h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Today has been the most insanely bipolar day of my life.

First, I met KIEFER SUTHERLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the incredible TV series 24 and got his autograph.

Then, 100,000 people tried to come to the beach while I was working parking control. I got called a retard, among other things, and probably have about five complaints pending against me.

Then, I almost had three 415's on my hands. That's code for a citizen attacking a police officer (among other things).

Then, I got home to find out that my sister moved out of my parents house.

Then, she moved back in.

Then, I found out that her little boyfriend tried to break down my parents' door and bashed their fence in.

Then, I found out that she told my mother that she had an abortion a couple weeks ago.

Then, I got A GMAIL ACCOUNT!!!!!!!!!!

This has been the best and worst day of my life, all in the last 11 hours.

At least it wasn't boring.

Buy a lottery ticket! Buy extensive insurance! Go to bed and pull the covers over your head! Take up unicycling on high wires!

Your day reminds me of the supposed ancient Chinese curse- *May you live in interesting times!*



At least you came out the other end safe and sound.

Times do seem to be very interesting for you indeed, soeasilyamused.

Tell me....anyone in the Real World know that you're a supervillain?

Seriously, though, I'm glad those 415's were only "almosts," and that all the negative aspects of the day seemed to have some positive aspects to balance them out. Here's hoping that tomorrow's better.

Tomorrow (today) was better. I brought a puppy home from the police station for my sister. Here's hoping he keeps her out of any more trouble.

"May you live in interesting times"... I think I need to get that tattooed on me. Wonder if I know anyone fluent in Chinese???

And that's a negative, Affy. The fiance knows, but he doesn't really count. And I do occasionally make statements like, "When I'm global dictator...." So they might have suspicions.

I just blatantly say that I'm a supervillain. No one believes me.

Glad to hear that "Interesting Times: The Sequel" wasn't quite as bad as the original.

If only they knew the truth... Ah, well. Someday they'll know, and they'll regret doubting you.

Maybe they'll like my rule, and be glad that they did nothing to stop me.

A benevolent dictator? And here I thought only *I* would be one of those....

Not benevolent. "Whimsical."

"From this day forth, people may have a month removed from long prison sentences by agreeing to be a guest on an episode of my game show."

Ahem, I've got a couple ideas for that boyfriend problem. Now I don't know if you were wanting short range or long range supression so I brought both

*Yo opens the case to reveil the 1R-24 Varmint Special*
http://www.bushmaster.com/shopping/weapons/lr-24v.asp (my new 2nd favorite gun by the way, the tango 51 is still numbero uno!)
Yeah, you're good up to ohhh about 500 yard for this one I think, now if you were looking for up close and personal you really have to go with the good old Benelli M4 Super 90. But seriously, if you really want to get rid of him you have to go with this : http://www.neweyestudio.com/ebayD/ebd519.jpg

Its an oldie but a goodie! Of all of them I'd invest in the last one



I hope things are looking up for you my friend.

If you'd rather not get toooooo close-

http://www.tnarmyguard.com/9_images/6-GuardPic/howitzer/Howitzer.GIF

I'm sorry, but I think we all know what the all around coolest piece of tech on hootoo is.

A270677

Satisfaction guaranteed....and our hot Summer prices have just entered a downward Fall....

What I wouldn't give for a smiley....I'd use it so frequently!

Ooooooooh... howitzer.....

I could just set it up in my backyard and shell his house. I wouldn't even have to get off the couch!

Things are a bit better now.... though the stress still remains. Now I am worried about my mom losing her job, as she's taken a lot of time off to babysit the brat 24-7. That child hasn't had a minute alone in almost three weeks.