h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Right, so I'm offline loads at the moment, not even lurking (yes, that feeling of being watched is me) .

I do still post and read and stuff but convos with me are going to be fragmented and slow. All worth it in the end, obviously, but I figured it would only be polite to warn people a little.

Currently, I'm trying to get a bit of balance going between work and school and having naps and homework and housework and sex and laundry and commuting and playing with the dog and not sleeping cause you had a nap which then makes you tired and then makes you need a nap. There is no logic in this.

On the plus side, school is fun.

Whew! That's a lot to juggle.

You're missed around here of course, but I'm glad to hear you're doing well in school, and am always glad to hear from you even if just for a sec. Fragmented is better than not at all.

Still enjoying looking through all of your photos!

thank you!

I guess I worry I'm going to disappear in the middle of a convo and piss people off and then they won't want to talk to me...

in other news, I have found a cookbook to buy, i think: thanksgiving 101 by Rick Rodgers.

How odd! Facebook has completely exploded in Iceland and I'm (re)discovering all sorts of people....

Most I'm not bothered by as they were abominable bullies and I'm not playing anymore, but some it's quite nice to catch up with.

Kind of bittersweet.

Several former co-workers have found me on Facebook, as have a number of RL friends I'm glad to hear from more often. Haven't found any old classmates or anything like that. Which is probably for the best.

I'm not adding most of the people I see. A few I've been happy about and I've added those.

However, I've also had someone try to add me when I didn't particularly want them to. Ended up allowing them, as otherwise it would be too obvious I was still pissed off about stuff these people forgot the next day.

Or maybe they didn't and they know they'll all be going to warmer places than Iceland is.

Although I've done it once, for the most part I avoid confronting people - I get too upset and I gain nothing. So I leave it.

But then again, maybe some of these people feel guilty when they see my name. I'd kind of like that, except then they're remembering me as a victim, which I don't want them to. I want them to wonder what I'm up to (at the most) and not assume that I'm the loser they always thought I was. (I don't know why they thought I was - had the highest grades in school - but that was back when good grades wasn't cool) But then again, their bullying almost turned me into what they thought I was...



Ai, caramba. Rambling and sounding way more maudlin than I actually am. Never mind.
Should see if I can download Barbiegirl by Aqua from somewhere.

I was picked on a lot in school, for having good grades and being so petite. I'd probably ignore some of those people, too, but mostly I'm over it.

Not the confrontational type myself, usually, either. But three times in the last three years I've cut toxic people out of my life. One, I was able to ignore long enough that the person took the hint. But the other two times I had to literally tell someone to leave me alone. It took me WAY too long to finally do it.

Posting this here so I don't explode from going crazy.

Life has been pretty good.
Am liking school and doing lots of studying.
Need a job but OH is very understanding and generous and doesn't mind if he has to support me completely as long as I use the time wisely at school instead.
Weather has been nice and we've done some gardening and stuff.

And then tonight I've been having palpitations, shortness of breath and dizziness, all linked to my blood pressure and the medication I've been put on. So much so that I had to phone the emergency phone help (not 911 style, more of a helpline with a nurse on the other end, out of hours kind of thing) and she had to refer me to the out of hours service in our local surgery so that they could assess whether I needed to be seen tonight or if it would wait till tomorrow.

OH is now measuring my every breath, I'm freaked out too (which doesn't help) and if I can't get an appointment tomorrow I'll have to go the emergency room instead as it's the weekend. And I can't do my usual lounge on the sofa thing as it's too recliney - I should sit up straight and do no exercise.

And I don't want to talk to anyone about this until I know what I'm talking about - otherwise it just sounds like dramarama hypochondriacism and I don't like my stuff to be bandied about with people I know (like family / friends / tutors) so I'd rather post it here and get it all out and then I can try and forget about it until I KNOW. And then I can tell people, or not, as the case may be.

So if anyone reads this (and cares), don't freak out and I'll post as soon as I know more.

ismarah

I've read (and care) but am not freaking. I hope you will get an appointment immediately and won't need to go to the ER.

Fingers crossed.

Had the appointment and result is that the palpitations and so on were just nasty side-effects. My medication has been changed and hopefully this one will work better for me and I'll be all cool and groovy, sans side-effects.

Weekend is looking good, weather is still nice (for practically the first time since April) two-three days in a row, so tomorrow we are going hiking with dogs and Sunday we plan to garden some more. Tonight I think I'll just sit on the sofa and read or watch tv and enjoy it.

Then come Monday, try and get a job. And study. And go to the library. And create create create.

I have new-found sympathy for the contestants in things like Project Runway with their silly time limits for getting stuff done - it really is not easy to pull something out of your hat every day with only a day to run around for it all.

I'm relieved that it was a side effect and not a residual one and hope that this medication change will keep it from happening again.

Hope the nice weather holds out and you can enjoy your hike and gardening! Weather's nice here, too.

And good luck with the job hunt.

Had a fabulous interview this morning for a part time evening job in admin. Not an industry that excited me, but I figured it didn't matter as the hours were such that I wouldn't have any problems with school.

Good little performing monkey that I am, I was quietly sure I'd get it. I know when I've nailed it, and that was it. And then they called and said 'great, lovely, wish we could' but ultimately it was a no as they couldn't offer me the flexibility that I'd require.

Basically, as the hours were 17.00-20.00 Mon - Thu, every now and then (like once every three months) I might need to have a Wednesday night off, but would make up the time on the Thursday.

Because I was honest and asked about this in the interview I didn't get the job. But I KNOW that whoever they hire is going to do whatever they want despite the schedule etc. and just pull a sickie or take the day off as holiday.

So it's back to the drawing board. I know I'm at art school, but I'm annoyed at that drawing board.

In other news, I'm also embarrassed at the moment being Icelandic here in the UK. Gordon Brown is being rather tw@tty and is posturing all over the place - never mind that this whole mess wasn't exactly planned by anyone.

It used to be all cool to be icelandic. Now assets of Icelandic companies in the UK are being seized under terror laws(!) because the whole world is going bye-bye financially.

Being the bleeding heart liberal that I am it feels very strange to be just waiting for the next elections to come round here in the UK when the Tories come to power.

Ideally those elections will be in November and will coincide with a huge Obama win in the US and suddenly the world will magically be all right.

Scuse me, I think I need to go take more magic pills.

Well. Other than the issues below, I'm great. Just thought I'd start off with that.

Since I posted here last, I've popped to Iceland for an emergency trip as my grandmother who practically raised me was dying. Magically she pulled through and is still with us in body albeit not in mind, which she was beforehand. I sat with her for 2 1/2 days, holding her hand and humming to her. All I saw on that visit was my mum's house and the hospital, with a quick pop out one night to see my best friend for 30 minutes.

Other Half (also known as DT, i.e. DancingTree), lovely amazing human being he is, splashed on the ticket to get me there as mum had called me on a Sunday night to tell me and I wanted to catch the 13.00 flight on the Monday, but it was sold out on the website. The only thing people suggested I could do was show up at the airport and go as a stand-by passenger if someone was a no-show, apparently quite common due to the financial stuff as Iceland's popularity plummets.

So OH drove me to the airport, sat with me for 2 hours until it became apparent that there was only 1 seat left, in business class, he splurged £550 on a one way ticket. So I kissed him lots and then legged it through security and onto the plane. I must have looked really dodgy as this was in late October, inside, and I was walking around everywhere with dark sunglasses on.

Oddly, the reality of sitting with gran was better than being in the UK. We were told 2x that she would probably not make it through the night, but she did and is still there. I flew back after those two nights (when we were told that she wouldn't be there in the morning) as it became unrealistic to stay much longer, especially as gran would not thank me for blowing my education over her. And then OH picked me up at the airport and since then we've all sort of relaxed about gran. We know she won't be here much longer, but she being very well taken care of.

While I was in Iceland I should have had a cardiologist appointment, which I cancelled, hoping to get a new appointment shortly, as there were some tests done in September that I haven't seen the results for, plus the whole thing is now getting ridiculously drawn out. I've been told that it's likely I'll get an appointment in March 2009, unless GP pushes it, which he has expressed a disinterest to do.

GP now has me on ACE inhibitors that are meant to be built up over a period of time before maximum dose is reached. I'm now on level 3 out of 4, as of this morning as BP has remained stubbornly high (higher even, if possible). Oh and I'm now unable to sleep on my left hand side (which I've always been able to do before) as I have massive palpitations if I do that and it leads out into my arm which becomes numb and then I have a panic attack. GP seems to think that this is normal and that nothing has changed in my body, it's just my posture. I have a tempur mattress and ergonomically shaped tempur pillow, so I'm not sure what he means.

This is one of my problems with my GP. I had my GP changed as the previous one was too much of a bitch to try and talk to. This one (until my last two visits to him, 2 weeks apart) stands up, shakes my hand and introduces himself, never mind that he's been my doctor for 3 years. When I made a throwaway comment about the side-effects I suffered in September, how it made sense that I'd be the one to have those, he went, 'oh, have you got allergies?' ! This is the man that prescribes my antihistamines, steroids, inhalers and adrenaline pens, all of which is in my file! When I said something about dietary restrictions due to allergies and now BP complicating things, he asked if I had actual allergies or was merely intolerant of some foods. Again, prescription person!

Anyway, this is why it makes it hard for me to take him seriously. He may be telling me the gospel truth, but he has no credibility with me. So I really want to talk to someone (like the lovely cardiologist I saw in September) about things, like this left hand side business, like dietary issues, and the fact that OH and I don't have kids and if that's even an option anymore. Instead of a friendly person who I can actually talk to, I have Dr. GetOutAsSoonAs, whose first name should be Ican'tbebotheredtoreadanynotes, Noddy for short.

I also have my first semester assessments next week and am working my little fingers to the bone writing all my papers and cutting up papers and gluing and sticking and so on. I'll post more afterwards...

Gah, almost forgot. We've also bought tickets to go on holiday next year! 3 weeks in Florida - woohoo.

Turns out h2g2 doesn't have a post size limiter. Cool!

Ooh, I've written 6 out of 10 mini-papers that are due on Wednesday and done this seriously rockin' bookcover too...

I might actually pull this off.
Which would be nice.


(incidentally, I miss the Fast Show character who did all these amazing things that got more and more elaborate as the story went on; eg 'we had dinner with tom and alice across the road and rod stewart pops in and sings us a song, but elton john didn't like it, so he did an impromptu concert in the back garden.' and then finishes with the humble phrase, 'which was nice'.)

Stayed up till 5am this morning to finish my Top 10 project and other bits - which paid off as today I went to college and handed it all in and got my assessment (on things other than Top 10 which will take a bit longer).

Suffice to say I'm now having a nap, after drinking a celebratory bacardi breezer and achieving a level 3 (highest / desired level) over all in all modules.

Tutor will have to sit me down to explain to me exactly where that comes from, next week maybe.

Of course the irony was that at 5am when I went to bed, I still couldn't sleep, tossing a turning for at least half an hour. Normally, not an issue, but when you're at less than 3 hours of available sleep it sucks.

I don't hesitate to ignore friend requests on FB... Just don't have any inclination whatsoever to let some people see what I'm up to. Especially old classmates for whom I just feel indifference (so bad that I don't even actively dislike them..).

You defied the bullying pressure, doesn't necessarily make you better or stronger, but you can find strength from all your experiences, good or bad.

I say, don't accept friend requests from people you don't want to have there. Also, you can remove people from your friend list without them being notified (which is a handy trick to know). FB and such shouæld be used for letting selected people know what you're up to. I would want to be able to categorize people and decide which category has access to what info.

If you were to remove me from your facebook I would not consider that an insult of any kind, although I do hope that I'm not one of those you accepted so as not to offend..

Never sweetie - although I will admit it took me a sec to place you!
Good to see you here too, I always look forward to catching up with your news when possible.