h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

So you're a local conch, I'm going to Key West in July to enjoy some summer heat. What's a good bar where I won't be only surrounded by tourists? Also, any suggestions on a nicer restaurant (w/ oysters) for a romantic soiree?
Thanks

Sorry I missed two days, it has been an interesting retail weekend.

July is a very good time to be in Key West, as the only tourists you are likely to encounter will be at the weekend. Plan on a daily rain shower, usually early (5 a.m. local time) and a rapid steam up as the day progresses. Temps have been unusually (90 degrees!) high early this year, so plan on light shirts and shorts, and bring the sun hats or plan to get one when you arrive. Sunscreen is a must.

Many people still cling to the old adage that you shouldn't eat mollusks or shellfish in months without "R", but they are served in many restaurants year-round here without much fuss. Budget will determine your choices: Half Shell Raw Bar is rough-and-ready, and barely more expensive than the fast food restaurants. A&B Lobster House will allow you to dress up and break out your MasterCard for a fine walloping. Both do a beautiful job with the oysters.

For a nice mix of the two, try Alonzo's, downstairs from A&B. They do a happy hour from 4 - 6 pm daily with drink specials and an interesting buffet offering fresh off the boat seafood. And it's right on the waterfront as well.

Next door is the White Tarpon, which will have an interesting mix of people no matter what time of day you arrive. Be careful with the Key Lime Martinis, though, because that's twelve ounces of alcohol you're quaffing there.

If you can tell me where you're staying, I can plug you in a little better, but the island is so small it's a moot point. If you fly in, don't waste money renting a car - we have electric vehicles, scooters and very quick cab service, so a car is just a parking hassle. Also, the bus system here is now on GPS, so the schedule works quite well (except on Sundays!) and there's nothing nicer than boarding a bus that's 25 degrees cooler than the outside temps. It costs $2 a ride, or you can purchase a weekly bus pass from the driver.

July is generally blissfully storm-free, although you might have a quick brush with a tropical depression or tropical storm. I guarantee that unless you have spent a night on Bald Mountain, you have never heard thunder and lightning carry on so. It's normal, but be prepared. If you are concerned about weather problems, spend a little on hurricane insurance for your trip. Then you can enjoy the good parts, and get near-complete refunds if the weather goes south.

Finally, welcome to Key West! Can't wait for you to experience our island.