a row.

And yeah, you've got that particular expression that they always seem to give axe-murderers in films. Hard to put my finger on it, an intensity to your eyes perhaps. Either way I'm glad we met, 'twas a lot of fun speaking to you. Though I think Angband may be giving me a nervous condition. Character number 24 died today. Hit 3 pits in a row that drop you down to the next level then died 'cause I was way out of my depth.

Ahh well you die and learn.

Save the earth dude. Make buns not war. YEAH!

I don't know how to make buns. Oh the other hand I am an excellent strategist.

Surely I should stick to what I know

No man. Peace and Love. Ban the bomb.

Anyone who would agree to disarm their weapons should be allowed to keep them.

Wow man. Heavy.