h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The Media Vs The Guide

Posted Apr 29, 1999

Some argue that the media on many planets, such as Earth (Sol III), Hipocgets (Espilon III) and Ischelon (Hybro II) to be a figement of someones delusional imagination.

Unfortunatly, these sentiants are incorect, but only to a certian point.

These planet's iformation transmission , be it by paper, electrons, radiated waves or naked females , is actually a shared delusion, of people who would like to think that someone in the universe cares what they think.

These people throw masses of monetary units (and given that the currency of Ichelon is expoding plasma blasts, which can make a financial transaction extreamly dangerous) trying to convince people that their delusion is the true state of affairs of their planet.

Other people attempt to influence these delusions for their own gains (a good example is the Gun Lobby on Earth (Sol III) who commonly use the media to sell the message "Guns dont Kill". This lead to the Kzangar Weapons Corperation of Gergun VI's advertising department to roll around on the ground in laughter (which inadvertantly killed the Quality Control Department, as a Gerguni rolling on the ground is almost as dangerous as an exploding sun). After the rubble was cleared, the Advertising department used modified the slogan to "If your guns dont kill, use ours". Unfortuantely the loss of the Quality Control Department proved to be the undoing of the Kzangar Weapons Corperation as the Friendmaker 2000 line of partical hand cannons proved to be extreamly dangerous to their users, and the resulting damages payout , including the "Truth in Advertising" fine, bankrupted the company).

The Guide , however, being run by boderline sane perople, fell that throwing around any monetary units (especially Ichelonian Plasma Explosions) to be a waste of time and money. So the Hitchhikes Guide to the Galaxy pays nothing for articals. This has the result that any rich media owner (excpet those from Ichelon, anyone with that much firepower needs to be respected) would feel that the guide was actually not part of their delusion, and therefore easy to ignore.

This is not to say that being a writer for the Guide is not without rewards, as the Guide contributers are known to throw the best parties, and the free electronic thumb given to all corrispondants means that a life of adventure awaits any who write for the Guide (and the Tython Piza Palor and Mortuary do give great discounts to corrispondants).

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Latest reply: Apr 29, 1999