h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Sorry the sentence about apologising doesn't taste right for what I meant to say... You have no need to apologise because I waffled on on Tuesday - the conversation is fair as we each take turns to speak, which is excellent

I fixed my bike's chain this morning! It is one of those tasks that takes ages and is fiddley, especially as the chain has to be on exactly right in order to work, and it kept slipping into the wrong place on one side when I wasn't looking, which meant that it took me 3 goes to put on properly. It only took a split-second for the chain to slip into the wrong place the first two times, but each time it did so took me about 20-25 minutes to undo and start again, but I got there in the end. And indeed got to work – it didn't even break on the way in!

Yesterday I was able to persuade my wife to give me a lift home, but it did take over an hour. Tonight will be worse with all the roads closed and no trains, so I hope the bike will hold together long enough. Possibly even to get me to parkrun too as Eastleigh is still cancelled, and with no roads or rail it is cycle to Southampton or not run.
The latest rail headline is 'No Trains at Eastleigh Likely for Several Weeks' http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-hampshire-51327941 Good job you visited when you did!

Hopefully in yesterday's waffle the meaning I was striving to convey came across. For us humans, the phrase that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction doesn't really apply. So it probably is best just to shrug, admit the world is mad and go to Sandown for a swim in the sea.

But talking of the sea I'll be running the Ryde 10 Mile Run on Sunday, if I can wake up early enough. That'll be hilly.

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‘Chasing Amy’ etc is thought-provoking... I can see how the film could be viewed as reinforcing the stereotype that ‘the right man could ‘cure’ a lesbian’, so whatever the intent, it comes with ‘baggage’, but it is ‘emotional baggage’ as you say, so it needs handling appropriately. In turn the criticism could be viewed as reinforcing stereotypes of bisexual erasure, etc so it is complicated.

The later film is also intriguing – I can imagine there was mixed criticism of that, too, as it might reinforce the stereotype that ‘gay people aim to ‘convert’ straight people’, and many a straight man would be offended by the suggestion that their sexuality could change, but on the other hand Banky is potentially a positive portrayal of a bisexual man.

“So I've come to the conclusion that the best review on the issue of sexuality for 'Chasing Amy' would probably be: 'Good effort – obviously tried hard but basic errors made. 7/10, see me.'”

Yes, that would be a constructive review. “They don't need much encouragement to be put off covering those topics after all…” is very true… And that’s another stereotypical problem, that if someone makes a polite request, they can be politely ignored, but if someone says something stronger then they are oversensitive, overemotional and overreacting so they should be ignored… I am very grateful to all the people through the ages who have worked to find ways to get their message across to improve things for everyone and I aim to do my own little bit eg by giving feedback on train journeys, etc about what works well and what needs improvement

Yikes, that is nasty about the derailment causing so much disruption Good job I visited when I did indeed so all my plans worked out as planned I can adapt to circumstances if required (eg the times when the station staff forgot to help me get on/off the train when I needed to) but my plans were already quite complicated, so I'm glad I didn't have all that to worry about as well...

Glad your wife was able to rescue you yesterday, and well done for fixing the bike I hope your wife is able to get to where she needs to go today, and I hope you are able to get through OK on your bike

"For us humans, the phrase that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction doesn't really apply. So it probably is best just to shrug, admit the world is mad and go to Sandown for a swim in the sea."

Wise words indeed

I hope your go well

Fortunately I'm moving away from the controversy of 'Chasing Amy' and get to enjoy the controversy of 'Dogma' instead.

The went well. As I'm about 6 minutes slower than my PB on a 5k distance I optimistically assumed I'd be 10 minutes slow for a 10 mile. So while in the past I've completed 10 miles in under 90 minutes I thought 1 hour 40 would be realistic for my current level of fitness. My exact time this year was 1 hour 40 minutes and one second, so that was an accurate prediction. As I finished my Dad was at the finish line so I had lunch with him and my stepmum, and then met up with friends.
Members of the running club had shared cars to get to the run, but because I stayed behind I made my own way back. As Eastleigh is out of order I managed to jump on the train to Southampton from Pompey seconds before the doors closed at Pompey. When I got off at Southampton to go to the rail replacement area, it was chaos. There were buses from all over the UK there and someone wearing a hi-viz vest labelled 'Trespass & Welfare Officer' seemed in charge. That old clichéd combination…
I asked him if there was a to Eastleigh and he directed me and about a dozen others to a double-decker in Bath livery. We got on, but the driver moaned, 'I don't have to drive anywhere, I'm only the support driver, there should be a minibus instead, I only go where I'm told'. The driver then tried to get us to get off and he had an argument with the hi-viz wearing man saying that his shift was due to finish in half an hour and he didn't want to do another journey, and he wanted us to go on a different bus. In the end he reluctantly agreed to drive to Eastleigh, but on arriving there he didn't turn into the station forecourt and drove slightly past the turning, despite the marshalls at Eastleigh trying to direct him in. He then stopped right on the crossing next to Charlotte Yonge and shouted 'everyone off!' while a queue of traffic gathered behind him, also blocking pedestrians from crossing to the station. We passengers jumped off and he drove right off without going into the forecourt, presumably so he could go straight home and not be asked to drive back to Southampton. Very bizarre.

You may be pleased to know that the phrase 'Blue and green must never be seen' will feature heavily in the story 'Desperately Trying to Bung Random Rants Together in the Hope of Fooling People Into Thinking This is a Story Somehow', which is being serialised in under the abbreviated title 'Random Rants', which I feel doesn't quite have the same impact.

Did your weekend involve wildlife, charity lunches and probate as you expected?

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Wow, well done with the , and for predicting your result Glad you had a good day with your dad and friends, too

Not good about the chaos, though... I saw the 'Trespass & Welfare Officer's when I was there, and thought that combination was strange - I found them rather a daunting presence, but it sort of seems as though they should be more of a supportive presence at the same time, so that is a mixed role!

Glad you managed to get a safely to Eastleigh, even though the driver wasn't in a good mood, to say the least, and caused yet more chaos... Bizarre indeed...

I found out the charity lunch is next week, but I did indeed enjoy a goodly amount of wildlife and got some probate work done. I also found a photo album I've not seen for years - it's not the one I was thinking of, but it still contains some pleasing photos of me as a baby/toddler, so I digitised a few of the photos and will upload them later

I look forward to seeing blue and green in 'DTBRRTHFPTTSS' soon! 'Random Rants' is easier to say, but doesn't have the same flavour, no!

Talking of charity lunches, at nammet time I went to the charity shop, where I overheard a man asking to buy a large 5p bag – and nothing else. He was repeatedly told the store (& chain's?) policy was only to sell bags to customers, but if he wanted to buy something else he could buy a bag too. He was very angry and left, after which one of the managers/senior volunteers told the person on the till that it was the shop/chain's policy to never sell just a bag, as people had in the past then used the bag bought to shoplift and steal goods from the shop. Whereupon a little old lady in the queue started saying, very adamantly, 'you don't get shoplifters here, do you?' and when both the ladies volunteering there said that they did indeed, she got more and more frustrated, repeating again and again, increasingly insistent, 'you don't get shoplifting in here.'

So it all goes to show that the is mad .

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"So it all goes to show that the is mad ."

Wow, yes indeed... And you're particularly seeing that this week, what with one thing and another... More 'DTBRRTHFPTTSS' material for you, anyway

It would be good if shoplifting could be stopped by just insisting that it doesn't happen, but it does make me wonder if the person doing the insisting had shoplifted something... Either that, or the person was convinced that people can't steal something that has been donated...

I had a productive evening last night - I was on the phone for ages, but got work done and enjoyed catching up with people as well, and I also managed to upload the photos and update my Bird List as well as the usual stuff I see I'm up to 49 birds already

Ah yes, but talking about 'DTtVRRTitHoFPiTTiaSS', the blue and green probably won't appear in for about 12 weeks, so apply a very loose definition of 'soon' there…

I don't know why someone would argue that shoplifting doesn't happen when it does – sometimes people just don't want to be wrong and don't really care what they're arguing about per se, as long as they're not wrong…? Any explanation or guess at this point is probably as valid as any other. Theft is the act whereby a person dishonestly appropriates property belonging to another with the intention of permanently depriving the other of it; and 'thief' and 'steal' shall be construed accordingly, you know.

I've not really been on since yesterday nammet time – I was pipetting last night with the family I'll see if I can have a look later. In the meantime, here's some photos to whet your appetite: http://onthewight.com/the-story-of-the-white-tailed-eagle-and-the-audacious-carrion-crow/ (or indeed wet the appetite for a phrase)

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"Any explanation or guess at this point is probably as valid as any other."

Yes - as you said a while ago, there is an art to a proper argument or debate, and that's not it...

Glad you found my photos and enjoyed your pipetting puppeting

Those are superb photos - thank you! I love the expressions on the faces of the birds when the crow is in the trench after tweaking the White Tailed Sea Eagle's tail!

That is a classic phrase

It's an uneventful day here, although the good news is that the boardwalk has reopened! It is only half as wide as it used to be in the worst-affected corner, so I'm not sure two bikes going in opposite directions are able to pass, but being on a blind corner it would be difficult to know whether there's a bike coming in the opposite direction before you reach that point. But still, it is nevertheless open.

Incidentally 'DTtBRRTitHoFPiTTiaSS - Part 6' could be seen as featuring a character who doesn't have an internal monologue, only an external one. Although that's probably reading too much into it…

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I had a busy day yesterday, with lots of bitty things again, but my manager and I got quite a lot done, so that's the main thing More bitty things so far today, but I'm making progress <-- baby archaeopteryx

That is good news that the boardwalk has reopened - you'll have to ring your bell at the worst affected corner, like trains hoot at certain points!

Ah, I look forward to seeing Part 6 in due course - yes, many of these scenarios have a psychology perspective, like Part 4 A87967255 gives an example of cognitive dissonance

It's funny how the gentleman in Part 4 looks remarkably like Zachariah, only without the tea towel or dressing gown… In one instalment I did find myself having drawn an elderly couple who I thought looked too similar to those Biblical characters, so I thought I'd better do something to differentiate them and ended up giving the 'Elizabeth' a walking stick, whereas in 'The Nativities are Restless' the real Elizabeth never has a walking stick.

That's a good idea about the ringing the bell at the corner – which reminds me that when I did the Moors Valley parkrun, a stretch of which is adjacent to the Moors Valley Railway, I passed a sign saying 'Whistle' and so I did . The trouble with bells is I have the new-fangled kind on my bike. In warm, dry weather it rings out loud and clear, 'diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggg!!!!!!' But in damp weather the same effort merely results in a short, barely audible 'dh'.

At work the new VC has started and fortunately she has made no impact on the uni whatsoever to date – let's hope that long continues.

Yesterday was another one of those days when of our (supposed) team of six it was just me… I keep being told we're a team of six but I'm not sure that we're using the same counting system, as to me one plus one plus one plus half does not equal six? (And that's generously including my line manager)

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Yes, the man definitely has Zechariah's beard I like his walking stick, with what looks like a Flexifoot Ferrule I'm impressed by your different depictions - my mum admired Dr Beeching's nose in What the Dinosaur, too!

"I passed a sign saying 'Whistle' and so I did " - What is the newfangled kind of bell? I have certainly heard one, when I went to the RSPB Sheep Farm/Cycle Path/Footpath - a very distinctive but barely audible 'dh' indeed so the cyclist had to say 'ding' as well

"let's hope that long continues" - Yes indeed. Ours is settling in, so we will see how things develop... That is a strange counting system - I can't work that one out, either

I went out for the family meal last night and didn't have the best time, because one order was forgotten and it was just typical that it was mine, so I had to wait until 8.30pm after being hungry at 7pm... That didn't do my biorhythms much good and nor did one of my uncles wanting to play the 'Debate the Daily Mail Headline' game he invented, but my digestive system calmed down when I got home... I plan to be having lunch tomorrow with my sister, anyway, so that should be better all round.

I hope you all have a good weekend

I'd forgotten that the old man had a walking stick in that one – I should really have given the old man the walking stick again in the elderly couple picture as that way it would imply it is the same character…

The traditional style of bike bell has springs and rotational cogs inside, so that when you pull the 'trigger' 'ringer' it rotates the internal wheels to ring it out loudly:
http://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcR1wSpF4pDGxt7Wr3rHM51tHvFGeRgf8LPFGGylfRaQXzLvcS8E
More recent ones just tend to flick the ringer onto the bell's surface: http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcQD4f-LyKf6cCC7QlKmkhsr_tU-l71gvDIj4qz_8HhwwOvnRA2Ut8mX0DI0gc6BCUotRKmRMss&usqp=CAc
They take up less room but they're not as loud or reliable in wet weather. However in wet weather the bike breaks squeak louder

Sorry to hear you didn't have the best dinner out. I've had a family meal this year – did I say that I met my Dad when I ran the Ryde 10 and stayed awake long enough to eat a pie? What had you ordered that was forgotten? I dread to think what the Daily HateMail headline was in any case… I must admit I sneaked onto the related website but it turns out that the headline today is that Phillip Schofield has come out of the broom cupboard to say he is gay, which I would have thought is a personal matter for him and not a topic to be debated in a restaurant. Unless I suppose you were arguing that, having been married for umpteen years, is he bisexual after all? As I've never met him it doesn't really seem to be any of my business either way.

Today has been a day of literal ups and downs – I've been on interview meet and greet duty, taking candidates up to the fourth floor. They're here applying for the remains of the maternity cover post that we had originally had back in September to replace the girl who quit back in November.

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Ah, yes the new bell is small, but I can see why it doesn't always ring out clearly like the 'trigger' ones do.

Glad you got to partake of pie when you met your dad I ordered chicken with mashed potato and veg but everyone who ordered pies got their meal

If the headline had been what it was today, my uncle would have thought twice before playing that game - he wouldn't want to risk 'catching homosexuality' by talking about gay people... Yes, it is an interesting choice of words that Philip Schofield used, but it is his personal identity, so it's not a debate indeed... I saw him in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat, but didn't meet him backstage. The topic yesterday was about unemployed people - in the HateMail someone on Universal Credit said they felt under pressure, so my uncle asked me why they said that, but all I could say was, 'I don't know'. I tried to emphasise that I have been an unemployed person, so there is no 'us' and 'them', and social security is important, but that didn't help my uncle to 'win' the game so he wasn't interested. Luckily I know he's a good man overall, as he was very supportive of us in November and at Christmas, but I will find something else to do if he starts to play that game next time we meet, because I didn't find it funny...

Interview meet and greet is a physical job! I hope all goes well with that. I had an amusing time today, that I e-mailed two people to offer them one of 20 things, and lo and behold they both picked the same one but I managed to find a compromise

Ah – I've never, to the best of my knowledge, been in the vicinity of Philip Schofield. Gordon the Gopher, yep, I've seen him. But not Philip Schofield. Or Sarah Greene or anyone else from 'Going Live!' come to that (I don't watch daytime telly so still consider him a children's television presenter 'cos that's how I remember him). I'm not sure it sounds like a fun game, especially as there are an almost infinite number of reasons why someone could feel under pressure.
These include:
The terror of knowing what the world is about
Watching some good friends screaming "Let me out!"
Praying tomorrow gets me higher
Pressure on people, people on streets
Burning a building down
Splitting a family in two

And that's just to name a few…
How was your weekend? Saturday involved parkrun in the morning at Eastleigh for the second or third time this year – I was bitten by Blandford flies and have inflated in three different areas. The afternoon involved a secret activity which I'm not going to mention at this point in time (not that I don't trust you, but theoretically this is conversation is open to be read by anyone and I've been asked to keep the secret secret) It won't be secret long in any case…

Yesterday I spent the day indoors avoiding the storm, and built a castle. The children had been all excited about helping, but after I opened the box they both decided they weren't interested after all. The remained very interested in the smell that the castle pieces were made out of, though. (This would make sense if you see the picture on )

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Yes, those are numerous potential reasons to feel under pressure indeed!

That is early in the year to be bitten by flies, but not unexpected given how mild the winter is so far - I hope the inflations soon go down... I had a good Saturday as planned - excellent lunch out with my sister

Good idea to stay indoors and build a scented castle to avoid the storm! I had to go out food shopping with mum, but we avoided the morning deluge so it wasn't too bad, although we had to drive through a newly-formed lake to get to the shops in the afternoon. Could have been worse, though, as I saw on the news there were some severe floods elsewhere... I did more probate work as well so it was a productive weekend

I'm very glad to hear you had an enjoyable lunch with your sister on Saturday and survived the stormy weather. I wasn't too badly affected, though when cycling home in the dark yesterday over all the detritus, a branch was caught up by my front wheel and bent my mudguard out of shape…
Have all the lakes gone away up where you are now?

Annoyingly I've inadvertently lent someone a DVD. I had discussed 'Asterix' with a work colleague a few weeks ago and had said that there was a new Asterix film out, and he didn't believe me. Last Monday I bought it when it was released with my birthday money and, seeing him on the way back to my desk, I showed him the new film – still in its wrapping - to say 'look, here's proof that the film 'Asterix and the Secret of the Magic Potion' exists!', only his response was 'ah, thanks for lending this to me' which made me feel rather put on the spot, so I sort of agreed that I'd lent it to him. Only it has been over a week now, so when can I start dropping hints that I'd like the DVD back (especially as it was new and in its wrapper).

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Yes, the detritus is difficult - one of my front wheels picked up a large twig in the dark a couple of weeks ago, but thankfully no damage was done as I caught it quickly. Not good about the mudguard, but at least your front wheel is OK...

There was one small lake yesterday on the way to work, but plenty of room to drive round it, so that was fine, and it had gone by today. We had a bit of hail yesterday, but then the sun came out, and today is quite pleasant, but cold. The office sauna furnace seems to have been switched off, so it has been relatively cold indoors this week, but not too bad - just means I don't have to take my suit jacket off when I arrive in the building.

Ah, that is a difficult situation that caused you to accidentally loan someone your brand new DVD... I would say a week is long enough to ask for it, especially as you can say you are looking forward to watching the film... Good luck with that...

I forgot to mention I watched an episode of 'SuperTed' at the weekend. I think it had been carefully selected to be Mostly Harmless as it wasn't easy to work out what was going on at first (it was from the middle of the 1983 series), but it was amusing enough! The DVD has four more episodes on it, so I will see what they are like soon