h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OH MY GOD!!

One of the greatest revelations of my mature life came to me a couple of minutes ago! Listen up; Cute, sexy Malcolm McDowell from 'A clockwork orange' is the same person as that creepy, snippy Malcolm McDowell in the 'Fantasy Island' TV series.

Sweet Mercy! No!!

You might think me strange (I knew all along that the old man was named Malcolm McDowell, but I never drew that direct line until a few minutes ago), but in my little world, people I admire aren't meant to grow old, you see. Yet they all fail to please me.

McDowell - who was meant to forever be around 30 years old, with nicely chiseled features and fascinating eyes.
Kiefer Sutherland - who should always look like he did in 'Stand by me', or failing that, in 'The lost boys' minus the mullet.
And definately Paul McCartney - who should have been refused to grow beyond the age of 24! (I'm in fact going to his concert in two weeks)

The only case I know of success when good-looking guys grow old must be Al Pacino, who's actually cooler and more attractive in 'The Devil's Advocate' ('97) than in 'The Godfather' ('72). I think he might stop the ageing experiment now, though. Please.

And what a strange coincidence these revelations about age should come to me the same day I started reading 'The picture of Dorian Grey'...