h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That's about as useful as I feel at the moment. First, a little background.

A good friend of mine meets this woman. He is immediately taken with her. He finds himself calm and at peace when being around her. But due to some rather trying forays into love in his past, he is afraid to act on his feelings. So he continues to keep his feelings hidden, hoping that one day she will make the first move.

Unfortuantly, that day never came. As of yesterday, she is apparently involved with someone else. What's the problem you ask? Well, the man she is seeing now happens to be a good friend of his. He won't begrudge another man of his happiness so, as far as I can tell, he has decided to let go for the moment.

This whole situation is tearing him up inside. He may not show it, but I know the pain is there. What can I do? He's been one of my best friends for almost ten years, and I can't just let him suffer with no end in sight. A few of us (other friends) tried to give him advice as to how to approach her and begin the relationship. Well, obviously, that fell flat. I'm not Dr. Love, and I make to pretense to say that I am. But I've given him the best answers that I can; we all have.

So what do I tell him? What the hell can I do or say that will help him out?

You could always hire a hit out

Hmmm... I'd stay out of it, but offer him any support he needs. It sucks when things don't turn out the way one wants, but really, if you provide support for him he should be able to move on and find another hoopy frood

Hmm, I see your point. We have all tried to lend moral support throughout this entire ordeal... but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know how to help someone who is convinced they are worthless.

Hmmm... try convincing him to see someone about that

Ehh, I'm afraid that might stoke the fire. I don't know, I guess I'll just stay in the background and see if I can't help him out without seeming to be too pushy about it.

I went through the same thing, but after about 5 years I ended up getting the girl. It was the best three weeks of my life. The problem is I went out with her for a year.
So the only advise I have to give to your friend (not that you asked) is the old cleche "Be careful what you wish for, It might come true."

I see your point. The grass is always greener, eh? I've told him that the entire situation isn't what he needs right now anyway. For you see, the woman in question has a kid. Now I know that doesn't necessarily make her suddenly undesireable; but when you're twenty and trying to find your niche in the world... well, I don't think that's the way to go. Whether he agrees or not, I don't know.