h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I woke up one day on this strange planet called America so I dug into the ruins of its dreams and found that ancient continent of Atlantis in its red soil right under the asphalt parking lots of shopping malls and endless highways.

What happened to earth? I found Earth is now called Germany but that term for my ancient homeland is now used for this entire spinning ball of dirt and water swarming with billions of people.

I was told I was descended from an ape but I didn't believe it so I went into dream trance and met my ancestress and she is a tall golden-maned lion woman named Gotha daughter of God who was the Emperor of the Gothinian Empire. But now that ancient empire is fractured into countries that call themselves Europe.

In the last year tho I have seen that empire reforge into a unit called NATO North Atlantic Treaty Organization which really is Otan a new version of that ancient empire.

Just now looking out the window of my private dream box aparment I see a gold haired woman, daughter of Gotha for she lives in a million women on this Earth.