h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Librarian,

We seem to be amassing a large amount of material about bananas already. Do you think we should start compiling the data in some format? What do you think would be most useful to the Guide?

1) A travelogue of our adventures, basically a compilation of our current banana thread, to be submitted to the underguide.

2) An exhaustive listing of current banana cultivars of Earth, how they taste, the regions in which they are grown, whether they are exported, etc., to be submitted to the Guide and complement the current Banana Edited Guide Entry. If we are doing this, do you want us to translate your notes currently written in the Ook Language to English? I think that would be easiest, because then we could just use the Librarian logon to compile notes.

3) A shocking expose of Aximili's adventures in Hawaii. (I'm just checking to see if you are reading these, Axi.)

Happy

You mean I've been having adventures in Hawaii? I didn't know! Why didn't I tell me!

Shoot, Axi. You narrowly missed getting popped for underage drinking in a brewpub!


And let me tell you I was shocked, shocked!

Oh I was, was I? I shall have to have words with myself about that

Sometimes I have all the fun

Well, as long as you post regularly, you won't get into too much trouble. But if I'm left alone with my imagination for too long, there's no telling what may happen to you.

See you later.

Don't tempt me. I'm halfway curious now...


Bye

As you wish.

You are evil

I'm going to have to think about how to get out of this...

Very well done.

And who knew there was a wet bar at a National Park?
Or was it a lucky guess?

FYI, my fellow assistant librarian, the Librarian has a new entry for us to stash our banana-related notes, and maybe organize them a bit. Feel free to work on any part if you wish.

Happy

A VERY lucky guess

I'll certainly take a look at that entry.

Axi,

Er, do you still want to play?

I'm game if you are.

HN

Of course I still want to play, Happy

fluffy's sudden departure yesterday just shook me, that's all...


Besides which, how do we get the Librarian out of this situation?

>>>> fluffy's sudden departure yesterday just shook me, that's all...

Yeah, I didn't see it coming either.

>>>> Besides which, how do we get the Librarian out of this situation?

Shoot, I got him into it, I might as well get him out.

Okay, try that.

Do you still want to go to Maui?

Advantages: I actually was there for a week once. The bananas, and basically all the food, is amazing. That's where I first learned there were other bananas than the few varieties we get here. Not to mention varieties of papayas, mangos, pineapples. Have you guessed I'm a foodie?


Disadvantages: I don't think anyone will be waiting for us at the airport.

I kind of guessed that you like food and chocolate yeah

*Sighs* I know. And you know the worst thing? For some reason, I feel responsible. I know it's not true, but I can't convince myself otherwise. It's sort of guilt by association, if you follow me.

>>>> And you know the worst thing? For some reason, I feel responsible. I know it's not true, but I can't convince myself otherwise. It's sort of guilt by association, if you follow me.

Don't feel guilty. There was nothing you could have done, and precious little I could have done. Certainly nothing I would have recognized as needing to be done. I've been a bona fide nerd for a long, long time now. Sometimes I am completely oblivious. Okay, lots of times.

I've been playing adventure games off and on since I was a teenager. Some of them were structured like Dungeons & Dragons, others were loose storyline games not unlike this banana-tasting tour. I can't say no one has ever gotten upset before, because one guy who took part in a game I played many years back found out he had terminal cancer. We were all in our 20s, games in those days were played on kitchen tables, and he realized he wasn't going to live another year. He got very upset, but wanted to keep playing the game. He was so disruptive (like throwing furniture around and screaming in players' faces) that pretty soon everyone stopped coming. But we were not the cause of his anger-- he was mad at everyone who was going to live, because he wasn't. What was my point? Oh yeah, sometimes people have other, more serious stuff going on in other parts of their lives.

Aximili, the first time she withdrew from the site, we extended the cyber hand of friendship, and made sure she knew we valued her presence and her contributions here. The second time she was upset and considered withdrawing from the site, I did the same, and I'm sure you did too. I thought everything was going well, but then I disappointed her expectations of me, as you saw in the email she sent us, and she has withdrawn from the site.

Perhaps she'll be back, but this is something she'll have to work out for herself. Can she have online friends who behave in unexpected ways without responding by upset, deleting material, and withdrawing? I hope eventually she can.

We cannot control what other people do, we can only control how we respond to what other people do. For example, if someone fails to answer my posts, I wouldn't even think to take it personally. I'd think they were busy in RL, or didn't read my post, or didn't think I needed an answer. If I need or want an answer, I do not conclude they are purposefully neglecting me, I just prod them for an answer. I try never to be judgemental or ascribe ulterior motives to unexpected behavior. She may have had bad news or terrible troubles. We cannot know what is happening in her world. We can only wish her well.

Of course you're right, Happy. Besides I'm exactly the same, but obviously you've been doing it longer

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. But of course, you're right again. I'm sure if she decides to return, she will do it in her own good time.

Until then, we carry on.

And try and keep the Librarian out of trouble

NARRATOR: The Librarian ambles in, overhears what is being said and scratches his head in consternation... pulls out a crumpled copy of the emails in question, smooths them out on the table so all can see and says:

ook!

TRANSLATION: i am showing you this since you decided, happynerd, to bring offsite communications into this conversation and since you are not representing them correctly. i think, happynerd, that you have misunderstood what fluffykerfuffle said here? Also, i looked at the conversations she talked about and it appears you did have time to address her offerings and you can be very loquacious when you are interested in a person or idea. i myself would like to say that if you had communicated with fluffykerfuffle, who actually lives in the Hawaiian Islands, you may not have made the gaffs you have made in your talk story Bananas. The locals are very loving and friendly, personifying the spirit of Aloha, and would never be as uptight or rude as you portrayed them at the preserve or Uncle George's Lounge. Fluffykerfuffle tried to help you see this with the stuff she offered in your talk story but, since she got no dialogue back, was not able to clarify it for you.

From Happynerd:
Fluffy,
If you get this, please know that last weekend I had to go into town
and sponge off of some business's high speed connection, but I watched
every youtube, and I loved them. And I have been faithfully
incorporating your contribution into our banana-tasting adventure. It
was those dancers from your youtubes I was describing. And we were
coming over to your island in the virtual morning, but as far as the
adventure is going, it is still the first evening, and someone had the
audacity to call the Librarian a monkey, so there's likely going to be
trouble.

Ah but now there is trouble in RL, trouble I did not mean to cause.

I see I made a mistake. I thought the email conversation was over,
didn't you say you would see me back on hootoo? Obviously I
misunderstood, I blew it, and because I blew it, you felt lousy, and
I'm sorry that what I failed to do made you feel lousy.

I do not check this email account regularly, I have work emails that
get more attention. What inspired me to check it was the fact that
your name changed on my page. First however I checked your page, and
noticed it was rather stark. Then I realized something was wrong.

You expected me to write you. Instead of writing you, I was
researching the banana cultivars, banana cultivation both organic and
conventional, labor issues, even banana diseases, and sites we were
traveling to, what the place looked like that I was describing,
following up on hula. Not a good excuse, perhaps, but a factual one.

As to how come I'm good at GuideML, I am a complete nerd. The way some
people absorb foreign languages, I absorb tech. I majored in math in
college, I'm a self-taught programmer. I can read the manuals on all
sorts of electronic gizmos. Trust me, this is not a way to get invited
to parties. But that's okay, because I'm as socially inept as many
other nerds. BTW, GuideML looks almost exactly like HTML.

I am new to h2g2, the date on my page is the real date. And I am an
American. I don't know Aximili outside of h2g2 or before a few months
ago. It doesn't bother me if you don't believe me.

As to your attempts at deleting your writings, as far as I know, if
you unsubscribe to all your journal-related messages and
conversations, the journal entries will fall away. You could ask your
ACE though. But you may wish in the future that you hadn't been that
thorough.

I wish you well Fluffy, in all of your life adventures, in your hula
dancing, and creative pursuits. Goodbye, and good luck always.


On 8/30/07, Fluffykerfuffle wrote:
> to make sure you both understand that this is what i am saying to both of
> you, no more and no less.... i will not be sending anymore emails.
>
> for the last cupla weeks i have noticed, tho it did take me awhile, and i
> didn't want to believe it, that you guys have not really been responding to
> me in the library threads. When i was internetless, i read alot and when i
> came back i shared what i read with you and the movies i saw too. Then,
> thinking it was disturbing you that i was not participating, i decided to
> come back into the library threads... no remark from either of you despite
> that you both told me in emails that you disagreed with me staying out of
> the library. Then i worked hard to make up for my nonparticipation by trying
> to find neat things for you about bananas and to share my island with you...
> i even made a show that i worked kinda hard on to find athentic stuff that
> you guys would enjoy. i even sifted thru alot of IZ stuff for you happy cuz
> you told me his death brought tears to you. i was trying to be a team
> player. but neither of you responded to me. you didnt talk about my books my
> movies or the show i put together you didnt mention the poster that i thot
> was quite a find!! no feedback. no thank yous. no nuthin.
>
> happy you didnt answer my last email that i sent on the 21st (axi it was at
> the same time i sent you a reply to your reply to the copy of a note to
> happynerd) i figured Happy that it made you uncomfortable because i shared
> some serious stuff about me to you.
>
> i dont understand what is going on but it is the main reason i have left
> h2g2... well, actually, its the final reason. axi you have been a great
> support and alot of fun to goof off with. and i thank you.
>
> since this IS goodbye... i might as well tell you what my intuition is. My
> intuition is that you two are long-standing members who are in new names.
> (happy you know guildeml too well) ...that you have known each other for
> awhile. That you, axi, felt sorry for me wandering around there in the lost
> and found and stepped in to help... that perhaps happy was in cahoots with
> you on that. that you guys were just trying to help me... but because you
> really didnt understand what it was like for me... you guys grew weary of
> my problem. and i dont blame you. Its not your fault that you dont
> understand. i think you're both english too... or, if not, that the
> non-english person has been received so well on h2g2 that you have no idea
> what the tiny but persistent snubs and barbs are like.
>
> and i am tired of this too. And it took being sick as a dog for almost a
> week to realise some stuff... this stuff... because i was just sleeping and
> coughing and thinking... very little reading.. i couldnt read. i realized i
> was doing fine without h2g2... that it had become a relentless habit i
> couldnt seem to get out of even tho it was not paying off in friendships.
> And i was happy even tho i was sick.. that's what decided me. That the h2g2
> experience was just bad for me. My ace explained to me, early on, that h2g2
> is like walking into a party.... and he is right.. and whether it was my
> inexperience, my grief over DNAs death and subsequent fear for his creation,
> or just my americanisms that turned people off... i was not given a chance.
> And it never got better. But i tried to believe it would. But it didnt.
>
> when i deleted my stuff i decided to leave the library alone... much as i
> wanted to delete it too.. i deleted my stuff to take away me because i was
> so unwelcome there... i left the library because it IS a neat little thing
> and i believe you guys had stepped in to help me get something going to
> prove to h2g2 that i was really an okay person. And i thank you for that
> i really would like to erase my journal and messages too but i cannot figure
> out how to do that. Maybe one of you could email me with directions? maybe
> thats not a good idea, one of you emailing me... but i really want to
> disappear. Ff it was just the directions and no talking to me maybe it would
> be okay.
>
> at best... the two of you meant well and i choose to believe that is the
> case. i certainly am not an expert in social protocol... far from it!
> (hillbilly guffaw)
>
> i think i will leave you with that sound bite as your parting image of me. :D
>

ook

TRANSLATION: and for anyone else who is not privy to this whole thing from the start... fluffykerfuffle decided to extricate herself from the library and lounge for the good of the place. She perceived that perhaps the reason no one was responding to the Writers Library and Lounge was because of carryover from their feelings about her and that, if it was clear she would not be interacting in the library and lounge threads, perhaps they wouldnt be so chary of coming in and enjoying it. Happynerd and Axi disagreed but went along with her experiment.

NARRATOR: The Librarian sighs heavily, shakes his head again, wishes them luck, and ambles out again and back to bed.

Okay...

I suppose thanks for that are in order Librarian...

I suppose this also means that for now I'm holding the fort. Sigh...