h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

After what seemed like an age of waiting, my friend gave birth to a healthy 7lb 15oz baby boy at 10.50pm Saturday.
I was there for most of the labour, giving her shiatsu and acupressure for pain management and emotional support.

What an experience! I'd never seen a birth in "real life" before, and it totally blew me away. The hours and hours of labour were so taxing for the mother, and it was really hard for her husband and Mum to witness her pain seeing as there was not much that they could do to help her. Birth is a one woman show.
During the labour, I was working some acupuncture points to help facilitate the downward movement of the baby and to help dilate the cervix more quickly. One point in particular seemed to be doing the trick, and my friend's mantra throughout her labour was:
"aaaahhhhh!!!......harder!!"

It was a really tiring day for me too. My friend called me at about 11pm to say that she had had a show, and she thought that she was therefore going into labour fairly soon - no sleep for me! Another call at 3am to tell me that she had begun labour, but the pains were not yet that strong and she would call me when they became harder to deal with. At that point I got up and dressed, made my sandwiches, had breakfast (!) and sat down to wait (going back to bed was just not an option - I'd started to flap about at that point, and was really nervous and excited.
Got the call at about 5.30am to go over - got there at 6am to a surreal scene of Mum-to-be wandering around the house with her trousers round her ankles, Dad-to-be making a bacon sandwich and Gran-to-be flapping around doing the cleaning and washing up.
I used some points to help relieve the mild contractions, and didn't have the heart to tell my friend otherwise when she said "oh the pains are quite strong now, like bad period pains. I don't think they're going to get much stronger than this".

When they started getting stronger and harder, we got in the car to get to hospital - my friend on all 4's on the back seat with her backside stuck high in the air, me behind her massaging her back.....we got a fair few funny looks from the neighbours.....

To cut a long labour short, my friend handled it really well, especially as her cervix was being slow to dilate. After a run-in with one of the midwives (there were 3 lots of shift changes during the course of the labour!) who seemed to want to scare my mate into giving birth "now!" or have a caesarean, and telling her that she was "disappointed in you that you haven't dilated enough" ,
2 really lovely ladies came in to deliver the baby boy at 10.50pm.

Sleep deprived and emotional, I couldn't contain myself when he was born....what an experience. I feel blessed to have been a part of the birth - not many people get to witness giving birth unless it's their own or their partner's labour. During the first part of labour, I found myself thinking "ooh not for me.....I don't want to go through this!", but as soon as the baby was born, I saw my friend glowing with such a radiant light (and endorphins and the dopamine rush!!) that she looked like a goddess....words cannot describe the rush of emotions at that moment.....relief, joy, fatigue, concern, joy, joy,joy......and I found myself thinking "I can't wait for this to be me".

Hi LSF

I really enjoyed reading about the birth of your friend's baby as it gave me a witness's perspective. Vicki, a good friend who hasn't any children of her own and who used to partner me in an Iyengar Yoga class attended the birth of my first Child, Mair in 1987 (Thankfully my ex-husband didn't bother to turn up for the event!). Vicki was the first person to see Mair (even before I did!) and I remember vividly her bursting into tears of joy and thanking me for allowing her to witness something so beautiful. (I hope that she meant Mair's birth and not how I totally savaged a beanbag in the process with my teeth! )


When is your own baby due?

Hi - welcome to my space

Birth really is an amazing thing....although I have yet to experience it from the painful side...maybe I'll change my mind if and when I acutally get to that point! You asked when my baby is due - well not any time soon, I'm not pregnant! I'd love to be, but that's another story involving heartache and lots of , so I won't go into it here.

This was the first birth I've witnessed, and I hope to centre my Shiatsu practice around pre and post natal mums, and working with labouring mothers like I have done with my friend. I wasn't too sure if that's what I wanted to do, but now I am certain. I met a lay midwife in Hawaii last year who told me of the birthing centre where she studied in Texas, and I was quite interested in going there for 6 months to become a lay midwife myself, but I'm unsure if the qualification holds any water here in the UK.

The other thing that I'm interested in is the practice of yoga for pre and post natal women. I've been practising Sivananda yoga for about 8 years, and have recently discovered the joy/pain of Ashtanga.... I did think about training to become a Sivananda yoga teacher in Kerala in India, but now I'm not so sure (a friend of mine recently trained there, and had less than good things to say about the way the ashram was run and the quality of the teaching/training).

So many things to learn, so little time!!

I'm hope that one day, when the time is right and most likely when it's the most inconvenient, you'll find yourself preggas LSF.

My daughter Mair was the biggest but the best accident I've ever had and if it hadn't been for her and my wanting the very best for her, I wouldn't have had the courage to leave my alcoholic ex-husband.

At the time I was expecting Mair, I bought a couple of wonderful books that you might find useful if you're interested in the practice of Yoga for pre and post natal women...that's if they're still available. It might be worth asking at your local library.

Exercises for Childbirth
by Barbara Dale & Johanna Roeber
ISBN 0-7126-0024-8
Century Publishing Company

Active Birth
by Janet Balaskas
ISBN 0-04-612033-5
Unwin Paperbacks

Before and during my pregnancy with Mair I was fortunate enough to have both a wonderful Iyengar Yoga teacher and class partner. Following Mair's birth I started to gently practice some seated and lying Yoga asanas on my bed whilst in the post natal ward and got some peculiar looks from fellow patients and nurses!

I'm almost certain that a work colleague and fellow student went to an ashram on a Greek Island to attend a Yoga teacher training course...However it was such a long time ago, that the name of the Island eludes me.

I bought the Sivananda Yoga Centre's 'The Book of Yoga' way back in the 1980's and it is a lovely book.

I've found that life is one long learning curve LSF. Good luck and be adventurous whilst you're young and full of energy.

Thanks Gwennie

I think sometimes as women, it takes someone else's welfare to be at stake before we can have the courage or insight to be able to leave unhealthy situations. I'm glad you had the courage to be able to leave your alcoholic ex-husband.

Thanks for the info on those books - I've heard of Janet Balaskas before (not sure where!), so I think I'll see if I can get hold of her book.

And as for being young and adventurous.....well, I intend to carry on being outrageous and adventurous well into my dotage! I'm 29 in September, but I'm feeling quite ancient at the moment due to the flare up of an old back injury - I think if I attend any more births, I'll have to find some sort of surgical corset!! Never know, if might be quite....stimulating

I enjoyed reading your account too, I had my two with epidural pain relief. As a nurse I was a firm believer in taking full advantage of modern pain control. However there wasn't much of an alternative at the time (1980 and 1983).

I would have loved to have tried being massaged all the way through, I'm sure labour would have been much more enjoyable. It was still the days of full shaves and enemas though, but for teh deliveries I had wonderful midwives.

The first was a Jamaican lady, she had also been the Night Sister on my very first set of nights as a second year student nurse, she used to call me Honeybunch. She rememberd me 6 years later and greeted me as I staggered into the labour ward with the cry 'Honeybunch'which made me burst into tears! She was lovely and reassuring, even when N01 son was born 'flat' and blue she was calm and capable, had him awake and pink in no time.

No2 son was delivered within 5 hours of the onset of labour, bright pink, wide-eyed and very much awake. But he was 10 days late and has done things in his own time ever since!

Hey LSF, what a great piece.

I never ever wanted children, petrified of childbirth. But when I had #1 (induced,but I'm convinced she had planned to turn up that day) I realised that there is nothing like it. Absolutely nothing. And there really is nothing anyone can do to help. There are peripheral things, but boy oh boy, when you get to hold your own baby for the first time it's like all the best highs you ever had rolled into one, and then some.

#2 was very different, I went from 0cm to 10cm in 90 minutes. And it hurt, but there we have it, she was born to be hectic. Well, Gwennie met them so she can vouch for it.

Good luck with being a lay midwife though, sounds like it would be a well used service.

Hi ladies

I didn't know if the shiatsu/acupressure was going to be much of a help, other than offering emotional support, but my friend had this answer on hand after the birth for all the midwives at the hospital who remarked that she was very brave (or stupid!!) to go through a long labour with no pain relief:

"the acupressure WAS my pain relief"

I guess that women are designed to give birth, and a lot of the interventions that go on in modern midwifery are unneccessary (sp??)...
I'm glad the days of shaving and enemas are gone.

Both my sproglets (Mair: 8lbs 9oz & Chris: 8lbs) took about five hours from the onset of labour. I managed without pain relief for both and with Chris even had a drop in during his break as he wanted to witness a natural birth for a change.

What's that old expression now? "No sense, no feeling!"

Mind you, John's hand still hasn't quite recovered full sensation from my crushing it!

Every time I watch the Only Fools & Horses sketch in which Dell's Mrs gives birth to Damien, I'm reminded of Chris's birth and I can't help but roll about with laughter.

Well done for giving birth naturally Gwennie!

I think that in our society people are so afraid of the idea of pain - there are so many drugs available to allieviate every ill (supposedly), and just look at the amount of people that are addicted to things from nicotine and sugar...right the way through to heroin. All of those substances serve as some sort of 'remedy' to allieviate emotional/physical stress.

*trying hard not to go into a rant*

I think that the FEAR of pain is the problem when it comes to childbirth. Obviously, as I have never given birth, I can only say this from observation and not from experience, but I know that I for one used to be absolutely terrified at the idea of giving birth - it was the IDEA of the amount of pain and how long it could go on for that used to make me go into a panic (was a bit of a problem seeing as I was pregnant at the time!).
I sometimes suffer from the most horrendous period pains, and I have found that when I am afraid of the pain that they may bring (physically manifesting in 'holding' on and not letting my cramps just flow), that's when I suffer the most. If I can just let the pains ebb and flow (I imagine much like contractions in childbirth, only milder) and take them one at a time, I can deal with them.

OK, going to stop rambling now and go and put my feet up with a nice

can I get a "well done" too? No meds for me (well there wasn't time)

I think you're right though, you have to go with the flow. And the breathing thing (I think it's the Lamaze thing,but I'm not sure) really helps, I was so busy concentrating on that that I didn't have time to notice the pain!

The worst thing? I was worried I wouldn't know when to push!!

Oh the bliss of ignorance.

Well done Sho for giving birth naturally!

Here, have lots of and (not peppermint...)



Isn't that the point with the breathing, concentrating on it so hard that you don't notice the pain?!

My Sivananda yoga teacher told a pregnant lady in the class to concentrate/meditate on her third eye area between her eyebrows whilst in labour...that's a pretty hard test of one's ability to meditate!

I tried this when I was having particuarly horrendous period pains, and I found that it helped take my focus away from the (quite considerable) pain in my belly.

As far as I can tell, every new expectant mum is worried that they won't know when to push....seems to me that you have no choice - if you gotta push, you gotta push!

It's not so much the pushing, as the remembering all the things you have to do when you push, breathe in, close eyes, chin on chest...

I did one push with #2, probably (but I can't remember) with one or more eyes open. And I couldn't see properly (had double vision) from the 31st July to mid October.

Thanks for the I really need a couple of s though... got to start making the pinata for #2s birthday party tonight (the party is next week)

sigh, that means clumps of newspaper/wallpaperpaste all over the house for a couple of months.

I think the best approach to childbirth is the ignorance is bliss one.

Having done 12 weeks obstetrics nursing, assisting at quite a few births, there was no way I was going to put up with that pain! In fact my choice would be to lay an egg that then sits in a gentle oven incubating for 9 months!

One of my tasks was to was to bag up the placentas to send to one of the large cosmetic houses .

The best advice I had in labour was from the Jamaican midwife (I wish I coud remember her name), she told me to imagine I was pushing a banana out, so that I pushed down then tried to use my muscles to push up Sounds odd I know, but it did work, specially as the epidural first time round worked only down one side!

for Sho....

Don't like the sound of the eye popping double vision thing that you had after your second birth...

OK, going to seem really dumb now, but what is pinata?? Anything like papier mache?

Caerwynn - I think you're on to something there with the laying of an egg and letting it incubate for 9 months....maybe we could have a word with God?!

I'd heard somewhere once before about placentas being used for some company or other, but thought it was an urban myth. What on earth do the cosmetic companies use them for?!?!?!

Mexican I believe (pinatas)

A huge papier maché thing, in this case a clown face, and it's filled with confetti and sweets and little things. The kids bash them to bits....

if you want to see last year's effort (for #1s birthday) you'll have to hunt round my website....

Oh right! I know what you mean now Sho - I've seen a couple of pics of those, but not on your website....what's the url so I can go and have a good nose around?

Methinks that Sho must have nodded off...

Ah poop, sorry LSF!!

ok, I updated the site, so you can see both efforts so far... one for each of the gruesome twosome.

http://www.geocities.com/majclanger/index.html

Enjoy!