h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They do too. I'll show you how much like a beach it is in May when I truggle you in backwards.

You're going to dig a hole in me and put sand in it, aren't you?

Yes. I'm growing and laquering my nails in preparation.

Weeeeellllaaaahhhh! If me not filling in my journal is creating such hilarious banter, I'll never write again!

Seriously, I've been working so hard, you'd have thought I invented it... I've mostly been writing articles and bits about my America travels (which will appear all over the place pretty soon for your iminent avoidance!), as well as learning Perl and generally doing too much stuff on the side like playing the piano, scanning photos, saving the world from 500-foot lizards - that kind of thing.

Incidentally, I'm planning to truggle to China. Who's with me?!

OOoooo! I will! I will!! Can I be your bucket girl who will hoist full buckets of sand out of the hole as you get deeper and deeper? Just a question though, won't it be hard to kneel in a hole that goes all the way back to .... England I guess? Or will you truggle so that your feet and butt stick out, mooning all of China?

Also, I know your mother has told you this, but working like you invented it and learning the piano will make you go blind.

Wait just one second, just ONE SECOND HERE!!! He said something very, very important that no one else even MENTIONED, and everyone (okay, just Krissy so far) just let it go by, la-dee-da and all.

Now let me get this straight--you were SCANNING PHOTOS???? I thought they only did that in bad 1950s-era Japanese movies!