h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Today I cooked dinner for my mother. This is something I do every Sunday but only rarely on Saterday's. She is no longer vable to cook nutritouse food for herself. I speak to her each day. She nearly went over this past Winter. It was just the flu but it was nearly fatal to her. It reminded me of when I explained to my small children that the reason so many markers in the cemetary were of toddlers and infants was due to a lack of medicine. My mother is almost at a point where she is unable to care for herself and already I find that I do more and more in seeing to her affairs. I find joy in this but sadness too. I speak to my daughter every night. She lives almost two thousand miles away and I worry about her always. Though she is a grown woman stil she is my child and the youngest of eight that I have raised. She sometimes complains that I want her to call every night but she secretley likes knowing how much I care. Her freinds think it is sweet. I try not t nag any of my children. I have a sliding scale of interference that works with their age and ability to be independent. They are all independent but are twenty two to thirty four in age. By thirty I make a policy of not offering my opinions on their actions or plans unless asked. I am asked frequently and think this is a blessing. I think tht they will raise their children the same. One day they will take care of my wife and myself, but only when we need to. It is I told them natures way of calling one home when we no longer are aware of our surroundings and lose control of our bodies. They understand. When the time comes I hope that I am able to recognize it. I will walk to the woods where I have always loved to hunt and fish and camp with my dogs. Then I will watch the animals and listen to the forest sounds and wait to be called. I think this is right for me. I think it honors those who have gone before me and it takes away the burden frm my kin. I am not sad to think of the wheel except that I think how long it will be until the ones I love join me. I hope my wife passes first because to think of her greif and pain if I go first saddens me very much. I will have much company of freinds that have already gone and my kin from the long past so these are not morbid thoughts to me, only thoughts.