h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I clicked on the thread but it hasn't taken me to anywhere - just put a reply box up.

Where am I!

There's never a handy you are here sign when you need one.

Could you make me one. I'm all fingers and thumbs today.

Hey, how about a you are here smiley? May take a while to get through the queue though.

Stupendoso! That could really take off! Do you have the time?

Well, I have bugger all else on at the moment.

You'll catch a chill!

And it settled right in the middle of my back.

Do you want me to give you a rub down with linament. I could apply it with a wire brush!

No cheers, by the way, there's 42 people logged on to the guide at the moment. I'm feeling all fluffy inside, but thats probably the pain killers.

Ah, I can diagnose that. You are getting stiff and feel fluffy inside - you're turning into a stuffed toy. Probably a teddy bear.

Bugger.

It's not irreversable so don't panic. But if you get any invitations to picnics in the meantime jump at them.

I try to avoid cuddly toys at all costs and then suddenlt find I'm turning into one. Can life get any more perverse?

Look on the bright side M. You could have a career in children's TV. You're going a bit yellow and your tummy is turning blue. Aha - you're not turning into a teddy bear - your turning into a Telly Tubby. La-la I think.

Thats it, where is the nearest short pier. I need to take a long walk.

I wouln't bother you'd only have to do it "Again!"

Sorry, don't follow.

Not a Tellytubbiy afficionado then. When ther is a film clip in the programme the Telly Tubbies all jump up and down shouting "Again!" (or was it "A-den") and it gets replayed.

Well, its the students in Oxford that have the reputation for watching the offending fuzz monsters. I was in Manchester, a nice safe distance away.