Journal Entries

Day 3 (actually written on Day 4)

Ugh. I knew today was going to be a bad day last night when I woke up in my car. It took me a moment to realize it, but the car was moving along very quickly down an unlit country road. Looking out the window I saw a house that still had an enormous amount of christmas lights on and they looked very cheery. Then it occured to me that if I wasn't driving, who was? My wife and I had taken separate cars to her christmas party, after all, and I couldn't smell her (I'll explain some other time). I looked over at the seat next to me and to my horror it was empty. That's when I realized that I was driving and the evening's events came crashing back into my brain. Four double vodka martinis and two Belgian beers ago I had been at Kelleys Martini Bar and the party was winding down so Jennifer and I decided to go home. I must be the greatest actor in the world when I'm sauced 'cause somehow I managed to keep my keys, get in my car and drive away without anyone saying anything. Either that or it's the insurance money. Anyway I somehow made it home without incident and woke up this (yesterday) morning in a coma. Again, ugh. Oh, and Hank, my 110 lb. Great Dane/Mental Patient mix stomped on my balls. What a horrible day. I need to lie down now. Cheers!

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Latest reply: Jan 11, 2004

Day 2

Confusion! Chaos!

No, not really, but it sounds more dramatic than "Woke up, started a fire, drank coffee, let the dogs out, logged on." Actually I'm surprised at how early I'm up today (9:45 Central) considering how much whiskey I drank last night. I think I put away around 11 Windsor/7's before I collapsed into bed. This is one of the wonderful things about my wife, by the way: She never chastises me about drinking. Ever. Oh, she'll make fun of me if I'm hung over and demand that I still do all the things we had planned for the day but she never says things like "I wish you wouldn't drink so much" or "Why don't you look like Brad Pitt?" A truly wonderful, remarkable woman.

Now let's see, what's on the agenda for today, hmm? Writing? Watching a movie? Oh, I know, how about getting a job and making some money?! I keep waffling between working on my own (on a 100% commission basis) or getting a job somewhere outside the house. The thought of having to work in an office makes my blood run cold so I try not to think about it. I don't fit in an office as I'm unable to keep my true feelings to myself. Some people don't seem to have a problem with it (and really, why would they?) but most folks have some sort of aversion to voicing a real opinion. They're all very comfortable talking about the weather, or music, or television (which is another subject entirely) but as soon as you bring up religion, politics or their mothers they go stone-faced and quiet. After that you hear a lot of whispering and people smile at you too much. I'm perfectly capable of playing that game, and even acting the fool and entertaining (which makes you wildly popular as a 'drinking buddy') but at the end of the day it's pointless. If I'm going to act all day at work I may as well move to L.A. and become a struggling waiter.

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Latest reply: Jan 9, 2004

The Beginning

Having never kept a diary of any kind and never actually put feelings or thoughts down on paper (as it were) this will be an interesting experiment. I only hope I stick with it long enough for it to have some sort of benefit. Well, it's always best to start at the beginning, so I understand. It's not like you could start in the middle anyway, is it? So here we go:

We (my wife Jennifer and I) have just moved to Wisconsin from Minnesota. Back to Wisconsin, I should say. The first time we moved was to Minnesota from Wisconsin. We have a great house in the middle of nowhere on 10 1/2 acres of woods with a river in the backyard. There isn't a hell of a lot to do right now as it's winter and -5F outside at the moment, so I'm spending a lot of my time surfing the net and drinking warm things until about 3, when I switch to beer or gin and tonics. It's not a bad way to live, really, other than I have no real employment and therefore no real income. I've taken the first steps towards working as an independent mortgage broker (the benefit is that I can work out of the house) but I'm not sure if I want to work for the company my brother Brian does or start out on my own. I'm looking into net branching as well. It looks as if the startup costs are relatively the same either way, so I can't imagine why I wouldn't want to work for myself (net branching, that is). I would have more flexibility working with American (the one Brian works for), but I would have more independence working through Source Financial (or several other net branches) and more income. Or at least a larger share of the income generated. The only real stumbling block here is me getting my ass in gear and going out to get the business. It's there waiting, I just have to go get it.

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Latest reply: Jan 8, 2004


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monkeypotpie

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