h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This is bloody ridiculous.

Elaine has gone away on a hen do in Spain for a few days. She went yesterday, and won't be back until Wednesday evening. I have to confess, I like having the place to myself; obviously I miss her when she's not here, which isn't very often, but it's nice to be able to do whatever I want, whenever I want.

I didn't have any major plans; a few beers in front of the TV, catching up on entering those surveys onto Birdtrack, planting the bulbs in the garden, listening to my music just a bit louder, maybe even pop out for a game of midnight snooker with our barman. Cheerful, simple pleasures to pass the time in a vaguely manly sort of way.

It started off ok, but it's horrible now. It's 41 hours since she left, and I've done nothing. The TV was boring (nothing to watch on the 200,000 crap channels I get through S*y), and I feel so lethargic and bored that I can't even get drunk, which is why I'm still here typing away after 1 1/2 ciders. All I'm doing is practising smoking, and I was quite good at that already.

I never thought I'd say it, but thank Bob for women. You're a pain in the bum at times, but if this is life without you, you can nag me as much as you like about the hoovering and my sock pile.

Just don't tell Elaine about that last line, eh?

Awww. Poor you.

We have our uses dear.

zdt

...Even when we have no credit left on our mobile phone!

Yup, getting & maybe MSN is the only answer.

zdt

Aawwww.... how sweet

Well done! Perhaps it's Elaine, rather than us girlies in general?

>>I didn't have any major plans

The solution, Rich, is always to have major plans.

You're right, G: always have plans You'll know next time Skanks.

Shut up you guys. He was almost endearing for a post.

aw,
cute!

The first thing I thought when I read Skanky's post was that I feel homesick, even though I am at home.

Even if they drive you round the bend sometimes, you eventually realise that you just can't live without them.

That sums it up quite well, Alex. And then, after three days of uselessness, within an hour of them getting home you're in trouble for some heinous crime against humanity, such as leaving the lid off the mayonnaise. When you haven't even *had* any mayonnaise.

Gnomon is right, major plans are the way to go. So I formed a cricket club

Hmm.

Well if *you* haven't had any mayonnaise.....Who Has????

Call the Heinous Crime Squad

zdt

I hope the mayonnaise is still in the fridge though.

Along with the tomato sauce, but not the HP.

Well, if it's already learned how to remove the lid, I wouldn't imagine it'll be there much longer.

Jeez Rich sounds like a marriage already!

*sticking to singledom* (*by that I mean keeping homes separate, I don't wanna be partner-less)

No, it's nothing like a marriage. We still smile at each other once in a while

Don't be a cynic Rich

Don't a Scorpio, Scorpio.