h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The day from HADES,

We're out of coffee at work,
our London office have decided to forget to order in the equipment they need so we have to bail them out,
my ccomputer has aquired a trojan horse thanks to some bright spark form the IT support company having turned off my Norton antivirus to try and VNC my machine - which has caused half of Microsoft office to uninstall itself and prevent me from sending an email all afternoon (although on the plus side, I also couldn't recieve one, so every cloud/silver lining and all that)
then I get home and ruin most of dinner by making mashed yams that have the texture of cement and corn on the cob that could pierce sheets of steel.
Finally I've just spent 10 minutes on the phone to the NHS 24 hotline because my son has eaten and swallowed an entire packet of wrigley's spearmint that he'd managed to nick from my cupboard.
Turns out that it's a myth that it blocks your intestines - apparently it's digestible - although my son doesn't know that yet.
My son was somewhat taken aback to hear me asking whether he would need an ambulance - so should think twice before pulling that one again.
Yeah I know I'm evil - but the look on his face was priceless - little sod.

I hope you are having a better day today.

I don't think it hurts kids to be scared ocassionally. We moved to a house next to a busy road when my youngest brother was only two and my mother gave him a very graphic description of what would happen to him if he ran into the road. He cried, but he never went near the traffic!

I too hope that today has been a bit calmer.

So what's SMITE? A deliberate typo to avoid being moderated?

got it in one. All the more appropriate terms would have had me ousted from H2G2 in next to no time.
today has been calmer - virus still there but under control - although no thanks to the IT company. I left norton doing a full on scan while I left. Boss on holiday so didn't get pestered - tra la la - and managed to get loads of work done. Funny that. Children better behaved due to implementation of martial law and purchased a bottle of vodka on the way home.
TFI Friday and all that.
I saw your piece on `dr who - I also really enjoyed the new series. Particularly sweet was when my daughter ran and hid behind the door then relocated to ......BEHIND THE SOFA.
I nearly dies laughing. The kids are both very excited about it being on tomorrow - which is sweet. They're totally spoilt with Sky TV - everything is on everyday. (we limit how long they watch but it's still more than I would ideally like). It makes a change for them to have to wait for something and it's nice to see them excited. I had wondered about Eccleston as the dr - but I stand corrected - he's playing it with great wit.
How's the film career going? Have the Coen's called yet?
KD

You know, kim, when I first read your posting I thought you meant the kids had bought a bottle of vodka on the way home. Chips off the old block, eh? But I'm glad things are a bit calmer.

I've just set the video to tape Episode Two of 'Doctor Who', as I'm going on a trip to Chesterfield tomorrow and may not make it back in time. I'm really looking forward to this episode, especially as it's the one with the very 'Hitch-Hiker'-ish plot. A shame that Mr Eccleston has decided against doing another series, but as long as the scripts keep up the standard of last week's show, I'm sure the Doctor will keep going strong.

I'm glad you reminded me about the film career, since not only have the Coens inexplicably failed to call me but I really should have got the script for the latest short film I'm in by now. Must chase it up. Actually, I've played two doctors recently - wonder if there's still time for me to ask the Beeb for an audition?

Maybe you could get a part on 'No Angels'. You might get to shag Angie!
My fave bit of daft telly at the moment.
Pity about Eccleston - he maybe doesn't want to be typecast - I always thought he was a strange choice and that it was a strange choice for him. I'd love to see Eddie Izzerd get a go. I thought before they would offer it to him and I heard him tonight on J Ross show denying it again. I think he could do a good job though.
I know the thursday horror thing has finally settled because I'm sat here, half cut, eating jelly tots that I've nicked from my daughter's Spongebob Egg, watching River Cottage on cable.
When you're watching tv about vegetable competitions at 2am, you need to have a word with yourself.
Does anyone want to adopt my kids?
KD

Think I'll pass on that, kim.

Haven't seen 'No Angels', but I enjoyed another first episode from BBC Drama last weekend: 'Fingersmith'. I didn't like it *just* for the bits with two cute young women snogging, honest. It also has an exciting, intriguing story, a good script, baddies you can really hate, and great costumes and locations.

It's a good night for sci-fi fans on the Beeb tonight, because soon after 'Dr. Who' there's the remake of 'The Quatermass Experiment' on BBC4. I've never seen the original version, so I think I'll go for that. (See http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcfour/cinema/features/quatermass.shtml for details)

I didn't see it, so I can't be judgemental, but I will look out for it.
I thought tonight's Dr Who was stunning - although, as well as HHGG there was a definite bit of theft from one of my fave films - Galaxy Quest. Nonetheless it was a bit of quality nonsense. My daughter was once again entranced and a bit scared. No hiding behind the sofa this week but whispering loudly about the spiders. i also thought Zoe W was fab as the ultimate in fashion victims. Remind me to eat more pies. He he he.

Yes, you wouldn't want to end up as 'a bitchy trampoline', would you?

Did you see 'Quatermass'? Very good indeed, I thought. It's repeated on Wednesday if you missed it. But something must have gone a bit awry with the live drama - it finished about 20 minutes early, and BBC4 had to fill in with short films! I'd love to know how that happened. There weren't any obvious gaps in the story!

that'll be all those staff cuts at the beeb.... he he he.
I'm warming to Billie in the role of Rose. That trampolene line was very well delivered.
I didn't see Quatermass but will look our for it on wednesday.
I've been enjoying the fine array of rent-a-hypocrite quotes on the news this morning, what with the Pope being dead. (hope I don't offend but I'm no great fan of Catholicism, what with large chunks of my family being very into it)
War-crims Bush and Blair are out in force to proclaim him to be their bestest mate when I'm relatively sure he wouldn't have been keen on either of them. Bush described him as 'a great champion of personal freedom' - so maybe that was actually intended as an insult. After all, what the would Captain Guantanamo know about 'freedom'.
I saw a great bit of telly the other night while the BBC had just started the Pope Vigil. Some British Bishop was being quizzed on the Pope's anti-contraception stance having led to many deaths from Aids etc. This Bloke came out with some corkers. Firstly, he reckoned that this was rubbish because the Catholic church was doing a lot of good work 'in those countries that have aids' (What countries would that be then mr Bish?) Then he said, the plain truth was that condoms weren't working. That's a bit like me saying my car isn't working when I haven't turned the key or put petrol in it. I mean, if they remain wrapped in the packet, they won't work too well will they? I'm sure it will be a great comfort to those people who die of aids to know that they did what the Pope wanted. Load of arse.
The interviewer stopped the dialogue dead and moved on to something else but he looked visably shocked that this idiot had just said this on live TV. Honestly, it's appauling to see that these dinosaurs still exist. The fact that you can be that high up and yet that ignorant is frankly, an outrage.
sorry, ranting again.....