h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

At work and unable to go for a fry-up, worse luck!
Otherwise, I'm drinking a lot of black coffee and fantasising over what to have for lunch.
What did you get up to last night?
I am in a pickle because this girl (who isn't my ex) asked me if i wanted to go out tonight. There is a definite chemistry but I don't want to jepodize anything I may have with the ex. What do you think? go for it or not?

Last nite..me...f*ck all mate, listened to talksport had a kebab, watched a bit of telly, then hit the hay, boring really

Cant you just go with this girl without it leading anywhere, your mind is elsewhere so if there is a chance dont blow with another chick, but that not to say that you still cant see this other girl as a friend.

Play it by ear bud, if it seems to get a bit heavy explain to her the reason, she what she says

Yum...could just do with a kebeb right now. Donor or chicken? Or Both?!

Oh, cheers for the advice. I'm such a f***ing stud innit?!

Dogs meat i think, chilli sauce and those funny looking peppers shaped like dry snot, f*cking hot, the old a*se burner in the morning job

Yea you studly, how do you do it man, all these chicks wanting you

Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm a womans man no time to talk!

, can you dance also then, i bet you have that white suit as well

As a matter of fact, I do have a white suit! I'm all about retro style! Can't dance to save my life though, I do the white mans overbite!

You are Mr.Travolta

Not a scientologist though!

, you lost me there

It's this weird assed religion that Travolta and Cruise are into. Something to do with aliens and sh*t. Stupid stuff.

, read about that, with all their millions why go into stupid sh*t like that, whats the f*ck up with these people, bored sh*tless no doubt

Being a celebrity leaves a hole in your soul and these jerk-offs try and fill it with anything they can. Drugs, weird sex or (more often than not) f***ed up religion. Give me drugs and weird sex any day. Mind you, I think all religions are f***ed up.

Religion, dont get me started, its the biggest bringer of doom to the world, i have no connection to any, its all a load of SH*T, these preaching do gooders can all f*ck off

Never has a truer word been said. My Mum went to a Catholic school in America run by Nuns and they used to kick the f*** out of all the little kids. Thats so kindly of them.
They are all hypocrites and idiots and they WILL bring about the apocolypse and then say 'well,it was all in the bible'.
F***ing w***ers!!!

I had two stupid prats at my door last week, showing me the watchtower magazine, so i showed them my middle finger told them to f*ck each other and said if they come back to my house again i will burn them alive, i think they got the picture

Years ago at Uni some Jo-Jos cam kocking at my door and I invited them in, told them my philosophy of life, told them what i thought of religion, specially theres and shocked them into leaving. It felt great for them to be on the receiving end for a change.

Excellent, thats the way to do it, let them believe that you are interested and then unleash hell on them

What time you finish work then, this site is very quiet isnt it, i checked the online link, there are over 2500 people on here, where are they all

Finish work at 5pm as per.
You got a day off?
Yeah, it is quiet...maybe people are having lunch!