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Subbing the Venus novels

Post 1

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

Hello again smiley - smiley

I am subbing The Venus Novels by Edgar Rice Burroughs, here: A87929400 <--- please go subscribe.

smiley - cheers
GB
smiley - galaxysmiley - tekcorsmiley - planet


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 2

Bluebottle

smiley - ta

<BB<


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 3

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

To help connect the novelettes, a foreword states that both Duare had been condemned to death by her father Mintep for talking to and falling in love with Carson.

"both"? Is there something missing there?


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 4

Bluebottle

smiley - ta - Thanks for taking this one on too, it's the last entry on Burroughs' books but two not entirely unrelated entries will find their way into Peer Review one day, they're 4th and 5th in the queue.

Anyway, you're right that there was something missing – it should be:
'To help connect the novelettes, a foreword states that both Carson and Duare had been condemned to death by her father Mintep, who was prepared to sacrifice his only child for talking to and falling in love with Carson.'

<BB<


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 5

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

smiley - biro

"Like Nah-ee-lah in The Moon Main," - something wrong there, shouldn't it be The Moon Maid?


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 6

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

Burroughs was always a highly inventive writer whose work moved in unpredictable directions, but in this series it sometimes seems that he has lost interest in the tales he is telling. The first book has a satire on Communism with the lurking background threat of the sickle-phantic Thorists. It sets up the idea of waging a piratical campaign against the Thorists, but his privateering ship and the Thorists disappear by the start of the second book, never to appear again. By always moving the story in unpredictable new directions, more than ever before are previously important plot lines left unresolved or forgotten.

Let's just break that down:
You say:
Burroughs was always a highly inventive writer whose work moved in unpredictable directions, but in this series it sometimes seems that he has lost interest in the tales he is telling.
smiley - galaxy this seems to mean that this (Venus) series doesn't move in unpredictable directions.
Then you say:
By always moving the story in unpredictable new directions, more than ever before are previously important plot lines left unresolved or forgotten.
smiley - galaxywhich appears to be saying the series *does* move in unpredictable new directions, ie a criticism?

Sorry if I've misunderstood.


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 7

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

>>This view, of course, has no scientific validity; the eugenics programme was instead used to prosecute people with different backgrounds from those making the decisions.<<

Do you mean "to persecute people"?


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 8

Bluebottle

Ah yes, Nah-ee-lah is in the Moon Maid (looks like I was undecided between Moon Man or Moon Maid).

You could tweak the first sentence of that paragraph to read:

Burroughs was always a highly inventive writer whose work moved in unpredictable directions, but in this series this is taken to an extreme. It sometimes seems that he is losing interest in the tales he is telling and consequently constantly changing them, making the narrative at each novel's end have little in common with the story at the start. The first book has a satire on Communism with the lurking background threat of the sickle-phantic Thorists who dominate the entire planet.

Hopefully that now makes sense?

<BB<


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 9

Bluebottle

Oh, and yes persecute rather than prosecute.smiley - ta

<BB<


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 10

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

All tweaked smiley - biro and ready for your read-through smiley - ok


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 11

Bluebottle

Looks good to me smiley - biggrin
Thanks once againsmiley - hug

<BB<


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 12

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

You're welcome! smiley - hug

smiley - magic button pressed! smiley - zoom


Subbing the Venus novels

Post 13

h2g2 Guide Editors

Congratulations! Your Entry is on the Front Page today smiley - magic


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