h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yesterday (or, more precisely, the day *before* yesterday ), I came home after going home for the long weekend [yes, I have 2 homes student life's weird like that...]

Normally, this is a 2-and-a-half hour train journey - or half an hour extra if you take the connections they suggest rather than ing for the ones before. But this time was different...

Firstly, I decided to see Lifson one last time (and her new laptop! ) before I went, and get the train from there. This meant stretching the definition of my ticket by one stop, cos they were going through Hampden Park on the way *in*, not the way out, but who's gonna notice? So I packed my stuff up, and headed for the stop. Inevitably, I saw the bus I wanted passing half a street away. Thus, I ended up on the wrong bus, and after chatting to old dears while it detoured round Old Town, I got off at [in retrospect] the wrong stop.

I spent the next half hour or so working out where I was, and which roads would lead anywhere other than back on themselves. I arrived, hot, at Lifon's house - remember, I had a weekend's worth of stuff with me, made all the heavier 'cos I was wearing less of it. But still, I had some , said hello to her laptop, and goodbye to her, and, eventually set off for the station.

Now, I arrived at Hampden Park station at about the time there was *supposed* to be a train to Eastbourne. Whether it had just left, or whether it didn't exist, I never figured out, but it wasn't there. One turned up within a few minutes, but that was something of a mixed blessing...

You see, this meant I'd missed the 15:30 Eastbourne to London train I'd been intending to catch, and had to sit (on the 'wrong' side of the ticket barriers) for 20 minutes for the next one. Somewhere along the line, while I was reading my book in the ancient British Rail rolling stock they use round there, we ended up being delayed. Oh, good.

I got off at Clapham Junction, found my way to the right platform, only to find that platform 6 was closed, giving twice as many trains to use platform 5. Hmm... By this time, although I'd *aimed* to be travelling just after lunch time, I'd somehow managed to hit rush hour.

Incredibly hot, and feeling rather out of it, I staggered around the crowded underpass of the station, bought some overpriced snacks, and managed to happen upon the next train to Reading. Laden as I was, and hot and tired, I had to stand for the first couple of stops, while the stream of businesspeople thinned out.

I never did work out whether the people sitting near me had known each other before being on that train, texting their partners as they went, but they got off at the wonderfully named 'Martins Heron'. At which point I realised the train was running late!

So by the time I arrived at the station with perhaps the least appropriate name of any in Britain - Earley - it was about 19:15. Which means that from Hampden Park to Earley took me very nearly 4 hours, of hot, crowded, outdated (and condemned as unsafe, if IIRC) British, privatised trains.

Well, I just had time to say hello to my housemates before disappearing off again to the 'Reading Film Theatre' to see a reasonably clever but nothing special French film called 'He Loves Me... He Loves Me Not' (or something; in no way related to its French title, anyway, which was '[something] La Folie... Pas du Tout' I think).

Well, anyway, that's quite enough of my ramblings - I hope I haven't caused any serious timewastage because somebody actually read through all that. It just seemed like something worth recording somewher, you know? Or maybe you don't...