h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Throughout the guide, I have seen quite a few entries titles "Uses for a towel" or similar. These have been very informative, as I am currently compiling a list of towel uses for my high school's Dead Poet's Society. What follows is the list I will present. Included are a few suggestions that have already been made, but a sizable chunk i have come up with on my own:

· You can wrap it around you for warmth
· You can sail a small raft with it
· You can lie on one on a beach
· You can fold it for a small pillow. (This is especially popular among high school students.)
· You can use one or several as blankets on cold nights (or boring classes)
· You can wrap it around your head to avoid noxious fumes
· You can wear any number of ways including: scarf, sash, cummerbund, headband, turban, sarong, and Super Hero cape
· You can wave it in emergencies as a distress signal
· You can tie multiple towels end to end to form a rope
· You can put designs on it to form a flag
· You can, with a few knots, turn it into a bag
· You can use it to trap small animals net-style
· You can beat out small fires with it
· You can tuck it into your clothing to insulate in cold weather
· You can spread it out to form a tablecloth
· You can use it as a cushion when sitting on hard surfaces
· You can wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat
· You can wrap it about your eyes for a blindfold
· You can use red ones for matador impersonations
· You can throw it at people to distract them
· You can hold it up so you don’t have to look at certain people or things
· You can wrap your hand in it to allow you to grasp hot objects
· You can rip one up to make bandages
· You can roll it up and place it in front of a door to make it difficult to force an entry
· You can tie a weight to one end and use it to smash things
· You can wrap it around your arm to break a glass window in safety
· You can soak it in vitamin-rich liquids for an source of nutrients in an emergency
· You can lay down red ones to welcome important people
· You can fold one upon your arm to give yourself that “Obnoxious Waiter” look
· You can tie it to a ledge that you want to ease yourself down from
· You can roll it up to “enhance” certain parts of the anatomy
· You can use it to polish things that need polishing
· You can cover up a hole in the ground with it, cover it with leaves, and use it for a trap
· You can use it for kindling (WARNING: This will most likely ruin your towel!)
· You can talk to it when you need a friend
· You can hang them to use as curtains
· You can use it as a gag for quieting people
· You can hang it on your wall and use it as a conversation topic
· You can wipe off any number of surfaces with it
· You can write messages such as “Don’t Panic!” on it for reassurance
· You can wrap it around the muzzle of a firearm for use as a silencer
· You can use it to launch things, sling-shot style
· You can use multiple, colored towels to signal over a long distance
· You can wrap it around a stick for use as a torch
· You can lay it down to wipe your feet with
· You can wave white ones as a sign of surrender
· You can put sticks under it and use it for a tent
· You can lay down some of the fluffier green ones to simulate a well-trimmed lawn
· And finally, if it’s still clean enough after all this, you can dry yourself off with it.