h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ho hum, today was a day much like any other day. My crown was finally delivered. It is not exactly as ordered [good help in the castle is so hard to get these days] but will do for the time being. We must keep up appearances.

I am thinking that those involved in my ...ah...crowning, should be rewarded. [you know who you are]

Perhaps a Knighthood, or some such honor.

hmmmm.....

(Sings)
"God save our Dragon Queen/Long live our great blu Queen/God save our Queen!/Send her victorious/Scaly and glorious/Long to fly over us/God save the Queen!"

Oh, Ormondroyd, ACE--

What can I say. I am speechless.
[dragon eyes glisten, emotionally]

*AHEM, COFF, COFF*

[assumes regal-dragon-bearing, raises paw in dragon-queen-like way]

We are honored, Lord Ormondroyd,ACE, by your patriotic singing. We would like to offer you a small token, in appreciation for this noble act...

[offers plate of double-fudge, chocolate-frosted, pecan brownies]

Possibly there will be a festivity at a later date, where we will be able to offer you ...er...'adult' beverages. Meanwhile, enjoy the brownies.

And here are some fish, in the true spirit of H2G2, on which our little kingdom [queendom?] is firmly founded.



The Queen does not forget a kindness.

}:=8
Her Royal Majesty,
The bluDragon,
Dragon Queen of Damogren

Oh, the crown is a GLORIous thing!! What beauty! What splendor! Perfectly befitting a kind and gracious queen such as yourself, my good bluDragon.

I brought Alice [the Cat] in to take a look. She was, unfortunately, not impressed....

Which is typical of cats.

Now is it that a cat may look at a queen, but a queen may not look at a cat? or is it the other way around? or both?

And what about if the queen is a dragon queen???

So many questions...

I may need a Protocol Officer/Controller of the Cats

Heavy is the head that wears the crown...

E|}:=8

the queen herself

Well, I've spoken with the protocol officer, and....

It seems that a cat may look at a queen, and a dragon queen may, indeed look at a cat.

In addition, a cat may 1) sit on a queens lap. 2) Walk across a queen whilst the queen is trying to sleep. 3) Demand that a queen fill her food and/or water dish. 4) Request that a queen open a closed door at four in the morning, solely so the cat may walk in a room, decide there is not much to see there, after all, and walk out again. 5) Slam herself forcefull against a queen's legs in a request to be scratched.

As it turns out, a queen may request none of these things of a cat. And the cats, as a whole, request specifically that the queen avoid numbers one and two, as either or both would likely do severe bodily harm to the cat.

May I suggest that the queen hold her crowned head high, for if the cats see her as fit company (moreover, as company befitting a visit from the Protocol Officer), than the queen is, indeed, of regal nature.

Respectfully,
The Spokesman For The Cat

Hello again, your scaly majesty.
Isn't it nice that the background on h2g2 pages is royal blue? Almost as if they knew you'd soon become royal, blu...
Anyway, I just wondered whether, now that you are a Queen, you planned to fly to Britain and visit the one over here - you know, Lizzie Windsor or whatever her name is - and have a state visit and compare crowns and so on?
I think she's probably fairly dragon-friendly. After all, her eldest is the Prince of Wales, and the Welsh flag has a red dragon on it.